Fantastic Four #347

TITLE: Fantastic Four #347

PUBLISHER: Marvel Comics

COVER DATE: December 1990

COVER PRICE: $1.00

23 pages


WHAT I REMEMBER...

There's two things that I remember about this issue. One of them, it turns out, I've remembered incorrectly.

I'd always assumed that this issue was the start of Walter Simonson's run on Fantastic Four. I'd read a little bit of the Fantastic Four here and there, but never followed it with any sort of regularity. This issue was the start of me buying this title on a monthly basis, and I guess I always attributed that fact to jumping on at the beginning of Simonson's run, but it turns out that he started his tenure on this title back on issue #334!

As much as I hate to admit it, I guess I jumped on with this issue because it had Wolverine and Ghost Rider in it. Don't judge me...it was the early 90's and I was a naive comic book reader.

Luckily for me this was an awesome issue in the middle of an awesome run. Which leads me to the second thing I remember about this issue, which was that it turned me into a Fantastic Four fan. To put it more correctly, I guess I should say it turned me into a frustrated fan as Simonson would be off the title only eight months later.

To me, Simonson set the bar incredibly high with his run. Yes, It was wacky, goofy, and tongue in cheek; but most of all it was intelligent and incredibly entertaining at the same time. Not many other creators have managed to achieve that balance, which is why my collecting history with the title is full of holes.

The closest we probably got was with Waid and Wieringo's tenure earlier in the decade, which unfortunately had it's consistency marred by some overactive editorialial influence. John Byrne had a highly entertaining run, but I don't know how intelligent it actually was, while Hickman's run currently is striving for intelligent, but leaving the fun behind. I've never read any of Stan and Jack's original run (I know, I know...I'll get around to it someday), but I can only assume that it hit the mark seeing as how they were the ones that defined the target.

To me, Walter Simonson's short run is the apex of greatness, and the fact that there are twelve more issues that I never knew existed before today have me chomping at the bit to go do some longbox shopping tomorrow. In the meantime, however, we'll tide ourselves over rereading this issue.

Big Trouble On Little Earth!

• Writing: Walter Simonson
• Penciling: Arthur Adams
• Inking: Art Thibert
• Lettering: Bill Oakley
• Coloring: Steve Buccellato
• Editing: Ralph Macchio
• Editor in Chief: Tom DeFalco

This issue begins in space, as the silence between the Earth and the Moon is broken by the arrival of a damaged ship that emerges from lightspeed, only to crash land on Earth.

The attractive female pilot (hey, she's drawn by Art Adams...she's gonna be pretty) escapes with her life, swearing vengeance on those that betrayed her and marooned her on Earth.

We'll find out exactly who (and what) she is in a bit, but first let's check in with the Fantastic Four at Four Freedoms Plaza who are enjoying some down time after being away for the last couple of weeks. Like any typical family, however, there's some dysfunction hiding in the background.

Johnny seems to be infatuated with an alien woman that they met a few issues back, even though he's married to Alicia Masters. Johnny Storm married...I had forgotten all about that.

A human Ben Grimm seeks to console his girlfriend, Sharon Ventura, who is currently She-Thing and trapped in her rocky form. She-Thing...I had forgotten all about that.

That right there is the sign of a good writer. You got two things that by all rights should hamper your ability to tell a good Fantastic Four story, and he makes 'em work. So much so, that I had completely forgotten that they were even an issue.

Seeking to take advantage of everyone's distracted attentionzs, our mysterious crash survivor arrives at Four Freedoms Plaza. Using her ability to change shape and her telepathy, she easily slips inside and begins to take the FF down one by one.

Changing her from into Nebula, Johnny's blue-skinned alien infatuation from earlier, she appears before him and gets close enough to shock him into unconsciousness with a hand held taser device.

Similarly, she does the same thing to Ben. Only this time appearing as Johnny's wife, Alicia Masters, his old flame who fell in love with Johnny when Ben was off-world. He obviously still has feelings for her, as the shapechanger is able to take advantage of that to get close enough to use the same device on Ben.

...and we all know the conflicted feelings that Sue has always had for Namor.

