Sea Change...Profound Transformation

When I got Sea Change as myWord for the Year, I didn't even know what it meant, I had never heard of it before.  After a little research I found it's meaning to be Profound Transformation.  As the New Year began I moved through my Yearly Rituals...one of them being Amy Palko's Word Goddess reading.  Sure enough it too confirmed that Profound Transformation would find me this year.

My Word Goddess was...

Nyai Loro Kidul...Indonesian Sea Goddess...her words...song, clarity, release, detox and Transformation. "Nyai Loro Kidul’s presence over this year as a divine invitation to disengage from the negative conditioning that is keeping you silent, so that you can choose to let your song sing you. Almost like a cultural or psychological detox where you can release any negative thought patterns
that are just not serving you."

And so it began...as the year unfolded...I was challenged to do a lot of releasing...some of which has been incredibly hard.  Like the loss of my "day job"...a job that was keeping me small and forcing me to give away my power...though it did provide a steady income...and it's been a long hard year financially for us.

My other Yearly Rituals involve...

Receiving my power animal for the year.  The Wolf graced me this year...Free Spirited, Path-finding, Community.  "The Wolf will teach you how to balance individuality with society"...(how appropriate is that for me). "The Wolf will also give you great stamina and perseverance."

And that it did...I had to muster up all I had, to show up...especially towards the end of the year when I just kept being challenged to show up...thank you Wolf for your gifts or stamina and perseverance. What I found myself doing was having to DIG Deep...but what I noticed was that it was different than my usual "just push through it" attitude. Brené Brown nailed it in her book the "Gifts of Imperfection", which I'm currently reading.  There she explains that when we live whole heartedly and find ourselves exhausted and overwhelmed...we DIG Deep..but in a different way.

I became more Deliberate in my thoughts and behaviors and I did this through Sacred Practices...meditation, prayer, setting intentions on the New Moons and releasing on the Full Moons. I even invited Creative Magick into my life more than ever before...through Spinning and Knitting, Super Soul Journey with Whitney Freya and concluding these last 100 days of the year with the commitment of Art Journaling everyday.

I was Inspired to step out of my comfort zone, see the world through new eyes, make different choices, some of which were difficult but sometimes we have to do what we have to do.  Others which challenge my Fears...especially that of not being seen and heard.

And the last as she puts it Going...taking action.  And I have in various ways...one of which was taking a Leadership training class.  I'll will be completing my Wild Woman Circle Leadership training and become a part of an International Community...The Wild Woman Project.  Our bible is "Women Who Run With Wolves"...thank you again Wolf medicine.

I also choose a Mantra to live into and mine was "I am Open".  I recited it often...especially when I felt challenged and overwhelmed and when I wanted to invite new possibilities and opportunities for growth and expansion.  And they came, hard and deep and I embraced each one.

My journey this year has been...

a challenging one to say the least...from the news of my Pre-diabetic diagnose, to the challenges of letting go my most precious companions of the past 20 years...my familiar WillowMyst and our little wise woman Raja. I suppose I really wasn't prepared for the immense transformations that have
occurred for me...but even still, as tears burn down my face while typing this...I...have ...felt...guided.  Even when I felt I hit rock bottom and questioned my existence on this plane...I still was guided to answers...to healing.

And so as the year is rounding down to an end...I continue to DIG Deep...Be Open...and let Sea Change wash over me...

"Embracing the Earth and Moon Energies She ignited her
Passion Reclaimed her Magick and invited
Sea Change to wash over her." ~Allurynn 

What lessons have you learned this past year?  How have you been guided to walk though this life existence?

Creating on a Different Kind of Canvas...

I spent the week preparing fiber

and doing a lot of dyeing!  For those who don't know we own Alpacas and have a Fiber Arts and Tool business.  We sell our products mostly on Etsy, but there are a few Fairs and Shows we do throughout the year.  One of which is coming up in a few weeks, the Black Sheep Gathering in Eugene, OR.

The boys have been busy making 

the various tools we offer to take to the show.  Tools that are used to process fiber, like Blending
Boards, Combs and Hackles, Dizs, and other spinning accessories.

The Art of Becoming Me...

It is said that the the lotus flower starts as a small flower down at the bottom of a pond in the mud and muck.  As it slowly grows it moves up towards the water's surface continually moving towards the light.  Once it comes to the surface of the water, the small flower begins to blossom and turn into a beautiful lotus.

