Superhero Media: Kirby Planet Robobot

First up, Kirby Planet Robobot is the most blatantly anti-capitalist video game I have ever played. Yes, I've never played Disco Elysium or Cookie Clicker, but the Kirby series is published by Hal and Nintendo and is aimed primarily at children. Suffice to say I wasn't expecting it when the reveal came that the antagonists of Planet Robobot were an evil corporation working for a supercomputer/elder god looking to control the universe through capitalism. Even the character of Suzie, who helps Kirby out towards the end of the game, isn't looking to stop Star Dream, but to control it for herself to make more money than she is now. But I'm getting ahead of myself, the game begins when a massive machine descends on Pop Star and starts to industrialise the landscape. Of course, Kirby was sleeping when it all went down, but now that he's awake, a lot of robots are about to be eaten. Kirby Planet Robobot is considered one of the best games in the Kirby series, and it's pretty easy to see why, as it's a hell of a lot of fun, even before you get to the parts where Kirby dons goggles and a leather helmet and starts piloting a mech with his face on it.

If I had one complaint, it's that Planet Robobot is a little brief, I finished the main game in a couple of days, but that's par for the course with Kirby games these days, sadly. As much as these games are made for younger players, I really feel there needs to be something like a New Game Plus mode or an extra world or two after the main story, rather than the additional mini-games which tend to be pretty mixed in terms of quality. Like many Kirby games, the ultimate boss of the adventure, Star Dream, has a Lovecraftian bent to it, despite looking like it just walked out of a Disney film, being a giant supercomputer that is intent on turning the entire universe into product that it can buy and sell for profit, growth-based capitalism taken to an absurd final extent. Opposing Star Dream, and Haltzmann and Suzie before him, the more feudalistic Meta Knight and King Dedede are overcome and incorporated into the machine (literally and figuratively) quite easily, whilst Kirby remains stubbornly agrarian, possibly even anarchistic in the face of corporate colonialism and cannot be stopped.

Now, I don't for a minute think that Masahiro Sakurai was intending Planet Robobot to be an entry-level treatise on Agrarian Anarchism as a reaction against Free Market Capitalism, but it's really hard to not read the game in those terms. Seeing the pastoral beauty of Dream Land overrun by sharp metal and hard edges is pretty shocking to a longtime fan like me, evoking Shiver Star from Kirby 64 as the poor Waddle-dees become more and more mechanical as the game progresses. In many ways, Planet Robobot feels like a sequel to Kirby 64, with locations like Shiver Star being a possible previous stop for Star Dream and even the game-play feeling like a natural development of what came before. If you've never played a Kirby game, Planet Robobot is a great effort, being a hell of a lot of fun and featuring probably the best Kirby cinematics outside of a Smash Bros game. Sadly, it's hard to get your hands on, as most people aren't moving on their beloved copies and it's been long out of print. Actually, on that, why are Kirby games so hard to get your hands on? If they popped up in the eShop, I'd be grabbing everything I can get and covering them here at some stage.

Force S5 - Part IV

So now that we understand the core concepts of Force S5, let's break down the Turn Sequence and how Combat is resolved.

As discussed before, play in Force S5 proceeds by placing a die (D6) in a bag or container for each member of a force, ideally dice of different colours but similar sizes to prevent cheating. Remove a die from the container, the player who's team the corresponds to nominates a model, rolls D3, then the model may perform that many Actions. After those actions are resolved, draw another die and continue play until all the dice have been drawn. Pretty standard across several games on the market, with the usual caveats of not being able to activate the same model twice or pass an Action. Pull a die, roll D3, perform that many Actions with a nominated model. Easy.

The Actions a model can perform are discussed below. Unless otherwise noted, a model may perform an Action any amount of times, so yes, if you roll 3 on your D3, you can Shoot three times. Actions are declared one at a time, so you can see how one resolves before deciding on the next. Remember, Force S5 is a silly game meant to be fun, so always err on the side of what will be more enjoyable for all players involved. 

