Resolutions for 2005

Well i seem to be REALLY amiss in keeping up with this blog. I think it comes from just having the blah's here recently. I wasn't really "into" Christmas this year and i am not sure why.

All said and done, my son was happy and that was the most important thing. Even though he doesn't understand about Santa, gifts, etc... I wonder how long i can get that too last?

So my New Year's Resolution's will be:

* find a new job (one that doesn't make me cranky and that i can do while still be home all day with my son. Money would be nice to. While i hate hate hate my current job, i make ALOT.)

* start "Angels Dwell Here" as a gift for MIL

* find a way to purchase Lanarte's Venetian Mask and start for my sis

* Lose some weight! (the minute my doctor told me i was pregnant, my body skipped to the 9th month. )

* Try to enjoy life a little more

That's about it. I could go on about acquiring more stash and trying to weed out the stuff i won't use, but why state the obvious? I know i will buy lots more in 2005 and i will have a hard time parting with anything i have...as someday i make like it again and stitch it!

Have a great New Year everyone!

STITCHING RELATED!

I have basically stopped stitching on everything, but this Caring Wings piece for my DH's cousin. I have 4 weeks and 4 days to get it done so i have to buckle down and just stitch it. It isn't that i haven't enjoyed the piece, i just have been working on my RR pieces and my model piece. So i have been working on her non-stop for the last week and she is coming along. She is really quite nice to stitch. Especially now that i have changed the DMC gold metallic (YUCK-O) to the Kreinik #4 braid in a slightly brighter color. I am liking this much more. I cannot stand stitching with the DMC metallic. I don't know why but that stuff hates me. It goes in ten different directions and always looks sloppy to me.

I will post a picture soon. Right now i am working on the halo and the right side of the piece. I am saving the beading for last. I may regret this as she has quite a few beads, but my DS loves to look at the piece and give a couple pats whenever he sees me working on it. So i worry that some beads will come off. It is like he is saying "Ok now be good for mommy".

LISTS

Boy, I haven't updated this site in a while. I really never meant for that to happen. I will tell you that things are pretty much the same. I am still pregnant, sick, tired, but thrilled to be pregnant. I seem to be suffering from insomnia too, which some people say is a part of pregnancy. I am inclined to believe that since nothing in this pregnancy is the same as my last. I am still enjoying it though. I don't know how my son will react to a new addition, especially since he is VERY attached to his mother. I am sure that this is going cause a lot of tension in the house for a little bit. We will have to be aware of his feelings and make sure to spend time with him as well so he doesn't feel neglected. Although my DH says he is the most spoiled child on the plant! I don't agree, i think he is just a 16 month old boy who is lucky enough to have both of his parents available pretty much whenever he needs us. Ahhh the benefits of working differents shifts. I just hope that my son is talking some when the baby comes. I know that boys come along slower in the verbal area and he is SO VERY VERY active so i know he is a normal boy. He has his own language and communicates his needs to us pretty easily, but some words would be nice.

The title of this post is lists. Why you wonder? Well i will be the first to admit that i am an odd person. I LOVE to list. I have lists about everything my book collection, books i want, stash i want, etc. I have very intricate lists as well. My book list is alphabetical by author and then by title. My wishlist for books is on Amazon and i have two. *sheepish* One list is public and contains books that i need for finishing off collections by a certain author or authors i want to try. The second list is HUGE. I will admit it! It contains all the books i want and trust me even though at last count i had 5,989 books in my collection, there are 1,409 others that i want. If DH knew he would faint. But i read a book or so a day and i am not the type of person to read a book once and then never go back to it. I don't have books in my collection that i don't like, unless i am collecting a particular author and they happen to write something that is...ehh...not to my taste, but i am admit about having complete collections. I have read everything that i own at least once and i have read somethings several times. I remember the stories, but i love the re-visiting of a tale. If i get a book and i don't like it i donate it to the library. I would sell it, but in all honesty i feel i don't get a lot for it anyways, why not let it benefit someone else. I know why don't i just check books out and read them, well i have problems giving them back. I want to own the book. I remember passages from books and like to go back and re-read scenes or whole books if i am all of the sudden struck with the notion. My DH gets a bit frustrated because i always am bemoaning the fact that NO ONE (ok aside from a really good friend she understands and my sister who just gives in to get me to shut up) gets me what i ask for on my birthday and holidays. Yes even him. One year he did, but then he went on to say that he was my husband and his gift needed to be special. I can't get people to understand that i don't put these things on my wishlist as a mere suggestion, i put it on there because i truly want to receive them! He says that it is boring to give books. To me that is one of the best gifts i could get. If he wants to be special he can get me more than everyone else. :-) Of course at this point that would be just a book.

Then there is the list for my stash. At one point this list was HUGE. Then a small disaster took care of 75% of my collection and well now i haven't sorted through all that is left, but i created a blog for what i have. My list for what i want while a small small part is on my wishlist blog that is by no absolute means all that i want. I think that it looks greedy for me to put everything i want, plus it really is mainly for my own personal knowledge. I love making the lists of what i want. My true wishlist is in excel, it contains the chart info, floss needed, if it can be bought kitted up, from where, the place to get the best deal, etc. I constantly go over it and update it. Of course i have had to add a lot back in after losing these charts. Which was fun at first, but then just became sad to think of all that i lost. It was weird shopping with the little bit of the insurance money we got for it, because i kept thinking i had the chart, but then i had to remind myself not anymore. I don't remember everything that i have, but i do recall a lot of it.

Recently i being the weird person i am, went to one of my favorite online shops and just added everything that i would ever want from then to the cart to see what the damage would be. When i say everything i mean everything, charts, floss and whatnot for the charts if the shop was offering to kit it with everything, fabrics i would love to have, gadets, etc. I mean it was a HUGE cart. Am i the only one to have ever done this? I looked at the total and while it was up there ($8,707.66) that too me wasn't too too much especially since i was getting a TON. I then wondered what would that shop do if that got an actual order like that? Would they keel over from shock? I wonder what is the biggest online order that a person (not a shop or business owner dealing in this) has ever made. I myself have placed orders for $350-400 before and that wasn't for a Chatelaine kit (which this site didn't offer but if it did i think we could safely raise that total to $10,000 since i seem to want everything she has ever done). I would love to ask one of them, but i know they are busy and don't have time for such drival. But one day when i win some sort of lotto (my fortune said that i will inherite a fortune in an unexpected way!) i will try the theroy out. Although if i ever managed to stitch even half of what i order i think i should be in some sort of Guiness Record book. My kids would probably think mommy was batty and what to do with all of the stuff i have left behind.

I have a clause in my will though...my stash has to go to someone who will use it and appreciate it whether it is one of my children or a friend, it cannot be sold off. I hope that i have a little girl that will take this hobby on and start appreciating the journey of the needle. I certainly have plenty for a little girl to fall in love with!

SO EXCITED!

I just found out today, that my best friend in the entire world is pregnant and due the week before i am! How completely and utterly cool that is for her and her new husband of 3 months. ;-). I wish she lived closer to me, but i am so excited to know that some one as wonderful as her will be bringing a new little one into the world. She will be such a great mom!

So a big hug and congrats to my wonderful friend, Mariah!

As some of you may or may not of known, I am pregnant. I am only about 5 weeks along, but i am definitely feeling the effects of this one. I am SO very very nauseous and tired! I am so tired I fell asleep in the bathroom here at work with my head on the TP holder. Sad, isn't it? Of course this was after i had just finished re-living my snack. Fortunately i didn't use the rim to fall asleep on. I seem to be way more nauseous with this pregnancy than i was with the last one. I know that i am so tired due to my work/lack of sleep schedule. With my first child i would work and then sleep 16 hours and then go back to work. This time i work, stay up until my hubbie gets home sleep maybe 2 or 3 hours and then back to work. *sigh* Definitely wearing on me.

I know most people don't say anything until they are 3 months along, but so many people kept asking and you know how hard it is to keep a secret like this! I am terrible at it myself. So we told people. Plus here at work they were bound to find out, we work the farthest imaginable from the bathroom and i am running for it every time i breath in it seems. So i think they guessed after the first two days of this. If i am not peeing all the time i am throwing up. I love being pregnant, but i could do without this extreme nausea.

I have been working on a post to write for a few days, but in all honesty i am now drawing a blank! That drives me crazy! I have had quite a few finishes in the last few days. I finished my piece for Beth's American theme for the Open RR i am in. I have also just about finished my golf piece for Bobbie Jo's section in the Open RR. Yes, early! I need to get some of these projects out of here to make way for the Caring Wings piece that has to be done by the 17th of Dec for my hubbie's cousin. I haven't stitched on it in quite some time and i need to get hopping on it. Also with my birthday approaching at the end of the month i wanted to have some time to do somethings for myself. Did you know that in all the years i have been stitching i haven't done a single piece for myself or my hubbie? I have plenty of patterns i want to do for myself or him, but i just seem to keep commiting myself to other things. I MUST GET A HANDLE ON THAT! I just can't seem to stop.