The lotus is my healing symbol...

One of my first pieces of art, a
reflection from my Healing Meditation 

it came to me during a healing meditation I did in 2011...as I held it in my hands it burst into life, exhaling sparkling starlight, I've never forgotten the magick in the air and the feeling of being complete in that moment. And so...I knew that like the Lotus I too could rise from the muck and blossom...and my healing deepened.

My healing journey has been...

an endless cycle, just when I thought I had it down, discovered a new tool to add to my medicine bag...I find myself back at the beginning.  Unable to find my way through the muck again, getting swallowed by it.  Seems no sooner do I find healing, transformation and clear a layer, that another shows up and it's more challenging then the last.  But I know each time I find myself getting through that muck, I'm that much closer to my dream, my truth, my vision...to breaking the surface and becoming me.

With each new layer cleansed...

comes a deeper understanding, a deeper wisdom and I know as much as it sucks...the muck is there for a reason. I remember reading in the Alchemical Healing book by Nicki Scully that "it is through a kind of death and renewal that we find great benefit from what initially appears to be our most challenging situations."  

But it isn't easy...

and some days are really challenging and it's harder to get through the mud and muck no matter what tools I use from my medicine bag to get through it.  Those are the times I see my old patterns of dealing with my "stuff" resurface and I feel I've moved one step forward only to go two steps back.  In all reality...these patterns are going to keep coming up over and over again, until they are transformed.  Our old patterns will always be a part of our life but that doesn't mean we have to give into them.  In fact, with each time, they lose their power quicker and it becomes a conscious choice to not get stuck there.

In the meantime...

I continue to breathe...reminding myself to find serenity in the mist of the challenges. Reminding myself that I am loved, I am worthy and most of all I am being seen and heard; despite finding proof of the opposite. Because you see, that's what my patterns are used to doing, finding the proof and getting stuck in my story.

I now choose to move through life...

Mapping out my coaching process...

with Grace and Ease...from a place of self-love, self-awareness and self-realization.  All of which I get closer to as I clear more layers.  Despite feeling like I'm going backwards at times and find myself in the beginning again...I embrace how far I've come and continue to remind myself that I am the co-creator of my own reality, with every thought whether positive or negative.  

So, remember when you find yourself at the beginning again, it's just another layer you are cleansing away.  Remember we are human too and our lives are a journey. Allow your cycles to help you dig deeper, believe in yourself and allow the art of becoming to wash over you, as you too reach for the surface.

Autumn Craft ~ Zendoodle Leaf Garland

Today I was suppose to work on my homework...

but I spend the morning play...with Autumn leaves instead, LOL.  Yesterday while waiting for my son's school bus I was enjoying the wonderful Autumn breeze, the scent as I was being rained upon by falling leaves!  I had my phone out while checking my FB when I was drawn to these big leaves falling, so I clicked my camera on and started snapping...I captured a shot as a large one was falling into my hand.  While looking at it, I got the idea to make a Autumn leaf garland.

But it wasn't til this morning when I found 

the time to go for a short Spirit walk up our drive to find some perfect leaves...which wasn't hard with all the leaves that are on the ground these days.  Then it hit me...I had read an article about dipping Autumn leaves in wax as a way to preserve them...and I thought, waxing them would help them be sturdier for threading.  And then I thought, why not Zendoodle on them first then dip them and string them!

So, I spent my morning doodling on leaves

instead of doing my homework...but oh was it fun...and relaxing.  It's been a hard week with all the home inspections and such and the waiting game is just soooo hard. I had to do something to get out of my funk and into a creative space...and yes, once I did, I was able to go right into doing my homework.

So this is what I did, 

I took out my white gel pen and a silver one too...though I wasn't fund of the silver one as much as the white, and I went for it...I doodled and doodled and doodled.  Before I knew it they were all done and I laid them out on the table to see my creations....Loved them!

I then started hunting for my wax...

believe it or not, the garage is still full of boxes, being unsettled for these past months stinks, cos half the time I'm digging through boxes cos' I don't know where anything is.  Okay...found the wax but not my little wax melting pot.  I wasn't about to ruin another pot, so I decided I was going to use a pie tin.