Second verse, same as the first...and down goes Sue to the shapechanger.

After drugging She-Thing with a knock-out brew of tea, the mysterious alien sets her sights on Reed. It turns out that the alien actually has a little crush on Reed, and takes the form of his wife to seduce him into unconsciousness.

Unfortunately for her, Reed is too quick and notices her deception and manages to bend his body away from her taser at the last second. As perceptive as he is, however, he's never been that good of a hand-to-hand fighter and he soon finds himself unconscious with the rest of the Fantastic Four before he can alert the Avengers.

Meanwhile, we find out exactly who the mysterious alien attacker was running from as a Skrull warship enters Earth orbit, hot on her trail.

Scanning the planet for De'Lila, they soon find a plethora of Skrull-like lifeforms centered on a small island in the pacific. Cloaking their ship, they head to the island to investigate. Unfortunately for them, that small island is none other than Monster Island, which they find out the hard way.

It turns out that the monsters of Monster Island all have a primitive Skrull like brain, which was the source of the Skrull life readings. The Skrull in charge seems less concerned about why that is, than with using that fact to his advantage to smoke out De'Lila from hiding. Using neural disruptor darts, they tag each monster and teleport it to various cities around the globe. Using the disruptors to increase the ferocity of the monsters, they hope to drive up the mental stress planet-wide and flush her out.

Little do they know, there's a monarch of Monster Isle...and he's none to happy about the current turn of events.

Still in the form of Sue, De'Lila uses the FF's computers to familiarize herself with Earth's superheroes. Reed's files are complete enough that they allow her to pick and choose among them a group of recruits with which she hopes to achieve her destiny. Using her telepathy she sends a mental summoning out to the four heroes who soon arrive at the door of Four Freedoms Plaza.

The Grey Hulk, Spider-Man, Wolverine, and Ghost Rider are soon brought in to see "Sue", who tells them the tragic (and altogether false) tale of how she returned home to find her home in ruins and the rest of the Fantasic Four dead or dying. Using one of her husband's inventions, she called to each of them to come to her aid to help avenge the recently deceased members of the Fantastic Four.

By now, the "new" members of the Fantastic Four have fallen for De'Lila's story and agree to help her find the monsters that did this. Playing right into her hand, she arms them with another of Reed's gadgets that will allow them to track down the energy signature of the attackers. Little do they know, the attackers they're being sent to hunt down are the Skrulls that are hunting De'Lila.

SO, WHAT DID WE LEARN...

This comic was as fun, if not more, than I remember. Maybe it's the fact that there is so little new Marvel that I find readable for three bucks anymore, that I'm starting to get nostalgic for the characters that I grew up with.

Or maybe it's the fact that it's been so long since I enjoyed a good Fantastic Four book, that this issue seems to shine a little brighter. Hell, it's been even longer since I've enjoyed a Wolverine book, that his brief appearance here actually made me miss the old canuck.

Whether it was any of those reasons, or an amalgam of others, this book just pleased me to no end. Even though the Fantastic Four get punked out relatively early in the book, it's got alot of the earmarks that make a great story...Skrulls, Monster Isle, crazy inventions, family drama, space travel, etc...

And speaking of the Skrulls...they're an antagonist I like best when they are played for laughs. They've never been the most dangerous of foes in the FF rogue's gallery, but they are entertaining none the less. The over-the-top inclusion of some of the 90's most overused guest stars let you know right away that this is going to be a fun issue. So with the Skrulls and Mole Man as the villains, we have the perfect blend of absurdity and comedy with which to have a little fun at their own expense.

This is the first part of a three parter, so unfortunately we have to spend most of our time setting things up. Luckily for us, we have Art Adams supplying the pencils for this issue, so even the dialogue heavy pages are fun to look at.

One thing that is distracting about the art, is that the combination of the paper quality and the coloring tended to give this book an over-saturated look on the page. I'd love to see this book recolored using today's technology, as I'm sure it would give Art Adams' beautiful pencils even more attention.

Now we just have to wait for the Randomizer to pick another book from this run, so that we can continue on with one of the best runs from the 90's. In the meantime, I'll be happily looking through some back-issue bins for the issues that I missed.