It is the same with my spending habits. I am in some serious territory here. I want the big picture, but i can't focus past the picture of now! The whole reason behind getting an apartment for this long was to lower our cc debt. Well my DH has done a great job of that, me *sigh* i have not. I have paid one off (only because i called and closed it), but i cannot stop it seems something is always coming up. My DS is sick, my horse needs a new blanket, new patterns just calling my name whistfully! I can't help myself. I need to commit myself to some sort of shoppers anon! Now with Halloween and Christmas coming up, oh golly that is my season and i have the biggest issues with not buying decorations then. This has to be a disease!

I went through some of my lists of previous stash (before fire) and i had six patterns fully kitted (fabric, floss, beads, sparklies, etc) in double. Now that is a bit out of control. Now my stash is sadly much much smaller and i can see it all. I have the horrible urges (especially at night when i am working and the hubbie is sleeping) to click, click, click my way into some more delightful stash! People in my family never seem to buy what i ask for for my birthday either. I have a wishlist blog for a reason, i am not giving you this because i don't want any of it, i want all of it and i think that there is more than enough on there that everyone should be able to get something on there. *sigh* I love my family, but they are painfully oblivious at times.

In any case, i am going to have to cancel these last two credit cards just to save myself from financial/marital pain! And my DH wonders why i won't let him merge our finances. Could you imagine? I would see the mortgage payment in there and be like OOOOHHHH look at all the extra money!

AGAIN!

I mean seriously, is there a guy out in the middle of the atlantic churning the water up and causing all of these hurricanes and tropical storms. I am certainly tired of them and i don't live in Florida. My job however is effected by these natural disasters. This weekend again there will be management here on the floor for the next natural wonder. I am not against working, but i am tiring of seeing my managers 7 days a week. It is putting a serious cramp in my ability to stitch. So as of yet, i have not gotten a lot done. A few more stitches on the first model piece and i am almost done with my part of an Open RR i am taking part of, which is due on Oct 1. Oh and a breadcloth for an exchange. *sigh* i have to stop overcommitting myself to things.

But they sound like such fun!

I really feel for everyone in Florida though. I hope that they weather this storm and come out ok.

Yeah!

Thanks to Annette, I now have a comment section. At least now i can show my husband that someone reads this thing. Ok well, maybe i can. At least i know that if i say something here you guys/gals are all free to comment. YIPEE!

New day, New focus

I said when i started this blog that i wouldn't turn it into a pity or gripe session on paper (well web) and i guess sometimes life is just overwhelming and i need to let it out. So i am sorry for the last post. Somedays i am overcome and i can't always keep the emotions in check.

I haven't gotten a lot done in the land of stitching due to the past couple of hurricanes just making my life unreal. I don't live in the affected areas and i feel for those that do. My job however is affected by weather and i can tell you that my whole floor has stayed busy with fiber cuts, aerial fiber down, traffic issues and power outages. All of which there is nothing we can do about as our techs who are wonderful people are just overworked and unable to get to half of the locations. So we are all overstressed here and i know it doesn't even compare to what the residents of these areas are going through. It is rough and i have sent as much as i can to help in the clean up efforts. So no stitching over here...I miss it. Of course with so much going on my husband and i have been putting in a lot of hours and we have not gotten to see or talk and our poor son gets attention, but i know that i am half alive when i am watching him.

Hopeful though the next two storms (Jeanine and Karl) are headed away from us and Javier is going to cause a little havok in AR, but hopefully it will just be rain.

Frustrated/Disappointed/Sad

We are not pregnant. I think that if i see my period one more time, i may never drag myself up out of my depression. I know that i am a bit focused on this and people say that this has some affect on things, but *sigh*. I am seriously depressed though. I do love love love my son and i just want a big family. I feel like we are running out of time. Not because i am turning 30 as i am not really caught up on the age thing, but because i want my son to have a playmate his age. I want him to grow up and have a close bond with his siblings. I want to be energetic enough to play with them all. I have to stop watching Cheaper by the Dozen, because i always want 12 kids after seeing that. I mean how fun that would be!!!

Go ME!

Ok I have to toot my own horn. I did my very first French Knot today on one of the Model Pieces i am working on. I have been dreading them ever since reading all the posts talking about how hard they are. I have to admit they are hard to do, but i just focused on what i wanted it to look like and after a few times there it was. So i needed to bookmark this moment. My specialty stitch happy dances are few and far between.

So my Model Piece #2 for Pine Glen Designs is going in the mail tomorrow to it's owner. I hope she is pleased with my work. I get nervous about that sort of thing. I never know what someone else is looking for.

Another tick on the Completed list! Go me. I have a ton to complete before the end of the year, but i am steadily plugging away!

Power of the Internet

I grew up in a computer household. I have had a computer for as long as i can remember and my sister has had her own as well. PC Jr's, anyone remember those? Golly those were small computers and so slow compared to what we have now. It was in my college years that i started using the internet for things and now it seems like I have always done so. It amazes me the information that is out there to be found.

The whole thing that has spurred this was my becoming a Moderator for a Secret Exchange/Fairy forum for Stitching the Night Away . I am so excited to be able to do this and i look at it as a lot of fun. It got me to thinking though. Before i found the TWBB I never really talked much about stitching. I never showed off my pieces to anyone and had been completely unaware of the designs, fabrics and threads available to me. I think that the industry has really taken off and i think that the Internet has really helped it along. I am excited to think that i can chat with someone who lives in a completely different country. I love meeting new people, seeing everyone's finished work, works in progress and families. It is encouraging to me the pride people feel for what they are doing and that they are proud to show it off. I love seeing how someone else interprets a design and may change the colors or fabric. Making each piece unique to its stitcher.

With all that said, come on over to the Stitching the Night Away Message Board. Register, it's free! We are a really fun group. Come sit a while with me in the Secret Exchange forum and see if there is anything you would like to be a part of. We have some really exciting ideas. I love the Halloween "Trick or Treat" Exchange idea. I look forward to seeing some of you there.

Here i am!

Well i have just survived through a really busy time last week here at work and a nice three day weekend. Work was completely crazy. Since my job depends on the weather, any natural disasters to hit the US become my concern. I am keeping a close eye on Ivan i can tell you that. I know that i feel horrible for those people in Florida and have sent what we can spare here to help out the efforts.

I am SO SO SO close to finishing up model#2. It was a really quick stitch and if i hadn't gotten dead tired for some reason it would be done. But i can't mail it until monday anyways as i need to get paid first. No monies, no postage!

Then i will work on the RR i am in and then the breadcloth for the exchange. Both of those are due to be shipped out on Oct 1. I am working on the Model #1 here at work, four days a week. A lot of confetti, really makes the stitching slow!

Welcome to the post of today!

I am feeling a bit nutty today, so please forgive me if this post makes less than viable sense.

I have another finish! I finished the Purple Griffon for my Open RR piece. I re-worked the wings because i felt that they were missing some sparkly. So i added some light purple #4 braid to the wings and it really looks great. I am pleased.

I will say that this year i have had a ton more finishes than i have in a while. I have to thank all of the members of my beloved bulletin boards for that. I feel like i get a lot of support from them and they are so encouraging. Plus they give me the courage to try things like adding metallics or beads to a piece. I would of never thought of doing so before. I was very by the book. I always believed in staying inside the lines and not making any changes, but now i have the courage to try and the knowledge as well. So a big thank you to all the people who have made this possible.

Well another hurricane heads for Florida. I think that somewhere out there Florida has pissed a weather master off. My goodness! I hope that my family gets through this one as well with little damage. I am sending my prayers to all of those families that are being displaced right now. I know this is a very stressful time for them.

I have just come off of my weekend. I didn't do a whole lot this weekend, but i did spend some much needed time with my horses. I miss them so much and i never get to spend any time just being with them and giving them treats. My DH now has wed/thur off for the next two months so i will get some time out there. I love being out there and i am always so torn. I miss my son when i am at the barn and my horses when i am with my son.

On the craft front i spent time finishing up getting my part ready to mail out for the Open RR. I mailed that out on the 1st. Then i received the piece from Beth,her theme is patriotic and the pattern i picked out is perfect. I really hope she likes it. I got to put a few stitched in that today. I am always so nervous that my patterns will be off center even though i count it out about 50 times before i put a stitch in. Also i put a couple of hours in on one of the models that i am working on and will have mailed out on the 15th. It is a simple design and has stitched up pretty quick. I was looking at it tonight and could kick myself in the head...One side i am off one stitch and am gonna have to redo that. Grrrr! Other than that i found some time to kit up Stroke of Midnight by TW. I have been wanting to do this one for some time. Although i have a lot on my plate that i want to finish there are some changes i want to make to her and i wanted to get my ideas down and floss tossed before i forgot about it. I love the color of her dress, but i want to add some shine and sparkle to it. So i have two sections of the kit, one part i have the dress kitted up in silks and the other uses the DMC along with some metallics so add a subtle sparkle. I am torn between the two. Since it is a solidly stitched piece i can't see myself doing it twice! I also kitted up TW's Harvest Sampler. I have really started appreciating samplers lately and i am starting to collect them by the droves. Ok well i have started listing those i want to collect, how about that?

I joined this other stitcher exchange with another bulletin board that i post on some. It is a not so secret stitcher exchange. I think maybe i was very spoiled on the TWBB SS because it is about a week into it and i haven't heard personally from the person yet. The lady i have, i e-mailed her a couple of questions since she barely filled out the questionnaire and i haven't gotten a response. I get the feeling that she mainly posts on the bb and isn't on the computer much. I fell that she could at least tell me that. I have already seen a couple of posts of people asking who their PAL is. I think that is very sad. Why sign up for something if you aren't going to participate? That makes for a disappointing experience. Maybe i expect too much though.