I put a chunk of wax on the tin

place the tin in a pan 1/2 full of water and turned it on Medium...it was perfect the wax started to melt and so I kept it on a low simmer to keep it hot.  I dipped each leaf one at a time and placed them on a sheet of wax paper.  Oh...and by the way, while dipping I was eating some chocolate...and you guessed it a piece fell in to the wax, I scooped it out but you can still see some specks of it :)

Once cooled, I took a thick thread 

and a needle and began to thread each leaf into a garland.  I then chose to have the little ones dangle from the larger ones...too cool...my first Zendoodle leave garland and Autumn craft for the season!

What did you create today?

Faeries...

I recently joined Lori-Lyn's Wings 11 days of Fae.  I loved her "Dancing with the Faeries" eKit...so I could not resist joining her in playing with the fae once again!  So yesterday I was inspired to create my Faerie alter...ooooh what fun I had.

I just spent 3 wonderful days full of hART with some amazing women

It was exactly the inspiration and healing that I needed.  After my move here to Oregon 3 months ago, I've been so unsettled and out of sorts, it's been really hard for me to dive deeply into art, so this gave me that kick I needed and now I can't stop creating.  Last night I completed the pennant that I started over the weekend. I also worked on the pages of the book we bound too!

So, today was the second day of Wings... 

and I realized I had yet to create my little faerie alter.  With all the creative juices I have flowing through me it didn't take much time to put it together.  I took a cigar box and lined it with some Gelli plate paper I made this weekend at the retreat.  We also made tape from the left over paint on the plate and that was perfect to use to line the outside of the box.

Of course I had to use some seashells...

so I made a little fountain decorated with little seashells I collected when I lived in Hawaii, many years ago. Filled the box with lots of moss and made a little pathway out of stone.  I took a golf tee and put one of my son's marbles on it and made a little gazing ball and also wrapped three more marbles in wire and place them as decorations on the far corner, both ideas I got from the web.

I made a little bench...

out of a flat seashell and a piece of bark and filled a small little box I had made of purple heart and black walnut woods, with lavender buds and tiny little gems, there's peridot, amethyst, pearls, mother of pearl, snake skin agate and a garnet.

Then I took a twig,

and made some tiny prayer flags to hand on it.  They have the Ganesh Mantra ~ Om Gam Ganapatayei Namaha written in Sanskrit on them.  Added purple ribbon on the box, with a gold little trim and a music note butterfly.  This was sooo much fun to make and ready for some magickal visitors!

My Sacred Goddess Journey...

I had a huge emotional release today...I listened to two songs that I have been listening to for the past couple months...but today I listened to them from a different place...I listened from a heart centered place...a place I'm starting to live into...accepting who I am inside and out...and...their lyrics moved me to tears, a deep hard cry really.

As a Goddess Sister had recently suggested to another sister...

I let myself cry, letting it wash the pain and the wounds, and let those tears be blessed with the holy water and unconditional love of the Goddess (Havi's words). All I can say is...it was POWERFUL!

A year or so ago I found my way an audio series, High Priestess Training, which ignited something in me...something that was a dying ember...my inner Goddess light. Rose Cole the author of the training defines the High Priestess archetype as...

"The High Priestess symbolizes serenity, wisdom, understanding and knowledge,...

From the Wizard's Tarot

an instinctual secret knowledge, she has a willingness to illuminate what otherwise may not be seen". "She has the ability to learn and to teach, she represents the perfect woman that all men want, she also trusts herself, she's attuned to her heart and to her emotions...she walks through life with grace and ease and she isn't afraid to shine."  In these audios she shared an archetype system of levels which she states we all go through and at times fall back into....starting with a "Slave Girl...depicting our lower self, stuck in drama and conflict, our reaction mode, when we feel enslaved by our life, a victim...when one thing bad happens to us after another.  Then there's the Chambermaid, a zone of competence as described by Gay Hendricks, in his book the Big Leap.  Life is okay and we are getting by...we have a job, partner, family...but we are not fulfilling our true life purpose...although we ARE getting by.  Then there's the Queen...Gay Hendricks calls this the Zone of excellence. When life is going well...you have a great partner and friends, you have a great life." Well, Rose takes it to the next level she believes there is the level of the High Priestess...which is bringing in the secret knowledge of the Universe and this consciousness that is other worldly...not only mastering our own life but also be able to teach and show others and pass on this knowledge.  Claiming we are not here for ourselves but for the higher good of the whole planet.