Holy crap! Simonson had Kang show up during his run?! How the heck did I miss that? Now I'm definitely hitting the comic book store tomorrow.

All characters and artwork reproduced are (c) Marvel Comics

Peter Parker, The Spectacular Spider-Man #110

TITLE: Peter Parker, The Spectacular Spider-Man #110

PUBLISHER: Marvel

COVER DATE: January 1986

COVER PRICE: $0.65

24 pages


WHAT I REMEMBER...

As I mentioned last time, I've never really been a huge Spider-Man collector. I enjoy the character well enough, but don't have the passion to follow his titles day in and day out. With that being said, it doesn't mean that I don't read 'em every now and again.

This issue holds a special place in my collection, as these four issues were the first Spider-Man books that I recall buying fresh off the racks. I remember enjoying his appearances in Secret Wars, and definitely thought his new costume introduced there was bad-ass, but for some reason it never spurred me to start picking up either of his two regular titles.

Eventually, however, I did buy a few issues and it was with this storyline that I started. I couldn't tell you what finally spurred me to buy a few, but I'm glad I did. This particular arc was pretty intense, compared to what else was out there at the time. It definitely struck a nerve, and when I think of good Spider-Man storylines, this one always jumps to the top.

It's actually been quite a while since I've reread it, so I'm curious to see how it holds up to today's standards. Peter David's one of the best writers out there, not super flashy by any means, but he's consistently good just about every time he puts pen to paper. I have faith that this issue won't disappoint, but still...this was Peter David's first comic book work, so the chance for some clunkiness is still out there.

Finally, with this issue Peter David takes the lead with the most issues reviewed by a writer here at the Random Longbox. The funny thing is, he did it with no help from his 10 year run on The Incredible Hulk, of which I have the whole shebang just waiting to be picked for a review sooner or later. He's got a ways to go before he catches up to Curt Swan, who currently holds the record for most books reviewed, but with the sheer number of Peter David books I have in my collection it's bound to happen sooner or later.

All My Sins Remembered

• Writer: Peter David
• Layouts: Rich Buckler
• Finishers: M. Hands
• Colorist: Bob Sharen
• Letterer: Rick Parker
• Editor: Jim Owsley
• Editor-in-Chief: Jim Shooter

The conclusion to the Death of Jean DeWolff storyline begins as both Spider-Man and Daredevil are racing to the home of J. Jonah Jameson to avenge the death of Betty Brant at the hands of the Sin-Eater. Little does Spider-man know, however, that Betty is not quite dead yet as she managed to duck under JJJ's desk as the Sin-Eater fired his shotgun.

Just like he killed a priest who opposed capital punishment and a judge who coddled criminals, he has come to take down JJJ because he's against the idea of masked vigilantes. While not having any particular beef with Betty, he promises to kill her so that she can deliver a message to Jonah in the afterlife.

Betty shows she has a little life left in her as she grabs a letter opener and stabs him in the leg. That maneuver buys her a few moments, which is all she needed as Spider-Man comes crashing through the window and is surprised to see her alive.

The thought that Betty was dead, coupled with the other senseless deaths brought about by the Sin-Eater, have pushed Spider-Man to the edge. He arrived before Daredevil, and while he's fighting solo he shows a level of bloodlust that Peter rarely shows.

The Sin-Eater doesn't really stand a chance against an enraged Spider-Man, and now unmasked he's at his mercy. He apologizes to Spider-Man, but it's too late. Spider-Man tells him to save his apology for the one who deserves it, Jean DeWolff!

It's at this point that Daredevil catches up to him and sees Spider-Man on the verge of beating the Sin-Eater to death. He jumps in between the two, as Sin-Eater is obviously defeated, but Spider-Man will not be brought out of his bloodlust quite so easily. With Daredevil now between him and his prey, he becomes the new target of Spider-Man's rage.

Daredevil uses this to his advantage and taunts Spider-Man into following him as he leads him away from the Sin-Eater. Leading him away frm Jonah's house, Daredevil keeps him distracted enough that he is able to get a few lucky blows in and pummels him into subconsciousness.

