Viva la Vivāha

It is going to be a little more than two months since I've got married and I don't have a single post on the wedding stuff. Bad, no? Here are some salient points from the experience.

• The jee-i'm-actually-gonna-get-married feeling sunk in when Sindhu (my wife) & I started plan the look and layout of our wedding invitation. We had a simple design in mind and were particular on the colour, texture and feel of the invitation card & cover. Menaka, Eureka, Butterfly, Kalyani, Sankeshwara Papeir...it took a lot of running around to get what we wanted. We got there in the end.
• I totally relished the Maapla treatment at home. It is a super feeling of being the star of the show. You're lavished with attention from everyone. Want something? Just look up...and ten people will be hanging on to the word you say.
• Couple of days before the wedding, my brothers & I went for a grand beauty treatment to a men's parlour in Mandavali. I had the Groom's Special which had the full works - Diamond facial, bleach, scalp massage, haircut, manicure, pedicure etc. All this took the whole day! My brother found out how ticklish he's on his feet during his pedicure. He just couldn't sit still. The beauty trip was very relaxing and we were refreshed at the end of it.  Everything was great except that ghastly five-figure amount we got billed for their services. 
• My grand-dad had it. My dad had it. My uncle had it. My cousin had it too. But, more importantly, one Mr Kameshwaran from my favourite Thamizh movie had it. And I decided long time back I was gonna have it when it is my time. Janavasam. I had it. And I totally loved it.
• It was a typical Tambram wedding...peppered with the highs and extreme highs and thereof (emotionally speaking).
• People marry. Some re-marry. But you get married for the first time only once. Pah, wattey logic, you may say. The point is - when you do something which you can do only once, why not do it properly? I dug into my reserves of patience and cooperated with whatever rituals I had to do from my part. The motto was: Cooperate, don't kovama operate.
• Talking about doing things properly - the Sastrigal told us to NOT shake hands with anyone after Mangalya dharanam until he tells us to do so. "Nee avala mattum dhaan thodalaam. Vera yaaraiyum thoda pdaadhu. Purinjidhaa?" #haun. He informed the handshake ban to the audience through microphone. After the Thaali was tied, once the rain of akshadhai and flowers subsided, one Maama ignored the handshake ban and extended his hand with a megawatt smile only to be met with a huge NO from me. Not the one to be cowed away easily, Maama insisted again, the Sastrigal belted out a high decibel bark "Kozhandha correct-a kai kudukka maaten 'granono, yen padutharel! Apram vaango saar!". Got the nods of approval from junior sastrigals and the photographer.
• I got a candid photographer to cover the event. I closely followed some photographers who specialize in this and boy they are a creative bunch! Glad I had PV cover my wedding. Check out his work here.
• Panjakacham is an underrated men's garment. 
• My mum planned to put together a surprise video of me & Sindhu to be played after Janavasam. But poor thing was smashed for time with the wedding prep that she couldn't do much on apart from collating old photographs. She really wanted it to happen so I (with some help from my bro) made a video which was basically a time-line with photos from memorable stages/events in our life and some funny anecdotes thrown in. We played it after Janvaasam. Everybody loved it.
• Nalangu was a total riot. I sung this song. The family were in their element and reached resonant galaata frequency when I prompted them for chorus. I still wonder how they made me sing 3 songs (incl. a duet) compared to her two songs. I tell you, girls have this amazing ability to slither away from spotlight.
• We went to Seychelles for honeymoon.

Some changes happen gradually. Sometimes you acknowledge a change is taking place but you don't realise the change until a particular moment. During oonjal ceremony, I looked at the huge gathering of people around us. Before me were persons who were involved in my life in various degrees - like my 2nd standard Sanskrit teacher, cousins I used to play with, classmates, my aunts, my mum - people who were in some way from my birth, childhood, till that point in my marriage played a part in me being the person I am. Looking at them, I felt stock of the changes that has happened in my life. Its moments like these in my wedding and other moments that I am unable to put in words, but are imprinted in my mind far better than any HD camera can record, that made my wedding a happy and emotionally satisfying experience.

This = rand(thots, 1)

• Watched Unnai Pol Oruvan last weekend. A great movie. Unlike the friends I went with, I haven't seen the original, A Wednesday. I think having not seen the original helped me to appreciate movie on its own context without the inevitable comparison. While watching UPO, it took me a while to see Kamal as a common man. As the movie progressed, Kamal - the character - grew in me. Except for dialogues (only at some instances), every aspect of the movie was almost perfect. And no, I didn't find MohanLal's accent irritating. I actually liked it.
  

• Kamal proves, yet again, he is one of the few people to take Tamil Cinema to the next level. I really admire the brilliance and versatility of the man - not only as an actor - but as a movie maker. He is one of the few persons who really understands the medium called cinema. Legend!
  

• A friend sent me this clip. Chakri Toleti, director of Unnai Pol Oruvan, is in it. Funny clip.

• Things have been busy in work front. The last month has been a huge learning curve and greatly rewarding. Along with other stuff I've got running in parallel, I am happy that I've accomplished what I set to do.
  

• Weddings. Kalyanams. Engagement parties. Nichiyatharthams...September was full on!

• Later this month, one of my best friends, is getting married in Auckland. At last, I am attending a TamBram wedding after god-knows-how-many years. I cant wait for Oct 23rd. Ganesaaa!

• I hate time zones. Why do all my good friends have to live in different timezones. Hmph!
  