Oh i have thought of a new idea that i am going to work on. I have several ideas for Halloween and Christmas frames. I am very excited about this. I think that they will work great for these two designs i have to do for gifts. I have always wanted some frames for the holidays and i have some great ideas. Yeah for Michael's and their wood and paint (oh and glitter) section!

Well i think i have bored any readers that i may have enough. So i will sign off for now.

Oh and i added my webshots album to the right hand column. I can't believe i have never put that there! So careless of me! I would blame it on a blonde moment, but my roots are really showing so that wouldn't work.

WHEW!

What a week i have had! I feel like i have accomplished nothing though in the grand scheme of things.

I found out who my wonderful Secret Stitcher was and i am pretty sure that i am right. I only need to see her confirmation on the BB before revealing her name here. How embarassing if i am wrong!

In stitching news I have just about finished the Purple Griffon that i will be mailing out tomorrow (on time i might add) for the Open RR i am in. I just need to backstitch it and then get the instructions and whatnot together for the other ladies in the RR. I would of liked to keep my piece here so that i can get started on the quilt part of the process, but after some debate with myself i feel it is only fair to send it out. Afterall these ladies are sending their pieces around, why should mine be different?

I haven't done really any other stitching than that as i really wanted to keep up with the deadlines as this is my first RR and i would hate for someone to think i am not holding my end up.

I have joined a Not So Secret Exchange on the PALS BB and am excited for this to be underway. I am going to do the Secret Stitcher again, but it doesn't start until Oct and i just couldn't wait that long to spoil someone again. Plus i am always looking for new people to meet. I have already gotten her name and heard from the lady that has mine. So we are off to a good start!

It is coming up on my weekend and so i am hoping to get some major stitching done. I would like to finish a model i am working on for Pine Glen Designs up and get part of the way through the second page of the one i am working on for Character Creations. I love both designs so it is a hard choice. I work the most on Kerry's piece since she is the first one to take me on as a model stitcher. I am so grateful for that and i hope that my work will please her.

We have been having issue with my DS sleeping through the night in his crib the last two nights. It is frustrating for my husband since i work third shift and he works first shift. I don't know what is wrong with him. He cuts teeth with a minimum of fuss and i can't find where he is hurting , if at all. He sleeps in our room in his own crib, but he is waking up and won't go back to sleep. *sigh* I wish i knew.

I am a bit behind on my Stitching Question of the week. So i am just going to do this week's and last weeks.

Designer wishes
Filed under:
General— Jennie @ 12:00 am
What would you most like your favourite designer to design next?

This is a hard one. I would love to see another dragon from Dracolair to go with the Noon Basking, Dawn Awakening and Ouroborous maybe something in a green. Then i would love to see TW do maybe a two part Olde World map and integrate alot of the suggestions i have read on the bb. Then i want to see Dinky Dyes come out with a sampler for either spring of fall that incorporates some of their lovely colors. I am doing their wedding sampler and i am loving the silks and the colors. I am working on getting a full set of their silks so that i can start using them in some other projects.

Patience is a virtue
Filed under:
General— Jennie @ 12:00 am
Firstly, thank you to Valerie for her question suggestion:
Do you feel cross stitching requires patience?

I think in some cases it does, only because there are times that i just want a piece to be done with. I try to only stitch pieces that i will really enjoy, but there are times that i have begun a piece and then i am just tired of it. (lady death comes to mind) I love the journey, but sometimes i just want a bus to the end!

I am posting again just to list that i have created a STASH blog . Why you ask? Well there are a few reasons. I shop online quite a bit, plus i am an impulse shopper, i am participating in a few swaps as well as the Secret Stitcher fun. This will give people an opportunity to see what i buy and have to help them make choices that aren't on my wishlists if they chose. It will be a long list, but considerably shorter than it might of been before the unfortunate loss of a ton of stash. Oh well I guess i get to go collecting again.

How in the world do i get comments on this blog? I love this template, but it is missing a few things. I am just not html literate enough to figure it out. I took help from a kind friend to get my blog the way it is today. So if anyone is taking the time to read this and can point me in the direction of comments. HELP! :-)

Daily Musings

Yesterday i received a package containing Annette's Mystery IV, which she has already started and i must say, i hope that i can do this piece the justice she has thus far. I also received the books that i won off E-bay. I bid on some quilting books and a Better Homes & Gardens Cross Stitch book that i have been unable to find in stores. I know like i need any more books, but i sometimes can't help myself. My husband thinks i am bonkers, but as long as i am not spending a fortune he is fine with it.

This round of Secret Stitchers is coming to an end and i am sad. I have really enjoyed this round. I love spoiling the person that i received and whom ever is spoiling me is doing a FABULOUS job of it! I can't wait for this to start up again in October, right in time for me birthday! It is a big birthday too. The big 3-0! Everyone keeps asking if i am upset or worried, but in all honesty age is just a number. I think that you are as young as you feel and that you should live each life to the fullest. I think that i do that. I do know that lately i have gotten in a little slump, but it is all due to working nights and getting slips of naps no longer than an hour, which after months of this anyone would be cranky and functioning on a less than normal level. I think i do well to speak much less function. I really need to get off of this shift and into something that i enjoy doing.

As for turning 30, i could care less. It is another birthday in the line of birthdays and i am in no way intimidated by it. Let it come! I'M READY FOR IT!

Some Updates

This has just been a crazy last few days. We have been crazy here at work so i have actually had to WORK! I mean come on people do i look like i want to be here working all night? No! But that has been the case, so my stitching has fallen to the wayside and has been sadly calling to me. I am hoping to pick it up after i finish updating my blog.

The first round of Secret Stitchers is coming to an end. I have really enjoyed giving suprises to my stitcher and i certainly have been spoiled by my SS, who has yet to reveal herself. This last box was filled with Mirabilia's, L&L, hardanger kits, books, and a sampler using Ginnie Thompson Flower thread, which i have been dying to try. I am glad that i took the plunge it has been good for me to be able to spoil someone who enjoys the craft as much as i do. Sometimes it gets lonely being the only one in the house abet the whole family that enjoys it.

I have been working hard to stay on my diet. I am determined to lose this weight before i am pregnant again. Although if hopefully our prayers are answered we will be pregnant by the end of the year, which is by no means time to lose all of the weight, but i will happily accept the consequences!

Right now i am working through comparing my STASH inventory list with what i actually still have left. It is sad to put a mark by something that i had been excited about stitching, but don't have anymore. It will give me a chance to shop some more though which is definitely a good thing. I am beginning to discover all of the different types of fibers out there and am really loving my foray into the silks and fuzzy threads.

I am wanting to make one of those gorgeous beaded scissor fobs that everyone has, but i can't figure out if they are using the invisible thread that you make the necklaces with or what. I am bit too embarassed to ask someone so i will just mess around until i figure it out. I am too terribly shy to come out and ask questions on the BB's sometimes. I feel silly and sometimes i don't feel like i really belong. But i am trying to get over it by posting on various topics and trying to help people out, although many other have a better grasp on the craft and can answer better.

I am constantly amazed at the generosity and unselfishness of others. I have received some great packages of beads and threads from members of the TWBB who completely and forever have my gratitude for this. Another member, Annette, who i am going to mention because her generosity has just rendered me speechless. I have never met her and have probably posted a couple of times on threads she has, but she is going to send me her unfinished Mystery IV to replace the one i lost. I honestly don't know how to even begin to describe how amazed i am at this. I posted on the BB to speak about my loss, not wanting people to give me stuff, but here these truly wonderful people are giving up parts of their precious stash because they want to help. This restores my faith in that there are good people out there.

So this post is just a big THANK YOU to everyone for your support, concern and gifts that are unexpected and very appreciated.

FINALLY!

It is the eve of my weekend. I am SO ready for a few days off!

I did a very big and hard thing today. I cut up a credit card. So now i only have one credit card left. I am just not doing well on paying these down. I just keep ordering things and it isn't helping to pay the cards off if i put on what i pay off. I really have to have them paid off before we go and get financing for a new house otherwise we will not qualify for anything much. I would hate for this to be my fault. So i had to be an adult today and cut up the card. After i went and bought a few things for my DS, of course. *sigh*

Stitching Wise:

I will be posting a picture of the piece i am working on for my theme in the Open RR that i joined. It is the purple Griffon from Vermillionand it is coming along nicely. I have also gotten quite a bit done on the model piece i am working on, but i can't share that with you yet. Then I have also almost finished the first page on Caring Wings. So i will get all of that updated in Webshots this weekend.

I am off to read some of my favorite blogs and see what all transpired in Vegas. I wish i could of gone and met some of the people i chat with often.

I haven't really had much to say here lately. I have been busy taking stock of what i have stash wise and what i am missing. Needless to say that this is a depressing task. One though that has brought me to realize that i seriously need to list all of my books as well. I have seriously over 5,000 title. Yes you read correctly there. I am a great lover of the written word. That is probably the reason behind my having an English degree as just one of the B.A.'s that i have. We won't get into why I am currently at this job, WAY WAY WAY away from where i wanted to be.