Over the next couple of pages we get an awful lot of exposition that brings us up to speed with the chain of events that brought us here, so here's the super quick rundown.

The Sin-Eater was none other than Stan Carter, the actual police detective in charge of catching the Sin-Eater! With him in custody, the citizens of New York are not happy as they now have reason to fear both the criminals and the police. The rest of the force is put on alert as demonstrations start to crop up outside of police headquarters.

Jonah returns from his business trip to the news that Spider-Man has saved the life of his wife and secretary in his very own home. That's one more debt that JJJ owes Spider-Man that will more than likely go unpaid.

Back at police headquarters, we get more backstory about Stan Carter as they are visited by a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. He informs the police chief that Carter was a test subject in a drug enhancement program earlier in his career. It seems S.H.I.E.L.D. was experimenting with their own version of a super soldier serum. It worked, but also had unstable and unpredictable side-effects. The program was deemed too dangerous and was mothballed.

All of this new info means that it's possible that Stan Carter will be able to avoid responsibility on an insanity plea. That's the last thing this city needs to hear about.

The police decide to transfer the Sin-Eater to Riker's Island, and it's here that we catch back up with Spider-Man and Daredevil. Watching the transfer from a nearby rooftop, they debate the difference between justice and vengeance. Spider-Man still sees a big difference between what he does and what the Sin-Eater did. Daredevil is trying to show him that everyone deserves their day in court, even the Sin-Eater, whom Spider-Man was unwilling to give that option earlier in the story.

It's an argument left for another time, as the demonstrators on scene have succumb to mob rules and decide to take out the Sin Eater. Daredevil jumps down to protect him, but Spider-Man is still hesitant to expend any effort to protect the Sin-Eater.

The wild mob proves too much for Daredevil's heightened senses and hey are soon overpowered. He's at the mob's mercy as he calls out to Spider-Man for his help. What catches him by surprise, is that Daredevil called him by his first name!

With the death of his uncle and Gwen Stacy still hanging over him, Peter finally swings down to help out Daredevil as another innocent life lost on his watch would be too much to bear. Together they disperse the mob and get Carter secured at Riker's.

With everything wrapped up, Peter and Matt have a little unfinished business. Matt explains that he was able to use his enhanced hearing to figure out that Peter Parker and Spider-Man shared the same heartbeat and were the same man. He lets Peter know his secret identity as Matt Murdock, and the debate about justice and the law is back on...albeit on more friendly terms now.

Luckily for them, I guess, one of Aunt May's elderly friends has done something rather rash. It seems that in all of the recent simmering civil unrest, one of her friends took his old service pistol on the subway and shot three young punks who were hassling him.

Why is that lucky? For now Matt Murdock will demonstrate how the court system uses law to administer justice fairly by arranging representation for Aunt May's friend.

SO, WHAT DID WE LEARN...

...not even Peter David was able to escape the first time writer's curse of too many words. Granted, this was a different time and stories were told in a different fashion, but the story really hit a brick wall about half-way through as it shifts gear from slug-fest to morality tale of civil unrest.

The moral turmoil that Peter goes through seems a little heavy-handed, but not having re-read the previous three parts, I'm willing to give Peter David the benefit of the doubt that it got set up more thoroughly along the way.

Still, wordy as it was in parts, I like what he was trying to do with comparing and contrasting the extremes of masked vigilantes. Bringing in Daredevil to play, pardon the pun, devil's advocate for the justice system was a nice touch.

The art by Buckler and Hands was good, but also seemed to miss a step once the story switched gears. The fight against Sin-Eater and the showdown between Spidey and DD was very well rendered, but as soon as the exposition starts the artwork got a lot rougher and less defined. It was a vast difference from the first half, and definitely took me out of the story for a moment or two.

I'd forgotten that this was the issue where they learned each other's secret identity, so that was a pleasant surprise. Even more so, as it's a stark contrast to the state of the Marvel Universe over the last 5 years or so where everyone distrusts everyone and deals with the devil have rendered all of this moot anyway.

That's the great thing about longboxes, as we'll always have the good old days right at our fingertips.