This totally spoke to me...

because I realized I lived most of my life in the Slave Girl level and most of the time would get stuck finding it difficult to move through it.  As I explained in my one and only video I ever made (which I hope to explore making more of)...when our inner Goddess Sparkles and we walk the path of what I call the Goddess path...we have the ability to created all sorts of miracles both big and small and inspire others to do the same.  In fact at times I've moved mountains and have continued to do so with my partner...but I also find myself falling back into the Chambermaid...being content but not happy or worse yet falling into the Slave Girl level.


Now...in her recordings she referred to a variety of things to do to elevate our vibration and STAY at that High Priestess level...one of them was energy work and removing Trapped Emotions (TE).  That's when I realized that even though we move forward through these levels...life happens and when it does it triggers these TEs that were associated with past happenings, making us fall back down again into the Slave Girl level.  Of course these audios led to a $25,000 total life transforming program.  Where all of the various subjects were explored in depth to help you transform your life. From what I heard and read it was just that, it was amazing to see the changes in these women.  But for me, no matter how much I thought that it was a wonderful personal investment...there was no freakin' way I could ever invest that much money, not on our financial budget...and so...I found myself stopped and it becoming an unattainable dream.  But...despite not knowing the how, I was totally open to Divine guidance and inspiration.

One of the things Rose shared that stuck with me...

is the importance of healing our physical bodies...she referred to our bodies as light bulbs and said we are taking in 1000 watts of Divine love, joy, inspiration and energy and then trying to put it into a 30 watt light bulb...which was our body, a bulb that is not strong enough and it short circuits.  I believe this happens because of the lack of self-love and self-care...we allow stress and life's challenges to bring us down to the Slave Girl level, where we can't feel let alone embrace our inner light. 

My recent health issues has drew me closer and closer to natural medicine, to both relieve chronic and acute pain and to taking control of my health and emotional state.  What I found was when a hardship hit...it just led to another and another...why? because that one hardship no matter how big or small would trigger the emotions I had yet to release and that would spiral me into depression, stress, sadness putting me in a negative state of mind which of course can only attract more negativity.

I have always been drawn to holistic healing...

balancing the mind, body and spirit...and through the use of Essential Oils, I'm doing just that.   I also continued to explore energy healing and as always...the Universe finds a way to provide that which we want most, be it positive or negative, it all depends on how much energy we put into creating it...and sometimes it doesn't show up in the way or even in the time frame you think it will...but it most always shows up in a bigger better way.

As it did with me...I found my way to an Essential Oil company and through the use of the Essential Oils I'm learning how truly powerful the essential oils are at balancing our emotions...shifting our moods and even assist in releasing TEs and using affirmations to shift our thought process, which assists in raising our vibrations.  Then, earlier this year the Universe brought Ali from Sea a Place of Love into my life through my Twin Spirit and dear friend Sara.  Ali is an intuitive healer and energy worker...and yes, through her I found the energy healing TE release that I was looking for, for so long.  I can not recommend her programs and healing gifts enough.

Aside from the oils and the energy healing...I've continued to use Art as a healing tool too. 

Painting the Goddess Within...still in the process of emerging

I have found much healing through my Art.  I remain open and let the Universe continue to guide me on my healing path.  Though all this work and learning I'm doing is often painful both physical and emotional...I find that I'm awaking, that something is shifting, stirring...which is all leading to me moving forward and fulfilling my life purpose.  Like Ali told me after I shared this morning's experience with her "it's not always easy and can be painful but it is kind of like giving birth, once you are through it all, you won't remember the pain...even the pain from the past will feel like another lifetime...and you will be free...in a whole new space and place."

I, like many of you, have often found myself in the past asking "why me?".  Now I find myself asking how?, how can I heal and move forward, how can I make a difference, but not only that, how can I teach every women I come in contact with that she too can do the same...and I continue to open my heart and let the Universe show me.

I aspire to live my life from a place of grace and ease...and to whole heartily be open to and embrace my inner Goddess light and in doing so, empower and inspire other women to do the same...because I believe we have the power to create and manifest not only for ourselves but for the world's highest good.

So...my journey continues...