So once we move into our new house that is what i shall be doing is undertaking the task of cataloging all of my books. I am very fortunate to have a list of all of the charts, beads, charms, etc that i own, at lease i know how much i need to work on replacing. However it will be a long time before i have the money to do so.

You can bet that i will be insuring what i have left and my books on a separate policy though, i know i have well over $30,000 in books at home and i just couldn't imagine trying to replace them. Some of them are out of print, antiques, first editions, leather, etc. I think i would cry.

HE IS FOUND!

I posted yesterday about stacey's missing son and i cannot honestly say how happy i am that he has been found safe and sound. It is a true miracle and i know that Stacey and her family have to be so very relieved.

I know that i don't know Stacey personally, but i feel that while i don't know a lot of the TWBB'ers personally we are still part of a big family. I know that when something happens good or bad to family and friends that it affects me personally. I have been crying and praying for his safe return and i am glad *so very very glad* that he is back with his parents. I know that the emotions they are feeling must just be very overwhelming.

So i send (((BIG HUGS))) to stacey and david and her entire family to help them get through what still has to be a very emotional time for them.

I had a post topic all picked out until i read the TWBB and then it changed in an instant when i read about Stacey aka Prin's missing son. I honestly cannot imagine the terror and emotions that she and her family are going through right now. So my post topic seems silly and stupid in light of this event. I want Stacey to know that i am praying for her son's safe return and that i am here for her if she needs it. I know that she honestly has no time to read this, but i am putting it out there for her to read later when her son is safe and sound and tucked in his bed.

I put this prayer from Sandra Griffin here for Stacey and to let her know that i am thinking of her.

Prayer For The Missing Children


Heavenly Father, as in the past,
I come, with heart in hands,
offering love and worship;
Seeking insight to Your plans.

Every day, dear Lord,
Missing children are brought to mind;
So many taken, by one parent or the other.
But, many others we just can't find.

Though, I know, my Heavenly Father,
You have them in Your sight.
They are never lost to You.
Please help them in their fright.

Sweet little faces,
with smiles that melt our heart,
Taken, maybe by some stranger.
That tears our soul apart.

Father God, such wrenching pain~
Almost more than we can bear .
We, as mortals, can cope no more.
So, we give them to You in prayer.

Some, my Lord, I'm sure, have passed
From our earthly house to Yours.
They have crossed the chilly waters
And come to Heaven's shores.

Others, though, we still have hope,
will return to arms of family love,
Here, on earth; still abiding,
Not tome for them to go above.

Lord, be a comforter
For those who wait and mourn.
The grieving parents You gave them,
The child that they had born.

Though unseen to us, my Father,
You know just where they are, today.
Those gathered home to You, now, safe;
It's for the missing that we pray.

Please hold them, Jehovah God
Protect them from the pain.
Tend them all and mercy keep,
And send them home again.

All these things we ask of you.
Please, let us hope, for now.
We know not where they be.
Return them, Father.
To you we leave the how.

We live each wee one, O Lord;
The teenager and those in between~~~
Out of sight from us, my Lord.
But, to You, they are not unseen.

The search will never end.
For, some have gone astray.
Father, watch over them
And send some home today.

Bless the little children, Lord.
Wipe away each frightened tear;
For those who made it home with You
And for those who still linger here.

Whether we find them, Jesus,
Either here, on earth, or over there;
God tell them, every one,
How very much we care.

The never ending search goes on
'Til we meet at Jesus' feet.
'Twill be reunited, there,
And all things, in You, are now complete.

So, Father of mercy, who knows all things,
Hear us as we pray for every one.
May all things be as You have planned
And for the children, may Thy will be done.

Amen

I was reading Jen's blog and she had this cool site for getting your fairy name, so here goes:


Your fairy is called Oak Elfwitch
She is a cheerful sprite
She lives in forests of oak and lime trees
She is only seen in the enchanted moment between sleep and waking 

 
So true...

I am seriously behind in my Stitcher's Question of the week so i am going to play a little catch up here. Bear with me:

QOTW for the week of 5 July 2004 
Which project (finished or in progress) are you most proud of? Explain why.

I would have to say that i don't really have one yet. While i love all of my projects I will be most proud of finishing the Lady Death since i did all the work on it.  Plus it is for my dad and i know he will really appreciate it.

QOTW for the week of 12 July 2004 
How do you choose a project? What “calls” to you the most? 
For me it is the colors and the variation in the types of stitches. I love jewel tones and color contrasts. I like such a variety in themes that i never really stick with one theme.

QOTW for the week of 19 July 2004
Would you consider yourself ‘addicted to stitching’? Why or why not?

I wouldn't say i am addicted, more like i am addicted to the process of kitting a project up. I love the journey from start to finish.

QOTW for the week of 26 July 2004

What are your favourite cross stitching websites and why?  
I like websites with clear instructions and lots of variety. I have so many bookmarked on my computer at home that i don't where to start. I do find myself looking at ABC Stitch Therapy if there is a new design out because i know Marie will have it up there. I also like Cameo Rose's site as it has such a huge directory of information. Of course then there are the BB's, but i am in a bit of a quandry about them right now. There is an upheaval going on and i for one am a day late and a dollar short in knowing what in the world happened. Geesh take a break for a little while to move, I come back and BAM!

So there you have it i am caught up on these! YEAH!

GRRR!

I spent all this time entering a post yesterday that i was so inspired on and it isn't there! I am telling you, my blog is holding a grudge for my recent lack of activity!

So here it is again...much less witty though

I was inspired by several peoples blogs to sit down and evaluate where i am in my stitching WIP's and whatnot. So below i am putting it all out there for everyone (if there is actually anyone who reads this) and i am not holding back.

WIP'S
* Model Piece - This is my first ever model and i am progressing well on it. At least i think i am. I suffer from this inane worry that the designer will not like my stitching and that i just do not do the piece justice. While the subject is not one that i would pick for myself, i am really enjoying the process and i love the colors. I am so honored to be doing this piece for this designer as i own several of her designs and i love them. I am not as far along as i could be since i am taking it slow in order to make sure i stitch my best and i have been doing a lot of frogging. I cannot get this one color to lay flat for me.  Right now this is my focus piece and if it weren't for all of this frogging I would be done with the first page. GOAL: To get past the first page before August 1.

* Caring Wings by Mirabilia - This piece is for my DH's cousin. At first it was started because she had experienced some medical issues and some issue with becoming pregnant, now in addition we have drawn her name in the family Christmas drawing and so it is going to be her gift for that. So far i only have what you see in the webshots albums done not much more. I have not gotten a chance to work on this piece since making the model piece my focus. I do hope however to finish it by the end of November at the very latest as it will need to be framed and wrapped before the trip to see her. GOAL: To add this back into my rotation and work on at least once every two weeks.

* Horse Baby by Ellen Maurer Stroh - This is for Operation Teddy Bear and it is due August 1. I am about 2/3 of the way done with it. I hadn't worked on it much since we moved, but it should stitch up fairly easily from this point on. I am thinking that i will stitch it again for one of my students as well. I should be able to finish this by the end of this week and then send it along with the others to OTB. GOAL: Finish this.

* Celtic Wedding Sampler by Dinky Dyes - This is a gift for my very very best friend who was married on June 5th of this year. She is busy travelling and will be living in several different places for a couple of months so i don't need to have this done until she figures out where she wants to land for good. I have almost finished the first page of this. I am using the Dinky Dyes silks and am really loving this piece. I haven't stitched on it in a while though in order to put good time in on my model piece. GOAL: To incorporate this back into my rotation and finish it so that something else can take it's place!

* Trick or Treat Tree by Mill Hill - This was started last year for my DS, but somehow or another it sprouted legs and walked away. When we moved i discovered it in a dresser drawer of all places! I am about 3/4 done with it. I plan on getting this done for my sisters birthday this year which is on Halloween. I should be able to do this. GOAL: Find time to stitch a few hours on this and finish it up.

* Lady Death by me - URGH! I haven't picked this up in a while. I redid the design and am much happier with the new thread and color choices, but there is just too many other projects that i have to work on. My dad will get this, hopefully before he dies. GOAL: To work on this once a month.

* Santa and Elf Stocking by Bucilla - This is actually a felt piece, but there is stitching in it. It is for my DS and my DH wants this done before Christmas this year. I haven't done much on it, but i need to pull it out and work on it some. GOAL: To incorporate this into my rotation once in a while.

* Beginner RR with fellow ANN BB members - This was to be my first RR, but it has been at a slight stand still lately. We lost a member and since then there hasn't been a flurry of activity concerning the start and whatnot. It has a size limit of 50x50 stitches and there is really no set theme. Everyone is providing the patterns or website in which you can get the patterns for this. My piece is the floral alphabet with everyone stitching the first letter of their name. I have everything ready, but i have not started to grid the fabric or start my letter yet. I guess i am just not sure if this will get off the ground and i don't want to have to frog the letter to use the fabric for something else. GOAL: see if i can get an answer on when this will start.

* Open Themed RR with Stitching the Night Away BB members - I found a thread for this on the STNA BB and i put myself in when they needed a fourth person. I figure since the other one hasn't gotten off the ground i really want to be a part of one and get some good references. I would like to be able to do RR with other TWBB members and whatnot. You have to start somewhere, right? The theme is your own to pick for your piece, which i like. So far i have nothing but an idea for it. i am still waiting to hear if there are any restrictions on fabric and whatnot. GOAL: Hmmmm...