All characters and artwork reproduced are (c) Marvel Comics

Related links for your surfing pleasure...

• Rich Buckler's official websites here and here
• Peter David's official website
• The Hipster Dad takes a spoiler-free look at an old copy of the trade collection
• Tom at the Fortress of Soliloquy once posted about this storyline too

...and the winner is?

It's time to check in real quick and find out the answer to the 2nd edition of everyone's favorite internet gameshow What Did I See While I Was Out Driving Around Last Week?

Click over here for the original post, but here were our choices.

• Spider-Man swinging on a web waving the American flag
• Captain America standing tall amidst the rubble of 9-11
• Superman standing tall with a bald eagle perched on his arm

Well the masses spoke and I had a massive 300% increase in the number of players, so congratulations to everyone who voted as you're all winners in my book.

Alas, the rules and bylaws of the Random Longbox Prize Commission clearly state that there can be only one winner. So what was the correct answer? Let's find out...

That's right, it's Spidey representing the old red, white and blue!

As if that wasn't enough fun, now it's time to announce the winner. We actually had two correct guesses, so way to go two-thirds of our respondents!

Unfortunately, no one was secure enough in their response to leave a forwarding address, so the grand prize of Incredible Hulk #340 goes back in the prize hopper for next time.

Normally at this time, we'd be picking a new random book to review, but there was actually one more story in Marvel Comics Presents #84 that we have to get to first. It's a quick little tale featuring Firestar, Freedom Force, and Mystique. Hopefully I'll be able to take care of that later on today, so stay tuned.

Odds and sods

• George Tuska dead at 93. The Random Longbox encountered him only once so far, and it was an issue that meant a lot to me. Thanks George.



• Joe Rosen has also passed away, sadly none of his lettering art has made it's way through our website...yet.



• Posting has been light lately, my apologies. I made the decision to get caught up on a bunch of reading after the RL headquarters was quarantined with the croup. Expect regular posting to resume shortly.



• While rereading the Conan issue, I found the Stan's Soapbox column to be kind of entertaining. In it, he's crowing about how James Cameron has just signed on to do the new Spider-Man movie, as well as spearhead the X-Men cartoon franchise. I know that Stan tended to get carried away on his soapbox, but he even teases that when Cameron finishes all of that, he's going to do the live action X-Men film as well. Ahhhh, we were such naive film-loving, comic book fans in the early 90's.



• During my aforementioned reading marathon, I read the first six issues of The Unwritten, and damn if that wasn't the best kickoff to a series that I've read in a long time. Carey, Gross, and Vertigo have another solid title on their hands. Let's just hope it keeps an audience.

DC/Marvel: All Access #1

TITLE: DC/Marvel: All Access #1

PUBLISHER: DC/Marvel

COVER DATE: December 1996

COVER PRICE: $2.95

38 pages


WHAT I REMEMBER...

There's not too much I remember about this series, other than the fact that at the center of it all was Access. And for the 99% of everyone out there who has never heard of him, he was the character that kept the Marvel and DC universes from merging again...or was that Joe Quesada.

Anyway, I think by this point the Marvel/DC crossovers were just becoming a money grab, not really motivated by a need to tell any great story. The first series was more novelty than story, but it was fun and interesting and new for the time. It had been a while since we had seen any crossovers between the two companies, so a new generation got to answer the age-old question of who could beat who.

Of course, by the time it was all over we had three mini-series and two dozen one-shots all over two years or so. That's "zombie cover" level saturation, and quarter boxes haven't been the same since.

That's not to say that some of the one shots weren't good, as I remember enjoying a couple of them. Bruce Wayne Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. with art by Cary Nord...Karl Kesel and Mike Wieringo on Spider-Boy...Mark Waid and Dave Gibbons on Super Soldier...

Fortunately for us, Kurt Busiek and George Perez would eventually go on to show how great an intercompany crossover could be with JLA/Avengers. If you're only going to read one crossover, make it this one. Better yet, try to track down one of the great oversized hardcover collections, as Perez's artwork really shines in an enlarged format.

But we're not here to look at that book, so let's just get started and get this over with.

The Crossing!