Move - The model is moved in any direction 3"
Shoot - Make a Ranged Attack against an eligible target
Fight - Make a Melee Attack against an eligible target
Charge - Make a Move action that ends in base contact with an enemy Model
Hunker - When within 1" of a terrain feature, Shift Up Defense Dice
Dodge - Shift Up the model's Defense Dice
Focus - Shift Up the model's Attack Dice
Power - Use a Power
Interact - This is a catch-all Action used to claiming Objectives and interacting with terrain

As you can see, no ideas there that are going to light the Miniature Wargames world on fire, just pretty basic concepts that have been around a lot. Next, let's break down what all the terms introduced above mean;

Movement: Models are intended to be moving in short, sharp bursts, not making huge dashes across open fields, so it's recommended that you don't clutter a table with lots of ladders and climbable walls. To help smooth this out, Movement is the one action that can be "chained", so a player may declare multiple Moves before making them and measure up ladders and over barricades. For the purposes of Force S5, a model may cross obstacles that are shorter than them.

Ranged Attacks: The specifics of making an attack and dealing damage will be covered later, but for now, to make a legal Ranged Attack a model must have Line of Sight to the target. Force S5 uses "True Line of Sight", so a model must be able to "see" part of its target to make a Ranged Attack. It will be covered again later, but in Force S5, Ranged weapons have no maximum distance, they can shoot across the table.

Melee Attacks: To be eligible to make a Melee Attack, a model must be in base-to-base contact with its target. All Melee Weapons can only be used in base-to-base contact unless otherwise stated.

Charge: When making a Move action, a model may not get within 1" of an enemy model. It is only by making the Charge action that they may enter base-to-base contact. Unlike other miniatures games, performing a Charge action does not grant a "free" Melee action, you must have enough actions left.

Hunker: Being behind something solid isn't enough to avoid incoming fire in Force S5, you must make a choice to dig in. A model can only make a Hunker action when within 1" of a terrain piece, and may not make an action after doing a Hunker. Whilst Hunkered, a model's Defense is Shifted Up. Hunker lasts until the model makes a Move or Charge action. Hunker may not be stacked and does not combine with Dodge.

Dodge: Sometimes things don't go to plan and a model can be caught in the open, looking down the barrel of a gun. A Dodge Action Shifts Up a Model's Defense, but only for the next Attack (ranged or Melee) directed at it. Dodge lasts until the model makes a Move or Charge action. Dodge may not be stacked and does not combine with Hunker.

Focus: A model making a Focus action Shifts Up the dice on its next Attack (Melee or Ranged). Focus may not be stacked and cannot be used in subsequent turns, it must be used on the next Action.

Power: Some models will have powers, I'm still writing that part though. Use this Action to use a Power.

Interact: Use this action to claim Objectives, operate computer panels, open and close doors, etc.

Ok, so this one just became about rules sorry, not much room left for some background to the setting. To make up for that, the next entry will just be fun fluff and me messing around with UFO and conspiracy tropes, deal?

Superhero Media: Transmetropolitan

Run down the street like a motherfucker! Warren Ellis' seminal work for the DC Vertigo Imprint, Transmetropolitan is a political, cyberpunk, anarchic, drug-fulled, journalistic rampage in comic book form. Starring Spider Jerusalem, the mutant offspring of Hunter S. Thompson and Woodward and Burnstien; a freelance journalist working for a major city newspaper, speaking truth to power and cramming as many drugs into his body as he can manage. Assisting him are Yelana, his assistant, and Channon, a bodyguard and former stripper. After covering the American election, Spider and his "Filthy Assistants" find themselves entangled in a Presidential conspiracy of murder, corruption and genocide. When it came out, Transmetropolitan was wild, transgressive and radical, a call to arms against the powers that be. As much as I love the story, and think that it's brilliantly written, reading it again in 2021, far more radical myself than I was when I first discovered Spider Jerusalem, the whole thing is a bit of a let down.