* Bread Cloth Exchange - I have my bread cloths and some pattern ideas, but so far this exchange is slow in getting off the ground. Not a lot of people seem to be interested in it. There isn't a theme it is kinda based on the person that you get in the exchange part and what they want. So i am just kinda waiting on this one. Hopefully someday soon. GOAL: To have a good experience and meet some new people.

*Whew* so there it is all that i have in WIP section. I know that it is not a lot in comparison to others out there, but for me that is a lot. I would like to start one of the hundreds of patterns i have kitted up. But i am thinking that my next start will need to be "The Wedding" by L&L as a 10th anniversary gift for my DS. She didn't get a big wedding like i did since she went to the J of the P and i know that she would love this piece. I am waiting for the fabric for it. I have the fabric it calls for,but i am really wanting to do this piece on a molted green i think it would be stunning. So i am waiting for the swatch of the fabric that mindy at Sugar Maple Fabrics is dying for me.

Hopefully this posts, all this typing. It would be worse than a page of frogging...ok well maybe not AS bad.

It has been a really long time since i have posted anything to this blog. I am sure that if anyone used to read this that they certainly are not anymore. Well what has been happening with me? June was a literal blur. We sold the house, packed up and moved half of our stuff into storage and the rest into a tiny two bedroom apartment, my DS had his first birthday during that move, had a huge financial setback and have survived all of this with a minimum of fuse and muss.

Now July i really have no excuse for not writing other than i simply am spending all of my free time stitching. I am working on finishing up my squares for operation teddy bear, working on my very first model, putting in a few stitches here and there on the Celtic Wedding Sampler and the angel that i am working on for a gift.

So far my first experiences with stitching a model for a designer have been great. I just keep getting frustrated with my stitches and have probably frogged this one section 3 times. I just can't seem to get the stitches to lay flat and i am just not happy with how it looks. I want to do the best i can, so RIP RIP RIP!

My DS now almost 13 months I can't believe how different he has become. He is so very smart. He isn't saying a whole lot, but he has advanced motor skills so apparently this will all even out soon. I wish there was a manual though some days i am at a loss for what the correct way to handle a situation is. One day he woke up from his nap and just cried and threw a tantrum for no reason. He didn't want to be held, but wanted to. I just don't get it??? Sometimes i wonder if i am missing something. I never know. Not having anyone to ask about it is frustrating at time also.

YES!!!

I don't need to remind anyone who bothers to read this about our saga with selling this house, but it is SOLD!!! I am so happy I could cry. I don't think i have slept in days just from the sheer excitement of it all. There is still the inspection to get through, but seeing as how it is a fairly new house there shouldn't be too many things that need fixing. I still can hardly believe it is over. The closing is June 25th, which gives us very little time. Everything is going into storage and we are moving into an apartment to regroup financially (we took a loss on the house *sigh*) and find the right house to move to. I don't even mind that. It will be much easier to look for a house not having to worry about selling our house first. So i will be busy busy trying to pack up everything we have and decide what goes to storage and what gets stored at my dad's since i don't trust storage for things like crafts, clothes, etc. Sadly i cannot take any of my stitching stuff except projects i am working on to the apartment with the limited room, but it will be set up in my old room at my dad's so it will be nearby. It will certainly be interesting to live in an apartment again, especially with my DS. I bet i really get no sleep now. I think my body and mind are beyond tired now, one day i am sure it will just shut down.

Stitching wise i have updated my album with new photos of the two projects i am working on. Also a designer that i have several of her patterns has decided to entrust me with a design to model stitch. I am thrilled. I have always loved her stuff and now i get to stitch it. I can barely stand my good luck! I am working on getting the bear done and I am SO SO close all i have left is the rug he stands on, so it will be any day now with some good sit down time put in. Then it is off to the OTB people. I haven't worked much on Caring Wings just because i am focusing on the bear right now. I have ordered the Celtic Wedding Sampler from Dinky Dyes to work on as a gift for my dear dear best friend who will be married this summer. I ordered and received the silks, but i am thinking of changing one of the colors as it just isn't something she would like so i have several extra silks to play with there. I have also order the Bijoux metallics for it and fabric and am waiting for that to come in.

Whew! I am beat, but so happy to almost be out of this house.

I seem to be in a very creative and get organized mood lately. I have been riddled with thoughts of how to organize this and that as well as what projects and things i want to start. Of course, these thoughts are all in my head at the same time i am supposed to be napping. So here i sit at work, tired out of my head, but YIPEE it is Friday for me and i am SO looking forward to a weekend. Bad news is the conformation of layoffs by our CEO (although you can't really deny them once the news has posted them) and so at the beginning of June we will lose 7,500. I really didn't think we had that many people in the company anymore. It is scary it is like riding a sinking ship and watching the water lap at your feet. I just have a bad feeling about these layoffs, i just pray that my DH escapes this round. I pray for myself as well, but i just feel like things happen for a reason. We are desperately in need of the money though. We can't afford to be a single income family right now, no matter how much i complain about it. I feel that it is inevidable that some other corporation will buy us out and we will all lose our jobs anyways.

Nothing on the crafty front, but i should get quite a bit done this weekend. After some much needed sleep.

Courtesy of BlogIdeas:
What's the big idea:
Seriously... Where does the other sock end up?

I seriously used to have quite a theory on this. I believed that there was a troll or sprite living in the dryer tube and that this individual needed to have socks in order to live and keep warm when the dryer was not in operation. My theory was pretty good, i mean we would do one load and lost a sock, but if we did enough to heat the house for the day we never lost one. Striking observation, huh?

Courtesy of BlogIdeas

What's the big idea:

Childish games to play on co-workers.

Ok this one is easy as i used to work for a company in which i was one of two females in the office and we had a lot of free time on our hands. I miss those days even though the pay sucked, the office atmosphere was SO much more inviting to healthy fun. I can remember when my ex-boss was leaving the company (the beginning of the end) and we were throwing him a good-bye party. My co-conspiritor and I got into the office early in order to set up the food and whatnot. Of course, you know as the only females in the office we were responsible for the planning and follow through of all parties. I mean female = party planner and provider, right? I think i saw that in the dictionary somewhere, the male version... In any case, We got in early and were feeling a bit more awake then our appearance led others to believe. We locked ourselves in our bosses office and proceded to tape everything to the ceiling. You think i am joking, but 3M would be proud to know that it's Scotch tape will hold up to hanging staplers, hole punches and trash cans. We were thinking about the chair, but if it possibly fell and hit him, now that would defeat the purpose of the prank, wouldn't it? We wanted to hurt him for leaving us, but not in any serious fashion mind you. We taped everything on his desk directly above it in a sort of mirror image: Desk blotter first, then papers, pens, stapler, coffee mug, etc. The we secured the desk drawers on the inside of the desk with clear packing tape, making entry very hard. We put a small square of scotch tape over the mouth piece on his phone, effectively allowing him to hear others on calls, but they couldn't hear him (it took him the better part of the day to get that one). We taped the legs of his chair to the floor mat and raised the seat so that the arms were stuck under the desk. We hung his pictures on the ceiling and what wouldn't hild up there we hung upside down on the wall. Then we got the rest of the office ready as if it were a normal innocent party for our beloved boss. I will tell you that the look on his face was beyond priceless! I wish we had a camera back then, but it was a spur of the moment idea that worked beautifully. Ahhh i love being childish at times.

I must give credit to Annette and WhizGidget for the addition of the Fun Sites to the right here. I always enjoy reading their bloggs and these sites were in Friday's edition. I will use them from time to time when i am out of ideas or need something fun to talk about. In fact, I may use them a bit later today! :-)

Today was Mother's Day. Now in the past i normally didn't put much into this day. Not because i don't love my mother, but she passed on when i was fairly young so i didn't grow up putting mych stock into this day. Things certainly change when you have a child of your own. It puts a whole new meaning on the day. But to tell you the truth I have felt that every day has been mother's day for me since having DS. I couldn't feel more complete except for maybe the addition of a few more children. So for me one day isn't necessary to celebrate this day, but rather all the days are a celebration to me. Of course I may change this when he is a teenager with my mood swings.

I watched one of my favorite movies today, "One True Thing" with Meryl Streep. For those of you who haven't seen the movie, it is just plain heart-wrenching about a mother who is dying from cancer and her daughter comes home to help out. It is a great movie even though it is so depressing. I mean you can just feel the emotion and pain and love throughout the movie and it always reminds me of something i tend to forget. And that would be that i should be living my life, not just existing in it. I forget that alot. I tend to put things off or not go out and do things thinking that i can do it later. What kind of example will this be for my son? What if I died today, would i be happy with how i spent my day? I am not looking to overload my day, but sometimes i need to be reminded to get off my butt and stop sitting on the couch. I love being active, but i tend to get home and just not want to leave the house. I always feel better once i leave and do stuff, but i have to fight that shackle of staying in the house that seems to clamp on the minute i walk in the door. I want my son to learn about everything i can teach him about life, i want to take him out into the world and show him all the wonderful experiences that living life has to offer, so that he grows up to lead a rich and full life. I just don't believe that we were put here to sit around and watch TV and cruise idlely through life.