Feeding my Soul with . . . Art

I decided to participate in Project 365 again this year...

I had such a blast being challenged in 2011, and with so much going on this year, I had to be sure to document it; and how better than to take a photo a day for 365 days!  I'm also doing Self Portrait Sundays...even thought there isn't a challenge going on, I felt I needed to document me and the changes going on for me too.

I'm also in Painting the Goddess Within eCourse, another wonderful offering by Sheri from Painting Herself into Being.  I only started this weekend so I'm a little behind...but I'm so looking forward to some magick for the art that they are teaching speaks to my inner Goddess and is totally in line with me wanting to Embrace the Divine Feminine; and Michael will be sharing some meditations too, which have been so powerful for me it's gonna be a yummy 6 months.

12 Months, 12 Mandalas, 12 Totem Animals...

I joined Guada's FREE Totem Animal Mandala challenge 2013...where she's teamed up with Jay from (get this) Moon-light-Creations! Where they create 12 Mandala and 12 Totem Animals one for each month this year...and guess what the animal is for January?  You guessed it....a Sea Turtle! Here's how I colored mine.

I'm also back in the FREE Book of Days an offering from Wild Soul Art with Effy...

who shared a wonderful FREE bookbinding video this New Year.  Once my migraines were gone I finally got a chance to watch them and make my own journals...I made one for my Art Journal and the other is my Spirit Notebook.

And lastly, a offering of my own... 

I've created some handmade new journals for my shop...to inspire you to journal your thought and your journey throughout 2013...perhaps you too would want to start a Spirit Notebook ♥

                                                                                                         

Life Book...a celebration and honouring of YOU!

I have enjoyed Life Book so much this year...it's been so such a healing journey, allowing my creativity to flow and grow.  I feel so blessed to have had the opportunity to learn from so many talented wonderful artists.

The lessons were intriguing and the techniques fun and amazing...

Although I didn't spend much time on the threads, in the little time I did spend there, I got to meet some wonderful artful souls.  I love the various interpretations to the lessons themselves...there was so much freedom to do your own twist on each.

I've learned much and healed even more through this wonderful Mix Media Art Life Book journey.  I've had a rough patch dealing with health stuff the past few months, so I'm a little behind, but I'm okay with that...I'm catching up and still enjoying every minute of it!

Life Book 2013 is now open for registration! 

I almost have enough saved up to join and I am once again sooo looking forward to it. Check it out Tam has a wonderful video sharing what to expect in Life Book 2013!  You don't have to be an artist to enjoy these lessons and the wonderful techniques shared ♥

Fall Leaves...Craft Project

For years, I have enjoyed finding new and different crafts to do during the various seasons to teach my little ones about nature.  So, I'm  always on the look out for fun projects.  I came across this fall leaf craft through the Parent Magazine online and thought it was perfect since we like love miracle walks and collecting gifts from the Earth to craft with...

Salt Dough leaf prints...

We started our project by collecting various sizes leaves and making sure they had good ridges on the back.  We noticed there were a lot of variations in the leaves, not only in sizes and colors but in smoothness too.   After warming up from our walk we started in on the dough.

I love Salt Dough 

It's to easy to make and so much fun to use.  I've used it in the past to make ornaments for our Yule Tree.  Here's the recipe we used...

Salt Dough Recipe:

2 cups flour
1/2 cup salt
3/4 - 1 cups water
some additional flour for kneading

Of course you can double the recipe if you want to make more.  We ended up with a wonderful soft dough which we rolled out and started cutting circles.  We used a variety of sizes...since we had different leaf sizes to accommodate.

Once we had the circles cut out, we pressed a leaf into each one

We put parchment paper a flat pan and laid each one down on it, popped them in the oven at 250 and backed them for 2-3 hours.  Pulled them out and let them cool.

Then the real fun began...

Out came Mom's acrylic paints, cos as I was told by my little one "I have the coolest paints ever":) and we started to paint our Autumn colors on our leaves.

Once they were dry we used some watered down brown paint so we could apply a wash over the leaf to make the veins of the leaves pop while still letting the beautiful Autumn colors come through.  We  let it dry a second time and then finished them off with a coat of glossy Mod Podge to seal it.

Walla beautiful Autumn Leaf Prints!

Thanks to "That Artist Women" for her wonderful instructions and inspiration :)