Death on a Triscuit

That's a West Wing line and a good description of how I woke up this morning. And so despite being absolutely vital to the work day - I could not get up. A 102 degree fever, exhaustion, coughing, congestion, weakness - I have been laying around all day. It is harder for me to NOT go to work, than to go, when I am sick. There were a lot of tears this morning.

I added ghee and eggs to the menu today - not just the egg yolks as prescribed. I really felt I needed the whole thing. I increased my tablespoons of fermented juice (aka sauerkraut juice). I tried raw ginger tea. I still can't taste a thing! And I still can't decide if I have the flu or if these are so-called die-off symptoms. Which apparently can look exactly like flu, complete with mucous buildup.

Because let's get real here, people. If you're reading this blog, you know me. And so yes - for sure - a good 47% of me thinks this whole thing is total junk science and absolute bunk. It's like fluoride being a brain poison. It's like a cayenne-lemon detox diet that shockingly helps you lose weight by not eating for 7 to 10 days (duh)!

But then, I have long followed the emerging science on gut bacteria. And I read articles like this one, from no-bullshit Michael Pollan (who also published a pate de choux recipe of ease this week, that torturer!). That is a long article but if you want to come up to speed on the gut biome, it is worth your time. It includes the sentence, and evidence to support:

• Medical science may be on the trail of a Grand Unified Theory of Chronic Disease, at the very heart of which we will find the gut microbiome.

Crazy! So I guess 53% of me, albeit skeptically, is willing to keep pushing through this, and see what can happen. Can one do a hard reset on their gut biome? Can I?

(From) (About) The Pulpit

So to begin: there is the religion I know about, and participate in. Here are a couple snippets from last week's service...

One. We began group prayer with the words, "God of many names, or of no name...". 

Two. The sermon was about salvation, and it began with a reflection that in this church, salvation does not mean accepting anyone, including Jesus, as a savior. Instead we reflected on the question, "What is saving your life right now?" 

And what has saved your life in the past? A friend, a lover, a lucky break, a well-timed joke, a job offer, a snowstorm that meant you could stay home for one blessed day when you needed it? And if we've been saved, often and unexpectedly and over and over again, is it possible that on a given day, we might be someone else's salvation - for that single day, of course, not for life. Or is it possible that once in while, we save ourselves through diligence, good works, forgiveness of our own mistakes? 

And is it even further possible that we might be saved from the roles we play, and the masks we wear, and thus that a saved life is one where we live authentically, where we live exactly as we are, where we get to BE who we are and meant to be and DO what we know we were put here to do... saved from fear and faking and pain.

And then to end: there is the religion I read about in the news. My good ol' Top Ten New York Times iPhone App strikes again with these two gems today:

Pastor Says He Is Sorry for Role in Newtown Service

Rob Morris, a Lutheran pastor in Newtown, Conn., violated a denominational rule when he took part in an interfaith prayer service after the Sandy Hook massacre.

Bishops Reject Contraceptive Proposal

The nation's Roman Catholic bishops on Thursday rejected the latest White House proposal on health insurance coverage of contraceptives, saying it did not offer enough safeguards for religious hospitals, colleges and charities that objected to providing such coverage for their employees. 

So please pardon me if I find mainstream religion completely out-of-touch with the life I lead, the spiritual and religious life I pursue. And frankly, laughable right now. Who are these people? Who do they think they'll appeal to in the next three, five, fifteen years? Maybe I would laugh a little less and understand a little more if I could worship with them to a god of no name, and strive together to love both ourselves and others, as we/they are. But these headlines tonight make me feel silly about even pursuing such noble goals and dejected about any possible collaborative progress. 

Top of the list; bottom of the list.

I wake up every day, and do three things even before I get up to pee. First, I check my work BlackBerry with one eye open. Then I check my personal email with both eyes open but unfocused. Then I look at the Top Ten news stories at New York Times.com, as ranked on the iPhone app, and sometimes take the full articles - not just headlines - with me for breakfast and during the morning routine.

The Top Ten on the iPhone is a blend of stories from different news sections - mostly "Top News" but a little bit of Style section, New York Regional headlines and even a Dining + Wine well-read selection from time to time.

The other morning, the first story on the list was about how the United States' military branches have had an average of one suicide per day among currently enlisted folks in 2012. That is, by the way, more than the number of people lost in combat in 2012 so far. They're killing themselves faster than they're being killed by enemy fire.

The story at the very bottom of the list was about high-end real estate agents in New York City, and what apartments they would recommend - and why - in the $30 million-and-up-price-range.

Sometimes I hate my own country. Sometimes I really, REALLY hate it.

The Perception Gap

Just want to pass along that handy term for your next dinner party or stimulating intellectual discussion. It's from a David Ropeik op-ed in the Times, and he says:

... Our risk perception system, which blends thinking and feeling and mostly takes place subconsciously, often produces fears that fly in the face of the facts. Many of us are more afraid of some risks — like mercury or pesticides or genetically modified food — than the evidence warrants. And many of us aren’t as concerned about some really dire dangers as we ought to be, like climate change, particulate pollution or acidification of the ocean. The problem is, being too afraid, or not afraid enough — a phenomenon I call “the perception gap” — produces dangers all by itself. For that reason, it’s worth exploring just why our fears don’t match the facts, as a first step toward protecting ourselves from the real dangers that arise when we get risk wrong.

Some of us, ahem, miiiiight have mothers and grandmothers who routinely display (or displayed) bold illustrations of this perception gap.

And it miiiiight be influencing our own daily fears, and is worth thinking about - either doing more research and less seeking of validation, as Ropeik suggests, but also, for me, being aware of the very real consequences of long-term low-level stress, and long-term low-level fight-or-flight decision-making.

Food for thought... 'tis better to make peace with my daily choices and live calmly, than to warmly welcome my existing facts-and-feelings perception gaps, nurturing them to my own detriment...

News Round-Up, Version N.Y.T.

Good morning! It's news time.

I think my friend Nikola ghost-wrote this.

And they wrote this article solely for my friend Micheal, who already heats his bedroom with his supercomputer during the cold chunks of the year.

This one is for my cousin, for both the insight into GF food and the marketing of an international company.

I already sent this to Meg but it's really good, and Lemon would like it too.

There are two for Meggie - one that's op-ed and national and one that's news and local (47 kids in an algebra class!?!?).

And as this article sadly says, "Sometimes the story that science tells us isn’t the story we want to hear." My husband the pragmatist, my husband the unsentimental, my husband the striving pianist - this article is for him.

So I read a lot of news, but I think about everyone while I do it!