but~~

"but"

a simple word yet important...

because it can connect two sentence become one...

and...

1. can give the fire heart become cool~~

how??

by saying in word...

" i have no money, no home, not working yet, not that rich BUT i love u and want to marry u now"

and

2. can give the great feeling become down, such as~~

"i love u and want to marry u now BUT i have no money, no home, not working yet"

can u spot the different??

just a thought for me today!!!

BUT....

love for Allah doesn't ask u to sacrifices anything(money,home,time,life) but only your pure n sincere heart...

and because of that pure and sincere heart u actually want to give everything to Allah swt...

got my point??

i do wrong things...and i don't know how to turn back time...

and i want to continue with the right thing, but i don't have the power to do so...

i will stuck in this place forever with the guilty feeling to Allah...

and i can't take it anymore...

crying everyday...

thatz all i can do...and trying hard to improve back my energy and feeling...

BUT~~~~

why i become so negative??

p/s: ayah masuk hospital lagi....and i really need someone to cry on...who can give her shoulder to me??

fuh~~

fuh~~sambil meletakan tapak tgn kanan ke dahi dan dr dahi perlahan2 bawak ke kanan dahi dan alihkan tgn...

banyak peluh???

1. klu banyak, maknenye anda da berusaha keras hari nie...tahniah!!!

2. klu xde peluh...meaning that anda masih ber relax2 wlupun ironinya kerja belambak...say what??(amik quote aiman azlan)hehe

banyak bende happen dlm hidup aq...

baik y aq tau, die tau, DIA tau mahupun ada y aq sendiri tak tau...

ape2 pun...aq buat kesilapan n keep repeat it...

why?? i even dont have the answer...

yup!! ade satu hadith berbunyi "org y beriman tidak akan jatuh 2 kali ke dalam luang yang sama"...

dan mase teringat hadith nie, aq rs jauhnye term beriman dlm hidup aq...

mmg aq masih punya Allah swt yang menyayangi dan Rasulullah saw y merindui...

namun klu aq keep repeat the same mistake over n over again...

aq mungkin akan kehilangan Allah n Rasul dlm hidup aq...

semoga kite dipermudahkan urusan dunia mahupun akhirat...insya-Allah...

kite sering buat kesalahan...namun hati dambakan syurga...

kite sering melanggar larangan Allah namun hati mahukan cintaNYA...

2-3 minggu aq fikir...layak kah aq??

ade satu bende y kite perlu kawal sgt2 dlm diri...

tau x??

itu la NAFS...nafs y baik bawak kite ke syurga dan sebaliknya....

satu bende y aq harus perbetulkan...

sebelum semuanya terlambat....

mungkin sudah tiba masanya aq bukan lagi ber status "single"...

semoga Allah permudahkan segalanya...ameen~~~

semoga hari2 pengorbanan y baru je lepas memberi 1001 kebaikan pada mereka y mencari hidayah Allah...dan untuk aq...

aq perlukan hari y baru untuk berubah...

takbir di rumah sempena raya haji....credit to my brother dzul...

p/s: aq rase berdosa y amat sgt...semoga aq tidak menjadi punca hidayah tidak smpai ke adik2...aq takut~~~ :'(

remind

a lots of things happen...

down, stress, tired....

a lot of assignment need to be settle in this week...

next week??holiday~~

am i happy??

no...why??

don't know...

i need to be strong....

to make everything back to normal...

insyaAllah....

p/s: walaupun die senyum, terasa berat dlm hati...mcm mane nk kembalikan senyumanya??

ISDK

lame nye tak update blog..ke x??haha

ape2 pun, byk sgt hal happen 4-5 hari nie...

and aq...serabut ar skit...haha

somehow life still need to move on...

serius JK a.k.a jiwa kacau but i'm cool~~hehe

back to my topic...

ISDK...ape tu??

pernah dgr ISK (Ini Sejarah Kita)??well, as u may see...

even my address is teamISK.blogspot...

tp ISDK nie istilah baru skit...

baru dapat dlm mukhayyam ikram gombak semalam kat kem nur laman bistari....

penyampai??my favourite ustaz: akhi faiz

sejak balik semananjung nie, nie 1st time dpt balik semangat bintulu...

terbaekk...akhawat lain dont be jeles..please...hehe

ok fine...what is ISDK??

ia adalah singkatan kepada "Ini Sejarah Datuk Kita"

amacam?? ada berminat...jom join tarbiyah!!!

dalam halaqah kite citer...hehe

erm, at least i got recover my broken heart...

yup...i need to focus on how to bring islam back in our life...

and not to put our self on fire of an-nar...

spirit bro...spirit!!!

HAMASATUSSHABAB!!!

mean semangat pemuda...wahh~~~berapi nie..hehe

alritez, utk anak2 baru (walaupun xjumpe lagi..hehe)

dalam halaqah kite share what is this ISDK...alritez??

untuk y lame pun bley je share...kite rehlah ke jaulah ke same2...xde hal~~

my pleasure to share this with all musleem in this world...

for who doesn't know me...

