Chapter 110: Broken Into Thousand Pieces

"Jack..."
"What happened?"

She cried for minutes, and I waited patiently. She is a youth who used to share secret with me. And I become a "place" for her to release her sorrow.



"I felt that my life always face criticism. I am so sad."
"Tell me what exactly happened?" I asked.

"Even my parents discouraged me and always put me to shame in front of others."
"What did they say?"

Readers, I kinda agree with the point that some parents (whether in purpose or not) always put their own children to shame. They discouraged the children and destroy their own children's reputation. This is very dangerous. It will in fact make their children disrespect them and hate them even more. However, I do not understand one thing, "Why did some parents destroy their children's reputation? And when the children rebel against them, they will say 'My children are very rude to me and always go against me!'"


Parents need to be careful of their words and actions. Unnoticedly, the children will hate their parents for life. Before they complained about their children's rebellions, they must think why their children acted in that way. The parents must indeed be responsible in what they had said and done to their children. They must be a good model for their children. Sorry, no offence... Some parents are really ridiculous!

Some parents (especially the Chinese) normally put their children into shame when they were having conversation with others, by saying to others...
"My son is very stupid."
"Wow! Your daughter is beautiful. But my daughter is very ugly."
"Look at your son, he is brillant. But my son is stupid."
"She know nothing, very useless one."
"Ha ha ha... Sorry, my friend. My daughter's hair is very ugly, right?"
"My son is a lazy pig. Always sleep. He knows nothing."

...or saying this to children
"Why is your hair so ugly?
"Why are you so ugly?"
"So stupid! So useless!"
"Look at your cousin. Why are you so stupid?"
"Very stubborn child. Always quarrel with me!"
"I tell you shut up! I am your mother (father)."
"Stop talking to me. Whatever I say is correct."

...or saying this to others when they are in the wrong (to cover their shame).
"Sorry. I am late because of my stupid child."
"Sorry. My son bah! Very stupid! Always make mistakes!"

...or saying this to their children when they rebel.
"What have I done wrong to my children? Why are they so stubborn?"
"I have many useless children. None of you wanna help me."
"Now you grow up, you leave me alone. You do not love me anymore."
"In future, when you have children, you will understand how I feel."
"Why am I suffering so much? You all are really useless!"
"No one understands me. I am so stressed and tired. And you children keep on giving me problems."

I am not critizing about "parents". I hope the parents will understand their children. Even though parents play importantly in supporting the family, even though parents might be stressed in their own lives, even though parents might have sad moments, PLEASE DO NOT HURT CHILDREN'S FEELING. It is not worth it when you have your children hating you. In conclusion, children are NOT toys. They need to be cared and loved. They are HUMAN! They publicly shamed their own children, do they know that the reputation of their children will be destroyed entirely? Where is their praise and compliments?


I show compassion towards this miserable girl. I truly understand how she felt. Her heart has broken into thousand pieces. All I can do is to ask my Heavenly Father to heal her wounds. As a brother in Christ, I comforted her by saying...

"My friend, you are precious in God's eyes. God will not put you to shame. Jesus loves you."

Ephesians 6:4
"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

Chapter 23: Unexpected

Written on 8 February 2009

5 February was really my busy day. From Monday to Thursday, I had not stopped doing research about my studies. I am doing nine subjects for this semester: New Testament, World Religion, Hebrews Language, History of Christianity, Homiletics, Asian Church Music, Research Methodology, Music Theory, and Field Education (Research on Weekly performance in church). Altogether, I have more than 5000 pages to read in order to fulfill the task of the reading program. It is a compulsory program, considered as one of the assignments. Once I accomplish my reading program, the chances of passing the subjects will be higher.

On 5 February, I woke up at 6am to revise “Romans”; 7:40am New Testament class; 8:35am Research Methodology; 9:30am Assembly for STS students; 11am Research on world religion; 12:30pm lunch time. Wow! I was so glad to return back home during lunch time. Immediately, without hesitation, SHOWER first! After the shower, I went into my room, drying my hair, sitting down on bed, preparing to study World Religion, taking up my phone. Then I saw a SMS…


“…our grandma just passed away today…”

A long period of silence… Staring at the SMS, and read it a few times… Heart pumping fast… “No! It’s too sudden! It’s too…”

Unexpected…?

7 February 2009 was my grandma’s funeral service. That’s the first time I experience that one of my relatives passed away. My mother was mourning bitterly, profusely… I was standing besides her, giving her the most caring support; comforting, hugging my mother. This is also the first time that I saw my mother mourning so bitterly. When I looked at my grandma in the coffin, tears just filled up my whole eyes, though it didn’t drop. My mother kept on talking to her mother, lying dead in coffin. I really had nothing to say. My youngest sister was patting on my left shoulder when she saw the tears in my eyes.

Ephesians 6:1 – 2
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this right. ‘Honor your father and mother’ – which is the first commandment with a promise.”

My mother and her sisters were regretting that they didn’t spend much time with their mother, though they love her dearly. From that time onwards, I truly understand what it means “spending quality time with parents”.



Readers, we only have one mother who gives birth to us. We only have one father whom we share the same family blood type. Please cherish our parents whenever we have time to accompany them. Don’t focus on our life too personally. Our parents need us too. From now, I will always give most of my time to my parents especially my mother whenever I have a chance to meet them. As you know my life, studying and serving at same time, my time with my parents is scarce. Whenever there’s a chance to meet them, that quality time with my parents is absolutely precious to me.

Heavenly Father, thanks for being with us all the time, even though sometimes we only look for our own interests. God, forgive us for sometimes we ignored Your presence.

Praise the Lord for your parents are still nagging and scolding you now.

Cherish these precious moments.
Cherish our father and mother.