• Story: Ron Marz
• Layouts: Jackson Guice
• Finishes: Josef Rubinstein
• Letters: Bill Oakley
• Color: Lee Loughridge
• Separators: Digital Chameleon
• Associate Editor: Chris Duffy
• Editor: Mike Carlin

This issue is basically one big slug-fest, so let's cut right to the score card.

ROUND ONE
Access lives in the Marvel Universe...

WIN: DC

ROUND TWO
An over-exposed, 90's era Venom escapes to the DC Universe...

WIN: Marvel

ROUND THREE
Ooohh...mullet Superman...

WIN: Marvel

So three rounds in, and Marvel is beating DC with the score 2 to 1. It's still early, so let's see what DC does to regain the momentum.

ROUND FOUR
Blatant crotch shot...

WIN: The reader...I guess?

And what are you looking at, Superman statue head? Let's keep your head in the game, shall we?

ROUND FIVE
Superman tells Access to talk to the hand...

WIN: DC

ROUND SIX
Venom uses the old "boy scout" slur against Superman...

WIN: Marvel

At the end of the sixth round, Marvel maintains a slight lead with the score 3-2-1.

ROUND SEVEN
Superman needs a save from Spider-Man...

WIN: Marvel

ROUND EIGHT
Both Superman and Spider-Man manage to ignore Access...

WIN: The reader

ROUND NINE
Venom gets the upper hand on both Spider-Man and Superman at the same time..?

WIN: DC

DC gets that last point by default, as you would expect Spider-Man to be able to take Venom down at this point on his own. The fact that he can't seem to do it with Superman's help, for god's sake, costs Marvel a point.

So that makes the score 4-3-2, with Marvel barely holding the lead over DC with the reader coming in third.

Let's head to the final stretch to see how it all shakes out.

ROUND TEN
Access bursts in to save the day...

WIN: Marvel and DC

Technically, Access is jointly owned by both Marvel and DC so they can both claim a point here. Then again, Marvel and DC's most popular heroes had to be rescued by a character created to sell a 90's event, so I should really be subtracting a point.

That makes the score 5-4-2, with Marvel still leading.

ROUND ELEVEN
Access leaves with Spider-Man...

WIN: DC

ROUND TWELVE
Yea! It's over!

WIN: The reader, without a doubt.

Not so fast...

ROUND THIRTEEN
Aaargh...spoke too soon!

WIN: Definitely not the reader.

SO, WHAT DID WE LEARN...

Let's tally up the final score and see how everything panned out.

• Marvel: 5 points
• DC: 5 points
• The Reader: 2 points

I think that's pretty much a snap shot of the comic industry in the 90's.

Marvel and DC hog the market for just about all that it's worth, leaving the reader with little to nothing to grasp on to for entertainment.

Ron Marz and Jackson Guice try their best with this series, but in all honesty, I just didn't sense any passion here. It was a by-the-numbers story that doesn't do much to grab the reader.

It's got all the big splash pages you'd expect from a Superman/Spider-Man/Venom fight, but not much else.

All characters and artwork reproduced are (c) Marvel and DC Comics

Related links for your surfing pleasure...

• Supermanfan.net takes a look at the first meeting of Superman and Spiderman
• ...and the second

Comic Book Review: Amazing Spider-Man #372

TITLE: The Amazing Spider-Man #372

PUBLISHER: Marvel

COVER DATE: January 1993

COVER PRICE: $1.25

23 pages


WHAT I REMEMBER...

I've followed Spider-Man off and on for the last couple of decades. I remember one of my first issues that I bought off the rack was a McFarlane issue during the Assassination Plot storyline. I think that had to be right around he time where he left the book, as most of my early Spider-Man memories are with Erik Larsen and Mark Bagley artwork.

I have all of the Erik Larsen issues and really enjoyed his run, so when Mark Bagley took over next it was no big deal as his style complimented Larsen's at the time. I stuck around for a while after that, but I don't remember too much if I really enjoyed them, or if they were any good. What I do recall is their being a lot of gimmicks around this time.

There was cover gimmicks...oh were there cover gimmicks. When was the last time we saw a holographic foil cover!