I am also gun-ho on creating memories and keepsakes for my children. Whenever i watch that movie it also reminds me that i know virtually nothing about my own mother. I have very little to remember her by. i have a few pictures and there are a few odds and ends, but that is all. Is this what i would want my son to have of me if something were to happen? I don't think so i would want him to know what his mother was like and how that helped shape him into who he is. I don't get a lot of information from my father either, but i know that is because we just don't deal with personal issues in my family. The phrase "better left unsaid" was solely created for my family i believe. I am such a product of this. I will hold in emotion and not talk about issues that really bother me because i have never had to. This has also turned me into a slightly cold person with my family in the regards that i don't hug, kiss, etc anyone in my family with the exception of my DH and DS who receive a ton of it. I am not comfortable doing these things and i know it is because my father isn't comfortable doing these things with us or expressing these feelings. When my father married my stepmom, she is a very loving and warm person who puts a lot of stock in touchy-feely stuff and that just was plain unsettling to me. I have gotten better about it, but still I don't do those things with my "real" family members. These things have also led to my being overtly affectionate with my close friends. I tend to be more comfortable with them than anyone else.

So all of this self-examination has led to some good on my part so far. I have gotten myself up and out of the house for a good walk on Saturday which made me feel better and i feel like i really accomplished something. I am not getting more than 3 hours of sleep a day and feel a bit ragged, but i feel better when i get exercise and i think i have some mental anxiety i need to burn off in order to get some good sleep. Of course it doesn't help that when DH comes home and i get to go off and take a nap, my DS sit outside the bedroom door and smacks the door with his little hands calling for me. I am sorry i can't ignore him and wind up getting him more often than not. i have abandonment issue in a major way and have only started working through them in my offline diary. But i can't stand for him to be alone, it really bothers me terribly and to hear him out there calling my name and his little hand on the door....*sigh* enuff said there. I am pathetic. It isn't like he is alone in the house, his father is ten steps away calling him, but still. So i am just working on making my time more productive. I will take him out more and work on my projects more.

My projects...*sigh* this has grown in leaps and bounds lately. I have begun (finally) working on DS Christmas stocking. i haven't gotten very far since i have never worked with felt before and the instructions are a bit hard to understand. There are 5 pages of them and they are just plain confusing. I have stitched quite a bit on the bear for Operation Teddy Bear and should have that sent out in the next week or so. I have organized my scrapbooking supplies and made use of a sale michael's had on their stuff. I have three separate bags of items to put into scrap books and am determined to start at lease on this year, before my brain forgets everything. I have almost finished the top of the wing on the Caring Wings angel and want to start another piece on linen as it is rapidly becoming a favorite to stitch on or it could just be the project. I won't know unless i start something else, right? I have a huge urge to bake tons of bread, but to be fair to DH and his Atkins diet i am successfully holding that at bay.

House is still for sale. Tired of all it.

So that is it for me. I want to do a wedding sampler for my dear dear best friend, whose wedding i will miss due to a family obligation and i am completely torn up about this. But i know i won't get it ready in time, but i am seriously considering it anyways because i feel like i have let her down in a major way. But i have no money and have promised DH that i wouldn't spend anymore on the credit cards. We are trying to lower debt so that we can purchase the 2005 Town & Country with the Stow 'n Go option and i need to work on getting my bills as low as i can.

So that is all in my world right now. I haven't gone out to see my horse in forever, but i will be getting out there hopefully on my weekend which is coming up. It is a three day since here we work on the holidays, you can wind up having your Memorial Day holiday the first week of may so that they have coverage at work. I may not get to blog again until friday since i am training tomorrow night and then off for three days. Did i mention the major major layoffs we are going through again here in June? If they are phasing my position out i may be on this list this time around. I am more than a little worried about this.

I am certain that it is obvious that i haven't posted anything in a while here. It isn't for lack of something to say though. I have conflicting thoughts about this blog. Mainly this is something that my friends and possibly my family read and some of the thoughts that i get i don't feel the need to let my family and friends in on until i am good and ready. I like working things out in journals through many many entries and whatnot and i feel like i am holding back in this blog just because i fear what some may think. So there will be times when i go amiss for a few weeks and not to worry i shall return. It just means that i have returned to my old friends "pen and paper" to work out something rattling about in the old bean.

In stitching news, i have legs left on the the bear project and have almost finished over half a page on the Caring Wings. I am having a bit of an issue staying focused and just working on the bear mostly, but that is because i am/was tired of all the green and browns. Almost done though, thank goodness!I am anxious to start some of my other projects but i am beinggood and holding back. Probably for the best so that i can finish my goals for the year.

I am a little behind due to training here at work. It is seriously cutting into my blogging time. Here are last week's Stitcher's Five:

1. Which do you prefer, Kits or Charts?

This is a toss up for me, but normally i prefer charts.

2. Why?

More often than not i would prefer to buy everything at once, but i have not liked the quality of the floss and fabric in a lot of the kits i have bought recently so i am learning towards charts.

3. How do you organize your materials before you stitch

I put all the floss in a ziploc bag, grid the fabric, get Q-snaps for the piece, scissors and then a big gallon size bag to store it all in.

4. Do you do anything to the sides of your fabric before starting?

More often than not the fabric has already been serged by whomever i bought it from, but otherwise i will serge it quickly.

5. What do you do with the leftovers when you’re done?
I keep any leftover floss. If it is floss from a kit that i don't feel like identifying i will store it in a craft bin i am making for my DS to use when he is older. Or i will give it to my cat to have her way with.

What is about certain people that allows them to succeed in life while others work hard and remain in the middle? I wondered a lot about this this weekend. In the world of horses and showing you run into a lot of different types of people. Most of them are easy to deal with, while others are rude, offensive, ignorant and just plani un-pleasant. Yet these are the people that seem to have the most money, horses, and win for no other reason than they can pay someone to ride their perfect horse until that horse will not make one single mistake, then they get on ride the rounds and win. How can i be sure of this? I used to be the person that worked behind the scenes and made this happen. Now don't get me wrong, I am not talking about any of the people that ride at the barn i am at. These people with money wouldn't put their horses at my barn, the aisles aren't carpeted enough for them. But i have on two occasions worked for trainers that served this type of client and i will not ever go back to them. Now i want to be successful at riding and i am for the most part. I am not caught up in the run for points and normally manage to do quite well for myself regardless of the fact that my horses are not the top of the line. They are good, solid, generous animals that allow me to bump around on them like i know what i am doing and normally place rather well. i get irritated by others though that look down on me because i haven't spent $1000 for the top of the line jacket or breeches. You think i am kidding? Trust me i am not, clothes in the world of horse showing are ridiculously overpriced. For the amount of money they charge for these things they could at least accentuate and slim...shoot for that money it should be stain resistant. I don't often allow myself to get too worked up over things, but i have been away from this venue for a little bit and coming back it was...refreshing to see things hadn't changed.

So many people approach me about opening up my own barn, but as tempting as the idea is I know that it wouldn't be what i want right now. Maybe later on. My primary focus is to give my son and future children what i never had, a parent at home. By no fault of my DF who did his very very best to raise my sister and i, but it is more important to me to be home for my child(ren). I miss the constant showing and riding though. I really do. It is weird how the peolpe at the barn though don't come to me as they did before for everything, when i took the break to have DS, they had to learn a lot on their own. Sometimes i feel guilty about that, but then again i couldn't keep putting my desires for a family on hold. There would of always been kids that needed help and horses to ride and there still are. I just miss being the one needed by all of them.

So i survived my first horse show in two years and i am happy with how it went. The mare did a great job and we got some fantastic video on the second day. Hopefully this will help the owner sell her.

I do get frustrated that some people who have been in this riding business for a short time seem to get the respect and rides that i have worked hard for and for longer, so much quicker. But this is an old jealous ranting of mine that i will not bring up here. It is silly of me to feel this way, but i can't always help it. I always feel like second best to this person and will always be treated that way. It shouldn't matter, but it does.

I was reading a blog that i follow and they had posted a link to this, a Gogglism which i thought would be fun. So here is mine. I have added comments to some and changed others to reflect myself just a bit more in cases where it is blatant that isn't me.