Now, holding older media to current standards is always fraught, though not necessarily wrong, and from what I currently know of Warren Ellis, I certainly wouldn't accuse him of being a reactionary apologist, or anti-trans or racist, but I feel there are legitimate criticisms of Transmetropolitan that are not really being covered. So before I get into the negative, I really want to say that I have loved Transmetropolitan, and highly recommend it for anyone trying to get into comics but doesn't fancy superheroes. The story is strong, it has a lot to say and the characters are brilliant, it well deserves your time and much of the praise it gets. 10/10 Would read again. However... there are things. Thinks like the Transients being pretty hard to read as anything other than an allegory for Queer persons, particularly Genderqueer persons, and they're really not well represented. Again, I don't think this is some deliberate bigotry on Ellis's part, but as Fred Christ is the only Transient character with much panel time, and is a sex predator and con-artist, it doesn't read well as an allegory.

The primary antagonist of the series, President Gary Callaghan, is also baffling, as he's a sexually stunted sociopath who wants to rule so that he can make people suffer, which is fine, that sounds pretty accurate to me. What's odd is that Callaghan is a Democrat. Now, being an Anarchist, I really don't feel allegiance to any political party, especially one based in a country in which I don't live, but just what is the criticism being leveled at the Democratic party? Callaghan is a sex pest, so is it about Clinton? He looks a lot like Jimmy Carter, but nothing he does is reminiscent of anything Carter is typically criticised for, so any attempt at commentary is muddled. Despite the fact Callaghan and his opposite number, The Beast, are both horrible people seeking power for power's sake, there is not criticism in Transmetropolitan of the system that facilitates them, putting the blame for all governmental ills on the one person. There's also a weird sub-plot on child prostitution that goes nowhere that I personally find so jarring that I skip it in my re-reads these days.

Transmetropolitan is flawed, perhaps deeply so, but it remains a high watermark in comics as a political and socially conscious medium. If the lack of any POC or Queer characters is the kind of thing to turn you off, I really can't blame you, but it may be worth pushing through that to read this series. Some of the choices and stances are baffling, but the stream-of-consciousness style of Spider's columns are endlessly charming and engrossing. The world presented is an utterly unique blend of hyper-realism, cyberpunk and trans-humanism, but at the same time, feels completely familiar. There are many theses worth of content in Transmetropolitan to be parsed out for those willing to dive in, be it in the form of literary analysis, criticisms through Queer or Feminist lenses, or even just discussing how much Royce is amazing and deserves his own mini-series. Across ten trades, Transmetropolitan is pretty strong, keeping the same artist and writer in a manner most of these series don't manage. There's always talk of a television or film adaptation in the works, and whilst I would like to see that, I just hope it's more like The Boys, in that it gets updated and some of the worse elements polished away.

A Tribute to Artie Simek

If you're a fan of Silver Age comics, then there's a decent chance that you've seen the work of Artie Simek, a prolific Letterer for both Marvel and DC in the 1950s and '60s. Not the most celebrated member of the famous Marvel Bullpen, you don't really hear Simek get mentioned in the same breath as Lee and Kirby, or even Ditko or Sterenko, but odds are, if you own a Marvel comic from the 1960s (real or reprint), Simek worked on it. For those who don't know, Lettering was the job in which someone had to write all the letters on every page of a comic before typesetting was advanced enough to handle the speed and precision that comics needed. Seriously, look at a page of just about any comic from the era and imagine having to hand print every single letter, often quickly because of the time pressure to get issues out, then imagine doing work, often uncredited, on almost every issue of Marvel Comics.

Look, I'm not going to make this a piece about how early comics staff were exploited, we all know that, and Simek passed away in 1975, so getting mad at people who are mostly dead for doing what was standard in the industry at the time, even if it was grossly unfair, because it's kind of pointless at the end of the day. Instead, let's just take some time to appreciate a man who contributed so much to a medium we love. As well as lettering probably hundreds of classic comics, including most of the Lee/Kirby run of Fantastic Four, Simek is the guy who did most of the large sound effect balloons and had a hand in designing the famous Banner Titles on the covers of comics, including Fantastic Four and Marvel Two-In-One. In many ways, Simek contributed to the iconic look of many Marvel comics as much as Kirby, Ditko and the bullpen of artists churning out 12 cent funny books back in the day.