PM me...on number...waits....haha
just leave your comment la and email...cewah~~

promote2...

alritez...class calling, assigment waiting...terbaek~~

chow yo!!

p/s: baru beli phone baru...lihat gamba di bawah...haha..my mini galaxy!!

list

list means 1 number of items, names, etc., written or printed together as a record or aid to memory. 2 (in pl.) a palisades enclosing an area for a tournament. b scene of a contest. —v. 1 make a list of. 2 enter in a list. 3 (as listed adj.) a (of securities) approved for dealings on the Stock Exchange. b (of a building) of historical importance and officially protected.  enter the lists issue or accept a challenge. [Old English] - oxford dictionary

guess, there be a long time i'm not list up my task...

ok, let see...how busy i am:

1. designing tag for IASS (international agriculutre student symposium)

2. preparing some program book for IASS 2012

3. promoting IASS website for to all international university...

4. designing poster for agriculutre club

5. designing t-shirt for company

6. assignment current issue

7. final year project - not even discuss about what research that i want to do..
8. oh yeah...research method and quantitative exam~~next week

fuh...not even reach 10...guess not that much la..
however...all that 8 items not exactly an human priority job...

but if u not think that way...think back!!!

Allah not creating us to do that 8 items job...

for ALLAH sake, the answer NOOO.....

the priority is to be a musleem...

how??lets go to see what dakwah is all about...

go to: dakwah.info

whatever that all sahabat do a long time ago, thatz is exactly what we going to now!!!

no excuses...because why???

because....can't u see??

"betapa rosaknya umat" and i realize, how worse i am...

all that 8 item that i need to do, must not be the reason for not doing whatever Allah ask me to do...oh Allah, give me strength and never let me out from this path~~

passion to do whatever Allah ask, comes together with the perfect iman (faith)..

and the perfect iman comes together with great amal (action)...

and great amal come together with tsaqafah (knowledge)...

pray for everybody best!!!InsyaAllah...

_____________________________________________________

someone comeback from japan tomorrow...

have a safe great journey~~

welcome home....

excited already!!!

alritez...dhuhr(zohor) already...

chow yo....

yosh...

assalamualaikum~~

p/s: pray for everything goes as plan tomorrow...nervous~~

story

argh...got tense over and over and over again...
1st TEST COMING!!!!!

assignment keliling pinggang~~

ntah la....

and last nite i've got an accident...

mcm nie story die...

mase my frenz bawak krete, tetibe ade api jatuh depan krete tgh jalan...

ape lagi brek mngejut ar....

tau2 pakcik PJSD tu sibuk nk bakar sarang tebuan tp x blok jalan...

kureng betul...

dah tu kerete belakang pun brek..nasib sempat brek..xde la berlanggar...

da tu...kawan aq y bawak krete cuak dgn api terus nak reverse...

sakit tekak aq jerit ade krete kt blakang,

last2...dushhh...langgar gak...

da tu terjadilah situasi gelak2 y besar...

xteruk...tp kureng betul la pakcik PJSD tu...

haha, saje aq nk highlight kan PJSD tu...geram kot...

duit~~duit~~

tgh mlm, my coursemate call sebab risau...

da la br abis meeting...sian die...

die kate xmahal la setakat bumper kancil...dlm RM80 kot...

and plat dlmRM20 jugak...tp nti die follow up la...

anybody know the exact amount??hehe

and pg nie my best friend hntr msg:

"Assalamualaikum..

Sobahunnur..ohaiyo gozaimasu..slmt pg..

lets have a nice kick strt 4 2day..B)"

and sure...aq xbley balas msg sebab kredit da xde 3 hari...

so, jap lg nk p kelas...aq nk beli top up dulu...
penting tu...sebab byk msg2 akhawat y aq x dapat balas...

and ade la jugak my frenz y kecewe dgn aq...

aq xpernah harap org paham aq...

tp mmg bile masuk sem nie...keje aq byk sgt...

masalah byk sgt...dgn FYP lg....

seriusly, kdg2 give up jugak...

thankz to Allah swt cause always be with me...

the only one who understand me...

and seandainya aq give up dgn manusia pun,aq still ade Allah...

it just, aq je y xnk dgr cakap Allah selalu...

and aq nk cinta Allah je....and Rasulullah pun...

alrite...

nk p kelas...besok 1st test...

pray for everything will b fine...insya-Allah =)

chow yo...YOSH!!

p/s: aq rs ade org hecked my email plak la...benci giler...hari tu FB nie Email...agak2 arr~~~

cry

should i give any definition regarding this word "Cry"??

i can't...because i would cry either...T.T

its so sad, when someone you love and trust not understand u....

when whatever u said just be ignored...

seems like your feeling is not important at all...

you might feel shame...or should feel shame of your self...

when you are begging for something, and suddenly you be ignored...

and because of it,

some pure water from eyes will fallen till no more tear can came out...

and that is cry...

when your heart is broken into pieces...

when you have no more word to say...