Googlism for: debbi

debbi is here - yes i am
debbi is the health community manager for suite101 - ummm no
debbi is the shortened form of deborah which is the hebrew word for "bee
debbi is available to present programs on - i am a what????
debbi is also the co
debbi is the director of a shelter for abused women and children and volunteers in another shelter as well - volunteer yes, director no
debbi is an unusual breed of desert scavenger capable of forcing creatures much larger than itself into flight from watering holes and from their prey - cool!
debbi is the third - third what?
debbi is now in the process of developing works that reflect
debbi is a member of the national cosmetic tattooing association and the florida medical esthetic association - umm no
debbi is the recipient of several awards and honors for excellence in leadership - yup
debbi is exhausted by the time she arrives anywhere - most definitely
debbi is an angelic intuitive
debbi is available for one or two hour reiki sessions in which she combines guided imagery - HA!
debbi is
debbi is true
debbi is a long
debbi is originally from va
debbi is currently working toward the goal of receiving a master's degree in english with an emphasis in americanism
debbi is a native virginian
debbi is married and has one son, Jeremy
debbi is proud to be a part of an effective group of women
debbi is clarinet player
debbi is now in training for the july 16 olympic trials and hopes to be in sydney - was but that was for dressage
debbi is back
debbi is a lifelong resident of the earth area
debbi is more fully in the presence of god
debbi is a girl i went to junior high and high school with
debbi is the director of the miss iowa teen pageant in muscatine - um no but that may be interesting
debbi is living proof that nothing can stand in the way of the human spirit when the desire to live life and live it to the full is trusted and acted on
debbi is the author of many many journals
debbi is a board certified lactation consultant in private practice - nope but she would of been handy earlier
debbi is a frequent motivational speaker
debbi is the director of parentsplace in her own home
debbi is no stranger to helping people overcome the thrall of addiction
debbi is self taught
debbi is currently teaching horseback riding
debbi is currently working toward a bachelor's degree in zoology and biotechnology and will graduate in years to come
debbi is going to find herself "with child" - fingers crossed hopefully again soon
debbi is a freelance public relations specialist aka keeps in contact with many people
debbi is a very good and very conscientious underwriter
debbi is so cute
debbi is so sweet to do this for us
debbi is the sixth fastest 100m hurdler in australian history - i am, well i never knew :-)
debbi is not your average
debbi is doing real nice
debbi is a very classy and down to earth person
debbi is “born to be organized”
debbi is an experienced agent who brings a high energy level to every transaction she participates in with
debbi is about getting
debbi is frequently called upon to provide insight into her success at balancing the demanding roles of ceo - ceo, i am a ceo, where???
debbi is allergic to bee stings
debbi is now on the hill
debbi is second to donna now
debbi is an expert in much more than chocolate chips
debbi is now a full time coach
debbi is happy to share information about anything
debbi is currently reading
debbi is "the greatest example of godliness i've ever known
debbi is one of the most experienced environmental design
debbi is very talanted at assembling into beautiful decorations
debbi is honest and 100% reliable
debbi is an obvious jim fan - jim, jim who??
debbi is committed to living
debbi is converting pages
debbi is a vivacious regional fitness coordinator for herself
debbi is away for a few days - mentally
debbi is busy trying to paint the kitchen
debbi is a very sweet and caring person
debbi is in classic black sexy lingerie - i am, my goodness, no wonder my co-workers look at me funny
debbi is famous for her customized appearance
debbi is one of the greatest people alive on this planet
debbi is presently working on her twentieth novel for harlequin - egads and here i haven't even read one
debbi is available for model stitching
debbi is 29 yo
debbi is an accountant of her own personal finance

The Friday Five

A set from the Archives again this week - originally posted 12/19/2003:

1. List your five favorite beverages.

Milk
Water
Ginger Ale
Hot spiced apple cider
Naked - 100% juice

2. List your five favorite websites.

TWBB
FoodTV
ABC Stitch Therapy
Various Blogs i follow
ESPN

3. List your five favorite snack foods.
Hot Fries
Slices of Monterey Jack Cheese
Fruit of any kind
Popcorn
Peanut M&M's - mainly at that TOTM

4. List your five favorite board and/or card games.
Trival Pursuit
Clue

Sadly i don't play a lot games so that is all i can think of

5. List your five favorite computer and/or game system games.
Disney Trival Pursuit
Mah Jong
Rumble Cube
DVD game - Scene It!

umm.. that's about it as well for the puter games, i tend to not play much.

With that said I will move on to my main post. Today was a pretty good day. I had a great time jumping the mare i am showing this weekend around at the Indoor Arena and am only slightly apprehensive about showing. The mare has a tendency to scare herself and since we didn't jump anywhere near the height that i will be jumping tomorrow I am a little worried about it. But i have dealt with worse so i should be ok. I haven't had show ring nerves in years! But this show is costing me a fortune and i am not getting to do a lot of showing so i am definitely not thrilled about that. It will make my getting back into any sort of showing pattern stall since we need the money to go elsewhere. I am going ahead with this only because i have saved some money so i won't be flat broke, but i will be close to it for the next little while.

I saw a lot of people at the show that i haven't seen in forever! It is so great to catch up with friends that you haven't seen in a while, but then i started realising that i am a bit selfish. I want to know things that have been happening with them, but i seem to talk about myself more. What is this a personality default? I couldn't believe my cheek. I guess it is because i am so comfortable around the barn crowd having practically been raised in the show circuit, but still i can't believe how much i drew the conversation back to me. I am appalled to tell you the truth. I have to work on this. When did this happen anyways?!?!?!

Inspired by a few of the blogs that i follow i have decided to list all of the projects i have kitted up. Now i would list all my WIP's, but really the list going to the right of this text is really all that i have started. While i want to start other things, i have this deep sense of guilt as i know i have deadlines on a few pieces. I just can't bring myself to start anything new. Of course i had never heard of rotational stitching of having more than one piece going at a time until the evil enabling TWBB. But here for the record are the projects i have kitted; fabric, floss (cotton and specialty), charms, beads and all. Now i may have missed one or two, but this is as complete of a list as you will find anywhere:

Mother Goose - Bucilla
Mystery IV - Chatelaine
Brillant Butterfly Celebration - Dimension
Butterflies in Flight - Dimension
Christmas Countdown - Dimension
Count the Stars - Dimension
Cute Baby Hugs bibs - Dimension
Equestrian Duo - Dimensions Matted
Garfield - Dimensions
Here comes Santa Treeskirt - Dimensions
Sacred Connection - Dimensions
Sleigh Ride - Dimensions
Wild Rush - Dimensions
Frederick the Literate - Dimensions
Gargoyle - Homemade
Olde World Map - Janlynn
Black Magic - Just Nan
Christmas Peace - Just Nan
Gingham Christmas - Just Nan
Icy Hill - Just Nan
Three Champions - Lanarte
Angel of Hope - L&L
Celtic Spring - L&L
Firefly Faires - L&L
The Bride - L&L
The Wedding - L&L
Rocky Mountain Christmas - Marty Bell
Cruisin' - Mickey Mouse/Leisure Arts
More Mill Hill kits than i care to list
Newborn Joy - Mirabilia
Crescent Dreams - Mirabilia
Rosebud Lullaby - Mirabilia
Aida - Mirabilia
Angel of New Dawn - Mirabilia (kitted up twice!!)
Autumn Queen - Mirabilia
Cinderella - Mirabilia
Maidens of the Season I - Mirabilia
Midsummer's Night Fairy - Mirabilia
Sleeping Beauty - Mirabilia
Titania - Mirabilia
Winter Queen - Mirabilia
Ice Angel - L&L
In the Arms of an Angel - L&L
Story Time - Pooh and Friends/Leisure Arts (i think)
Diana - Silver Lining
Above the Clouds - TW
Birth Announcement - TW
Egyptian Sampler - TW
Peaceable Kingdom - TW
Romeo & Juliet - TW
Tradewinds - TW
Woodland Fairy - TW
Vermillion Freebie "May's Emerald Fairy"
All four of the animal babies that i am to do for the Operation Teddy Bear

WOW! Some of these came as kits, but the majority i kitted up myself. Each has its own set of floss. Oh my counting these i have 1, 2 ,3... 56 projects kitted up! Oh my! I guess it may be that i have less than others, at least i hope that is the case.

I have had a lovely weekend off. I hosted a stitch night at my place and got quite a bit of chatter in on top of the backstitching i needed to get done on my focus piece. Not long now and i will be sending that little bear to his new home.

Other news i am gearing up to show at my first horse show back in a while (2 years) and i am a bit nervous over the whole thing. I am not worried that i can't do it, it is more how will i look doing it. Some things have not "pulled" themselves back into their proper places. Breeches hide nothing! So i will be out in my full glory whether i am happy about it or not. Aside from that i am thrilled to be back in things, but it is weird being on the boarder side rather than the trainer side of things at the barn. I feel like i should do more, but i just can't spare the time it seems.

I may not post a whole lot this weekend as i will be in a near coma from showing all day and watching DS and then working at night. So if something doesn't make sense, not to worry it makes no sense to me either.

Many, many thanks to Hazel who is helping me work out the issue with column width here in my blog land. I am sure that I have royally messed something up being that I am the most un-computer literate person there is.

I am SO grateful to her for taking time out of her busy life to help me with this. I really appreciate her help and time.
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I watched one of my favorite shows today, "Doctors Without Borders" on the National Geographic channel. If anything will make you thankful for where you live and what you have, this is the show to watch. Actually a lot of the show on the National Geographic channel make me think. I love this show in particular though because if I hadn't gotten married I would of joined the M.S.F program or the Peace Corp to do this type of work. I want to help others and I want to be involved on a global level. I think that sometimes I take what I have and what I have been blessed with for granted and seeing how other people in other cultures live really brings me down to earth. I think it is a great thing that these doctors are doing and that people could all do with a bit of love. There is this one 60 year old grandmother on there, who was an emergency room nurse and she was talking about how you can't give them property or objects, but you can give them love and compassion and that is really all that they need. It is really all we need here as well and I think that sometimes in the world of materialism we forget this. Well at least I know that I do, I forget how blessed I am to have my family, friends, a great paying job and so many luxuries that I am rich beyond my years. It did really help me gather myself back though. I rarely get to watch this show since I am normally trying to catch a nap at this time. I like watching this channel though and the Discovery channel as some (ok most) of the sitcoms out nowadays just don't provide a lot of mental stimulation for me. Ok, I know, most of you are thinking, "Mental Stimulation? You?". But truly I was once a literate person with big flowing words in my head and tons of intelligent things to say. Then BAM! I had a child and I can barely form a legible sentence. I told my DH tonight that I was glad that I decided to drop out of the running for medical school right now as it would of been embarrassing. Of course I am wondering about if I should try and get my masters in English. I have always wanted to do that in addition to med school. Yeah, right, I should just worry about getting a thought into my blog that makes sense.