• I was at IKEA this weekend. I don't know what's with that place, it's my second visit there and I am writing about it again. Two things: I saw the biggest bathtub I've ever seen in my life. It was a size of a small lake. Massive. I also saw a slam-proof toilet seat. I tilted the toilet lid, and watched it slowly and noiselessly descend and close with faint click. The saleswomen pitching for the product looked very pleased. I asked her "do you have one that lifts automatically when someone approaches?", and immediately added "...and lowers when they depart?". The saleswoman gave a blank look and said "ahhh. no. sorry." Men can sometimes forget to lift the seat. This can cause a degree of domestic disharmony. I am sure IKEA will fully expound on the sales potential of the automatic seat lifting toilet. I wonder what's next?
  

• NZ playing Australia today in Champions Trophy final now. Go the Black Caps! Underdogs vaazhgha!

• I have not had Rasam for more than three weeks now. I am craving for hot thakaali rasam with poricha appalam.

• This weekend is gonna be a cookfest.
  

• I am brushing up my MATLAB skills. It's been 3 years since I've worked on MATLAB/Simulink. Hence the title of the post.
  

It's a guy thing

The above video is running hot on TV at the moment. It's an ad on blokes. It celebrates typical blokey moments and achievements. The ad glorifies different kind of blokes there are, namely:

a. Blokes who punch above their weight
b. Blokes who peaked at high school
c. Blokes built like a brick house
d. Blokes who've had their arm in a cow
e. Men who wont eat their quiche
f. Men who should have read the instructions

and many others. Very funny!

After my experience with my friends last week, I feel the ad missed one group. Guys who are part of this group - you know who you are - will be gutted that such hard-done by blokes have not been recognised. I am talking about the blokes who've been invited (in some cases dragged along) to a September weekend wedding. You may chuckle and say what's the big deal? Why is this category important? Let me explain.

The month of September is special. If you are girl and living in the southern hemisphere, you may say September means it is the spring season. That means flowers. Freshness. All bloom. Romance is in the air. September brings with it new life and new beginnings. Basically, the month of Sep has all ingredients for a perfect wedding.

If you are guy, September is special too. Unlike Ms CuddlyWink's exhaustive list, it's only for a handful of things. The list reads: four weekends, NRL finals and AFL Grand finals. All finals spread out in those four glorious September weekends. HE would either in front of the idiot box or in the battleground (the stadium). There is nowhere else he would want to be. The place is Holy Grail.

Last weekend, it was NRL's preliminary finals night. Along with the-colour-of-my-blood-is-rugby mates, I was at our friend's wedding (groom) on the game night. The wedding was great. I was very happy for the couple and everyone had a great time. A true bloke doesn't miss his friend's wedding. Full stop. Gazza, a common friend, recollected with a serious face, looking down at his shuffling feet, that even last year he missed the NRL final. All because "there were so many bleeeeping weddings in September man. Bleep". Along with the wedding gift, Gazza had planned to give the groom (our mate) a wedgie for choosing this particular time for the wedding ceremony. He spared him because the groom secretly confessed that he had the same feelings too. Instead of a wedgie, the groom received a bear hug from Gazza. Aww...the brotherhood!

During the pre-ceremony drinks, people were standing around in clusters chatting away, it was hard to miss the constant undercurrent footy talk in the conversations. Anything about anything was somehow related to footy. We did try our earnest for a work around to get the live scores. The problem was we were in a church at a small town in the outskirts of the city. The church was on a hill (awesome views of the city!) and we had to drive through dense rain forest to get there. Expectedly, the church didn't have AM radio reception, it had a GSM connection that would load live updates in time for my sashtiapdhapoorthi*, and a 3G network which wasn't strong enough to load the web page. Guys were squirming on their seats. If there were no one was watching us, we would've all yelled in unison "pichukhooo" and sprinted towards the nearest place showing the live telecast.

...and that's actually what we did, but only after the wedding ceremony (no we didn't yell. jees.). We made our way into a local run-down pub showing the game. The regulars in the pub said we were the most well-dressed men to ever set foot in the pub's long history. We watched the last few minutes of the game. Gazza shed a few tears. It was...hmm...a special moment for him. His team won. Nothing melts a true Aussie bloke faster than to see his team in the spoils of victory.

Like any wedding, everyone was decked in their finery's. We looked sharp. The ladies were gorgeous. It's amazing the amount of prep ladies put into weddings. So much that one girl told me that wedding is all about the bride. Considering the state we were in, I couldn't disagree with her more. I was about to say something (not about the trivial matter of footy finals), then stopped. But then...

Weddings have their own rules. We all know rules can always be bent, if not broken. You see, we have a problem here. We have to attend the wedding but we are also deprived of the Rugby. Perhaps we can find a way to incorporate both football and wedding in an innovative way. Maybe the priest can probably do a score update during the ceremony like, "Do you Joe Bloggs, take Mary Jones, to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, like a football which the New Zealand Warriors just landed over the try line to take the score to 16-14?"

Or, how about showing the live telecast (volume muted ofcourse) on a big LCD behind the bride at the reception. 100% attention guaranteed.

Or, how about this in a South Indian wedding. Imagine there is a ODI going LIVE between India and Australia. The sastrigal defies conventions and recites this informative Mangalayam Thanthuna nena

getti melam! getti melam!

(in ARR's tune for Mangalyam Thathuna nena)

Manglayam thanthuna nena

Australiaaa two eighty nine
Indha game-a nambha jeyikkhaa,
Tendulllkar adikanum sadham.

I am just saying...

:D

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* Sashtiapdhapoorthi - celebration of 60th birthday