So do I have a broader point with all this? Yes and no. I think it's important to cover the lesser-known people who worked on comics back in the days when the medium was coming together and building the foundations that would eventually lead to them dominating the world of entertainment. Lettering is something that you probably don't consider all that much when reading an old comic, and whilst we can't retroactively make things better for Simek and those like him, appreciating the work that they did a little more is worthwhile. Lettering must have been a crummy job, hunched over a desk in his bedroom in Queens, but Simek was evidently a really jovial and friendly guy, working right up to the end bringing to live a form of entertainment that was considered juvenile and disposable right up until well into my own lifetime, but that people loved and internalised to a degree that has brought it into the fore half a century later. Damn impressive if you ask me.

Superhero Media: Tron Evolution

Well this particular piece of Tron media took me a while, but that's only because Tron Evolution is a terrible game and I kept putting it down in disgust. I know I don't normally review gameplay and design when I look at Video Games here, focusing instead upon narrative and character, but Tron Evolution was so clunky and poor to play that it really was my main take away from my experience. Set on what I can best describe as the Tron version of "The Night of the Long Knives", when Clu makes a grab for power, starts slaughtering the Isos and attempts to kill Flynn. Now, as far as stories for a Tron video game go, that's a pretty solid pitch, add to that the presence of Olivia Wilde and Bruce Boxleitner in voice roles and the game had real potential to be something great. But there is just this cascade of poor choices discernible behind Tron Evolution that sucks any joy out of the finished product. For starters, the protagonist is 'The Monitor', a security program with no dialogue and no personality.

Why aren't I playing as Tron? Seriously, you have Boxleitner in the recording booth and I'm fighting Clu for most of the game, why isn't Tron the protagonist? It really wouldn't have been more than a narrative and dialogue change, so why am I 'The Monitor', who, spoiler alert for a PS3 game, dies at the end of the game, when Clu being captured and turned into Rinzler would have had more impact? Secondly, clearly a great deal of effort has gone into depicting the landscapes and buildings of the Grid, but you never really get to explore it, instead using parkour to get from one fight to the next and only really seeing anything interesting in background. Sections where you get to drive a Lightcycle or Light Tank are interesting, but the controls are wonky and the sections are, again, very linear. Hell, there's not even a light-cycle battle at any stage, which is just a waste of the setting and history of the franchise. Seeing the events that lead to Tron Legacy played out is great, but without any real engagement with the setting, it doesn't feel grounded and any impact is lost.

I know Tron is a weird franchise to want more and better versions of, but as we've discussed here previously, I think there's a great deal to be found within what's there. Tron is antifascist, it's anti-corporate, it's Dionysian and it's radical in a way few family films, especially those made by Disney, tend to be. The narrative is heroic, though in terms of talent, not destiny, with Flynn's intellect and skills at video games being what enables him to defeat Master Control. It's odd that one of the best film series about video games doesn't have a whole series of video game tie-ins, as it's an immediate excuse to get around ludonarrative dissonance, has an iconic look and a banging soundtrack by Daft Punk. Oh yeah, Tron Evolution doesn't use the Daft Punk music, but some odd sound-alike version which is pretty terrible, again, what an odd choice given what was available. Hopefully there is more for Tron, Clu and Flynn in the future, hopefully better than this and hopefully not too far away.

Playing Marvel United

Well I'm way behind on getting to this one, but I finally got a chance to play Marvel United, a board game series that I probably would have collected pretty hard if I hadn't found Unmatched. Thankfully, I have a gaming friend with poor impulse control who works for a rival FLGS, and he seems to have plenty for us to mess around with. For those that don't know, Marvel United is a cooperative board game featuring almost every Marvel superhero you can probably think of. The minis are "SD" or chibi style and different enemies change up how the game flows.

So, of course, for the first game, I picked the best Avenger, Hawkeye (Clint Barton) as Hawkeye (Kate Bishop) wasn't available and there isn't a heroic version of Doctor Doom currently available.