There was plot gimmicks...oh were there plot gimmicks. Peter Parker's parents alive!

And there was villain gimmicks...oh were there villain gimmicks. Hey, we got Venom! And if you think Venom is cool, wait until you see Carnage! If that isn't enough, wait until we put them in a 12-part crossover. Still with us? Then wait until we introduce Scream!

Needless to say, it wasn't too much longer before I bailed on the Spider-Man titles for close to ten years. So long story short...was the Bagley run any good? There was so many gimmicks that I can't remember the actual substance.

Though there is only one way to find out...

Arachnophobia Too!

• Writer: David Michelinie
• Penciller: Mark Bagley
• Inker: Randy Emberlin
• Colorist: Bob Sharen
• Letterer: Richard Starkings
• Editor: Danny Fingeroth
• Editor in Chief: Tom DeFalco

Part 5 of 6 of the Ultimate Spider-Slayers storyline line opens up with the main villain, Alistair Smythe, emerging from the shadows. He's in the middle of a perfectly Blofeld-esque monologue as he announces himself "The Ultimate Spider-Slayer" as he comes fully into the light.

Just who exactly Alistair Smythe is, is never made abundantly clear in this issue. I have no recollection of his name, nor that of the Ultimate Spider-Slayer, so either my memory is really shot or he never quite caught on. My guess is that he was a minor character in some fashion over the previous couple of years, who somehow blames Spider-Man for his predicament and is now taking his revenge on him. But again, that's just a guess.

Smythe has recently escaped from incarceration, and brought some of the asylum inmates with him to help design robotic spiders with which to get his revenge on Spider-Man. If it were me, I think I'd rather want revenge on whomever designed that rather unfortunate looking robo-chair.

Meanwhile, back in Forest Hills, Peter Parker and Felicia Hardy are returning to Aunt May's house after defeating a robotic spider last issue. Peter's parents, who have recently returned from the dead, are being led into a car by the F.B.I. Something doesn't sit right with Peter, so he throws a spider tracer on the car so that he can follow them later.

I don't think Peter's going to need it however, as my guess is that the F.B.I. agent's not going to be too hard to find. If he didn't seem to notice a car practically bump into his rear fender, with a grown man emerging and rather dramatically throwing something at his car...he's probably not going to be driving in zig-zags trying to lose any tails. Hell, he's probably got a sign on the top of his car that says "FBI Driver in Training".

After getting the runaround from the local F.B.I. office, Peter decides to follow up as Spider-Man with the Black Cat along for ride (or swing). This is the first panel we get this issue of Spider-Man in action, and Mark Bagley does a bang-up job with a nice looking panel. Nothing flashy, but it sure is pretty nonetheless.

Did I mention that we are on part five of a six part storyline? Because this next panel has me slightly confused. Spider-Man and Black Cat are swinging through they city as Spider-Man reaches out and webs a giant mechanical spider. He comments that

now that we know these mechanical spiders are what Smythe uses to spot Spider-Man -- it's a lot easier to neutralize them.

Really? It only took you five issues figure out that maybe the giant mechanical spiders you keep running into are tied into Smythe's master plan? It seems rather obvious to me, and I just jumped into this story 5 pages ago!

Well they don't go three more panels before they find another one. They move in for the attack, and are ambushed by a robotic Tarantula and Scorpion. They do battle for a couple of pages, and just as Spidey and the Black Cat think they got 'em on the run, they pull a Voltron and come back as one giant spider-robot.

A little team-work is called for as Black Cat uses her claws to carve out a gash wide enough for Spider-Man to shove some live electrical wires into the giant robot's belly. It's insides are fried and melted, and victory comes...but at a price. The Black Cat got too close and took part of the electrical charge. She decides to stay back and recover some, as Spider-Man presses on to find his parents.

Peter ditches the Spider-Man costume, so as to not attract anymore unwanted gigantic robotic spiders, and trails his parents to an abandoned meat packing factory. They are being held at gunpoint by the F.B.I. agent, who is busy giving his monologue about his master plans and how the Parker's have messed it up. It involves a fake red skull and faked deaths and double crosses and I actually got bored trying to make heads or tails of it. Let's press on.