But back to my original line of thought, would I survive in a rural area in which my prized material possessions were the clothes on my back? Would I be able to eat the dog roaming around the street? Would I be able to exist in the infrastructure of men over women? But do I feel that I wouldn't be able to survive because of how I have been raised in society today? I am sure that if I grew up and that was all that was known to me I would be fine. Knowing what I know now, I don't know if I have enough skills to fend for myself. I know that I probably could grow my own food (eating the family dog, ummm no), no indoor plumbing I could deal given that I have roughed it many a time at a horse show, scraps for clothes...fine no big fashion guru types these words to you now, and hard work...ok I can do that. So maybe I would be better off than I thought. Oh female subservience, there we are. My DH snickers at the thought of me bending to anyone's command. He's right though. I fight him now and most of the time the most dominating thing he says is put the dishes away they are clean. How sad is that? I get annoyed when i watch shows and the woman bows to the guy, I am on the sidelines shouting and raising my fist at him for her. I am one of those people who would of been shot or taken out because of my mouth. So that might be a slight issue for me.

I didn't get any stitching done today which is rather annoying to me, I have vowed to make time to do a few stitches a day at least. We ran out of time today though. We had a birthday party for my mom, brother, aunt and uncle whose birthdays all fall within this month. This month really breaks the bank for me. I have to be better about spending money, i have let things get a little out of hand lately and i have to stop. I need to rein myself in a bit. I wanted to have one of my credit cards paid off this year and at the rate i am going it isn't going to happen. I have been kitting things up like crazy and i have to stop. I have so many projects kitted that it is insane to think i would ever complete them in my life time. My DH is going to kill me when we move and he sees all that i have hidden in my craft closet.

Anyone reading this who can tell me how to get the middle column where my posts are, a little bit wider, please e-mail me. Pharlapjr@yahoo.com I am done with it for the night!

On a side note, I am really rather (still) frustrated with my weight. I know that i am eating more right now because i am unhappy with my job. I have to fix this. I always eat when i am irritated or upset. It drives me crazy because i know that i am doing it and i know i hate the way that i feel after i eat things i shouldn't. I am normally such an active person. i have never and never will be a skinny person. I just don't have the bone structure for it. I used to really be upset with myself over this, but since being pregnant and having said DS I would give anything for the body before i had him. I used to be SO fit and healthy. Of course i could not ever hope to attain that level of fitness right now as it was a result of 14 hours a day 7 days a week in the saddle and lifting heavy things, walking tens of miles a day, etc at the barn. But i would be happy with some form of fitness. I am trying, but i will be honest i am not trying hard enough. It is all my fault and i do take full responsibility for my inactiveness. I do occasionally get out and walk 3 miles with my DS, but pushing that heavy stroller up some of those hills, kills me and just takes the fun out of the walk. Not to mention the stepping on the lower bar of the stroller is irritating so i have to shorten my stride, which i don't like. I tried a jogger stroller and i like the leg clearance, but who made these things without turnable front wheels? Obviously not someone who uses it on any street in the US. Plus do we buy a one or a two child one? We are planning and trying for a second child so do we drop a couple hundred on a one child or much much more on the two child one? So for now we aren't buying one as money is a problem and we need to save for a bigger house.

I get frustrated with myself though. i can mentally be motivated to do things, but then talk myself out of it for stupid reasons that i regret later. Or i will be motivated to go on a walk or something after work, but will talk myself out of it at the time because i don't have my shoes, blah blah. Stupid stuff. Somedays i can get myself up, but i really wonder what happened to that person who worked so many hours before at the barn and never really thought much about what she was doing? I guess she is lost and in her place is a hopeless lazy person. I guilt myself a lot for not getting more done in a day, but i know that i get a lot done, it just isn't necessairly all that i wanted to do. I know that i try to live each day to somewhat of the fullest as i really do not want my last day on the earth to be spent watching tv. Also i don't want my DS to pick up such bad habits and laziness and i know that they see this from the start. So i get him outside a lot, but i don't take him to the barn. We have som mean dogs there and they will hurt a small child regardless of adult supervision, i can't have that. They run free around the farm so i can't stop them so for now he stays home when i am at the barn. Later maybe i will bring him out although i don't intend to push the horses, if he is interested then i will assist.

I also have been very short with my DH as of late. I don't know why. I think and may be sure that it is because of my unhappiness at work that is making me this way. I mean i went from studying to become a surgeon to this a job that i so do not enjoy. I never intended this to be a life long position only intended for it to get me through school and now that that has been derailed i feel stuck. I am lack-lusterly looking for another job, but night jobs are few and far between and the pay here is great. But i am taking all this out on my DH. Now he is pretty good about taking my bad moods, which as of late have been quite a few, and just letting me be. I can tell that it is wearing on him though. Sometimes though he asks the dumbest questions, that in my mind he should really know the answer to and it drives me crazy that he can't think for 2 seconds and figure it out. Of course, he says i do the same thing to him, which may be true, honestly lately i have no memory. I swear having DS took away my ability to remember anything and it is frustrating. More frustrating to have DH come back and say that i said something and now i am contradicting it and i know that he is probably right, but i can't freakin' remember!

*sigh* it has to get better than this. If my memory doesn't improve we may have to get that fixed along with the boobs and the tummy tuck i am planning on having after 4 kids. I know that after this one things have already headed south and if they head much farther we may have to have surgery after each one!

It has been quite sometime since i have done any blog updating. This hasn't been for a lack of things to say, more just a lack of time to say it in. They have me training for my new position here at work on my Mondays and Fridays, which means that my prime internet time is gone. I can't very well sit and check the BB with someone right next to me looking over my shoulder. Have i mentioned that i am one of 3 girls on my shift in this department? Not too many of the guys here are sympathetic in the stitching department, wait what am i thinking, none of the guys are... I stitch here at work, but they still tease me about it and i think they would have a field day with my bb habit. Of course let's not mention that "training" does mean that i should be technically learning something. So i am not, but that is only because i didn't ask for this. Of course, they are phasing out my position so i should be glad that my managers love me enough to try and train me in this other crap. So needless to say no blog updating or e-mailing at all while i am training. Then i never get a chance to do any blogging on my weekends as i am always running around and then when i sit a moment i make myself at least stitch something. So no 'puter time there.

Although how many people really wait on the edge of their seats for the next installment of my menial blog? Ehh i am sure no one.

Cool news is that I was contacted by a designer about doing some model stitching and i am SO excited about it. He has the most beautiful flossies as well. So i am fairly excited as i thought no one would ever ask me to do this for them. The best thing is that he is willing to help me learn Hardanger and i have wanted to learn that forever. So yeah me! I am hoping to get a few more model jobs since i have all this time at work to do them in. I am excited though.

I have gotten most of The Cook done and am just finishing up the green cabinet behind him. I have done the backstitching as i went along so when i finish this green i will be done. I am glad too as i need to start on one of the four Animal Babies that i signed up for for July's theme. I want to get at least two done by June.

I have stitched a bit on the new version of Lady Death and am quite happy with how the colors are turning out. I do think that some of the purples that are in the red area are not the best choices, but i am going to do a square and see what i think before changing them.

On another note i am pretty peeved that the PC Stitch help department has not answered any of my e-mails regarding help on using their software. They used to be really good for answering, but i sent them a list of questions i had on incorporating some more DMC colors and whatnot as well as a blended floss pallette and nothing no answer. It has been 3 weeks. More than enough time if you ask me.

Oooh and my DS took his first unassisted steps today much to my amazement. I was so thrilled. Of course my DH's first words were "Did you tape it?" Umm no i don't sit and watch him through the camera all day waiting for him to do something new. *sigh* but he did it again for his daddy and he didn't film it either. "Well i didn't think he would do it again." Yeah, uh-huh, right.

Stitchers Five for the week of Monday 12 April 04

With thanks to AngelSan for the inspiration for this week's questions.

Favourite Themes:

1. What is your favourite theme to stitch (i.e. primitive, fantasy, samplers, etc)
This is a hard one i am torn between fantasy, samplers and horses. Can i say all of those?

2. Has this always been your favourite theme (i.e as your tastes change)?
Yes i would have to say that fantasy and most horse ones have always been my favorite, but i have just recently fallen in love with samplers.

3. How many WIPs/UFOS do you have currently in this theme?
Yeah i can say none to this.

4. And how many finished?
Ok, well none, but i have many kitted to go. I work way too much on things for other people and their tastes don't mirror my own.

5. Name three favourite designs in your overall favourite theme.
Sweet Pea Gazebo - Victoria Sampler
Fire and Ice - Kustom Krafts
Any from TW as i love all the blending and whatnot that is combined to make such stunning pieces.