See, they're pretty cute, right? I'm not sure I'd want to paint an entire set in that cartoony style, and some look better than others, but that's definitely Clint Barton. I probably would have liked a more Fraction/Aja version in tracksuit pants and a bandaged face, but I won't be mistaking him for anyone else.

Our first game was against Ultron, who kicked our butts, but that may have been my fault, as I didn't know how the game worked and kept saying "this looks bad" and calling everyone "bro". But the great thing about games like Marvel United though, is that we can reset and get going again quickly.

This time, I decided to play Jessica Jones, who looks pretty naff really, but I guess that'll happen when you don't really have a costume. We did better that game, against Onslaught of all people, narrowly losing on the last couple of card flips, which tends to happen with these kind of games.

For the final round, against Loki, I played as Blade, with the rest of the team being Squirrel Girl, Howard the Duck and Shadowcat, which turned out to be a pretty brutal combination, except poor Kitty, and we mopped up the God of Mischief in short order. Marvel United is a lot of fun, though I probably prefer other co-op games like the D&D series, Sentinels of the Multiverse or Pandemic. The minis are cute, but not really usable for other games, unlike my Unmatched characters. If you wanted a fun collection and a game to play with friends that scratches your obscure Marvel character itch (there's Alpha Flight!), then this is probably the game for you.

Superhero Media: Kirby's Adventure

Although I don't review all that many video games on here, I am conscious of the fact that there is really only so far back I can go with the medium. The 1990s saw dozens of superhero-themed "brawlers" released to consoles and arcades, but most lack any real story, so I don't see myself ever bothering with them here. As they are intended as a lead-in for younger gamers, the Kirby series tend to be pretty light on story in general, but the earliest ones especially don't have a lot going on. I can't see ever covering Kirby's Dream Land for example, as the game is really short and the narrative is essentially "King Dedede steals all the food, so Kirby goes to get it back". The reason I actually want to cover Kirby's Adventure (from the Nintendo Entertainment System), is that it is basically the origin of many of the narrative elements that would go on to define the series for years to come. Kirby "lore" is surprisingly deep, but only really between the lines, as there is a lot there, but a great deal of it has to be teased out. For this game, a creature known as Nightmare arrives in Dream Land, and it's up to Kirby to save the day, especially as Dedede has absconded with the Star Rod.

Who and what is Nightmare? Well, that's not super clear, it seems to be a manifestation of the concept of nightmares? And it's come to Dream Land because, at this stage, Dream Land is directly linked to dreams, rather than just being the name of a region on planet Pop Star. Or is it? Here the odd nature of Kirby canon can be a real boon to writing games and scenarios as well as an annoying issue. Perhaps Dream Land could be something like Marvel's Siege Perilous or Nexus of All Realities? That would explain why Kirby, the infant Star Warrior has arrived there rather than anywhere else in the universe, and why Elder Gods, Machine Intelligences and Planet-eaters keep turning up. Kirby's Adventure is also the first appearance (essentially) of Meta-Knight, the last Star Warrior, who is a nasty boss, but is also clearly trying to help and mentor Kirby through parts of the game. Even Dedede has shifted to more of a "friendly rival" stance, with his stealing of the Star Rod being his wrongheaded attempt to keep it away from Nightmare.

If any of this lore and worldbuilding sounds interesting, just be careful before you jump right on YouTube and start searching because, of course, adult men have read way too much into the Kirby games and there are plenty of Lovecraftian takes on what lore is there. And, look, I have enjoyed that kind of thing in the past, and will probably go to that well with my own Ultimate Alliance narratives and games in the future, but the entire concept is a little silly, like a "dark and edgy" reboot of The Smurfs or something. The Kirby series works really well as it is, and takes very little readjusting to fit in with something like Guardians of the Galaxy or Ratchet & Clank, so even if you want the Annihilation Wave or Lady Styx invading Pop Star, you could probably pull it off, though I don't like their chances. Seriously, Kirby has killed Elder Gods, Annihilus is just fucking done if he takes on Dream Land. I wish we got more of these games, or at least the older ones were easier to get a hold of.