Obviously, the best way for Peter to overhear all of this was to listen from the wooden rafters above them. Did I mention that this was an abandoned warehouse? I'm sure it's been a while since any maintenance was done on those rafters. I wouldn't put my whole weight on those if I were you, Pete. Whoopsie!

Peter falls to the floor, reluctant to use his powers to save him so that he doesn't give away his secret identity to his parents. That wasn't the wisest of moves, as he falls through some pipes carrying Freon, freezing him just enough that he can't move to get off of the conveyor belt that is inching him towards the fully ignited rendering furnace. Did I mention that this was an abandoned meat packing factory?

Maybe this double-crossing F.B.I. Agent isn't so hapless after all, if he can fire up a blast furnace in an abandoned factory.

We'll have to wait until next issue to see how Peter gets his way out of this one, but before we go we have the back-up story to read.

Punch...Counter-Punch

• Story: Al Milgrom
• Art: Aaron Lopresti
• Inks: Mark Stegbauer
• Letters: Steve Dutro
• Colors: Bob Sharen
• Editor: Danny Fingeroth
• Chief: Tom DeFalco

We open up with Peter and Flash Thompson decked out in protective gear facing off, ready to spar in a boxing ring. It only took 364 issues, but here's the rematch from their last sparring match.

Peter called Flash up to talk about his feelings about his parents suddenly reappearing, and what better venue to have a little emotional heart-to-heart than in the middle of a boxing ring. What do I know, as it only takes six pages for them to work out Pete's problems opening up to his parents, as well as getting to the bottom of why Flash bullied Peter back in high school.

Peter gets sucker-punched during a tender revelation by Flash, but I guess that's alright as they're even now. The story ends with a panel that guarantees you're reading a comic book with the Comics Code Authority stamp of approval on the cover, as they go and get a soda after the big rematch!

SO, WHAT DID WE LEARN...

Well, this was a lot more pedestrian than I remember this run of Spider-Man being. In fact, the writing was down right boring. This was a more serious Spider-Man than we're used to as well. Not to many one-liners or witty rejoinders. He tries, but none of them connect or brought about anything other than a groan. That's a shame, as I recall enjoying Michelinie stuff a little bit more than this. Maybe I caught him on an off issue, and he was saving up his best stuff from this era for the foil covers.

Mark Bagley is also relatively uneven on this issue. His Spider-Man panels are all pretty good and his story telling is spot on. Where I think the issues suffers a little is the acting and expressions of the regular people. It's not bad, it's just that I'm spoiled with the level of quality that he brought to Ultimate Spider-Man some eight years later.

The back-up story was decent enough for a back-up story. It's most notable in this day and age for an early look at Aaron Lopresti's artwork. He got his big break on Malibu's Sludge, which has a cover date of October 1993, so this is definitely some of his first stuff. We'll just be kind and call it a real diamond in the rough. On a side note, his recent work on Wonder Woman has been nothing short of amazing.

All characters and artwork reproduced are (c) Marvel Comics

Related links for your surfing pleasure...

• Aaron Lopresti's official website

Up next...Amazing Spider-Man!

All is well after the 4th of July holiday, just don't ask the Randomizer about the circuits that needed to be replaced after its fireworks display gone wrong. What the authorities don't know, won't hurt them.

It's back to work for America, and that includes the Randomizer, so let's get the next pick started...

It's Amazing Spider-Man #372 from Marvel Comics, January 1993!

We're back into unknown territory. After a couple of picks in a row that I remembered vividly, this one is a blank slate. It's Spider-Man, and it's Mark Bagley...and that's about all I remember.

Judging from the cover, it looks like we got Spider-Man and The Black Cat against some killer spider robots. Flipping through the issue, it would appear that we have a back-up story in here as well.

One quick note before we dive into this issue for the review...Of the 11 books that the Randomizer has chosen so far, 4 of them have had back-up features. That seems like a high percentage to me, as I'm pretty sure that there is nowhere close to 40% of my collection with back-up stories. Oh well, the Randomizer likes what it likes...carry on...