then the tears plays it role...

and that is cry...

even you means nothing to the person you love...

still you need to survive...

because before you fall in love, you once with nobody...

and i believe...

the tears mean a lot to someone who appreciate you...

and lets stop crying...and begin to smile...

p/s: people wont say that my face is full of smile, if i'm not smiling...

idiot

well, idiot means:

"1 stupid person. 2 mentally deficient person incapable of rational conduct.  idiotic adj. idiotically adv. [Greek idiotes, = private citizen, ignorant person] "

anyway, past few days...i feel like kind of idiot...

why??whatever i done seems like "kurennngg sokmo"...

my report = not done

my problem= not settle

my job= crap!!!

maybe i think to much about things that i not suppose to think...

some changes happen to me and my usrati...

feels a bit different and sad...ohhww my~~

i planned, and He planned...the best Planner win...

and i know it is the best for me, for them and for all....insyaAllah...

my frenz send me some picture from japan...

its beautiful in japan...isn't it??but my heart right now not that beautiful...uwaaa

don't know why, but i feel like not happy in past few days...

down...so not in the mood....

my best frenz ask me to chillex...

but the feeling inside not as simple as word....

maybe i should stop all the things before it is too late...

for sure, i choked my own word when someone said this to me

"the bad things that happen to us, might come from the bad things that we hide from others"

and i know...as Allah swt knows everything about me...

and i can't hide anything...

about things inside me~~

about things that i care so much before...and now...

that things seems so bad...

feels like i'm a bad person...

so that i decided to change....

need to rest in peace!!

choww~~

p/s: i know silent really kill me inside...hate it and want to forget about it...3 days in row sleep at 3.00 am...save me from this stupidity!!!!

panic

yup...its panic...not picnic!!!

my intern report...NOT YET DONE...

and guess what??

presentation could be today...hope not~~plezzz prof...

not really panic but a bit la...

theres 2 things that i totally panic now...

1. batuk kering...

serious, this cough seems different from any others cough i ever had...

so much worried...but not yet go to "pusat kesihatan UPM"...no time..

what can i do...well,well, well....

syabas kepada SYABAS kerana selamatkan kami sekejap dgn air...waahhhh da lame xde memories mcm nie...kih kih kih

2. water gone....arghhh

much panic???serumpun collages out of water...

smpai amik wuduk pakai air mineral tu...

somebody say...someone stole our main pipe...

ape ke hal nye la makhluk tu...xtau ke betape buruk nye kesan pd org lain...

"klu die kesah, die xcurik"...yeah right!!..

3. new student arrived...

yeah...last but not least...new student arrived...

guess..a lot of work to be done...and i expected someone to be arrived soon...

pray for the best for all of you...

me?? still stress with my intern report and a lot of assignment that need to be done...

actually i taken may be 27 kredit this sem...is that alrite???

final year project lagi...argghhh!!! chillex team...haha

alrite...at least i'm not going to do some recruitment tomorrow...hehe

alritez yoo...chow!!

p/s: somebody going to japan this week...and me?? all alone~~

decided!!

well...well...

tonite...packaging stuff and get off...haha

by tomorrow morning i need to admit one things...

I NEED TO START STUDY....AGAIN...

fuh..thankz Allah coz just one year left...

Alhamdulillah...

well, decide go to Manchester next year...so

guess need to pay some ptptn or else...BLACKLISTED!!!

sgt melampau...aq study lagi kot...siap tak bg tangguh...

uwaaa...ngadu kat mak...haha

however happen today...i guess i feel release..

why??

well, i decided something this morning...

something about my future...what is that??

wait until the day comes...hihi...secret for a moment...

sometimes, we think we can live better without anybody...

but in some moment...we actually can't....

people use to said...

"u only realize that u love something when the things is already gone..."

well, i don't want to be that kind of person...so, i decided to wait...

coz actually i'm already feel scared since last 7 dayz...

thought i already lost something in my life...something important and something that i love..

but actually, i don't...yet...hehe

so, i better take care of it while i still have it...didn't i??yeahhh...

one a.m in the morning...not finish packing my stuff...no one helps...

everybody sleeping and happy...

me...keep smiling~~

hoping and praying next 2 sem will be the best moment in life..insya-Allah...

alritezz yoo...CHOW!!

p/s: well, i guess i have new best frenz today and promise to love this one more..hehe..fair??yeah..i know...not fair... =)

today

TODAY i miss someone, hate someone, love someone, sad, happy, nervous,sick....
how about you??

haha...
getting start again using english or maenglish because i need to start some engine in my mind...haha
next week, back to school again!!!

after 4 month holiday...not really since i went to practical trainee...
but one week raya plus one week full real holiday makes me a bit.......

"arghhh...studyyyy!!!!"...haha..(student...u know...)

a bit nervous anyway...

not yet done my report...not even start it..haha
what a shame of me...get reallll plezzz...

next week nak hantar...oh my~~

somehow, my best frenz must be soo much nervous today...(somehow, i feel nervous for him)

his 1st day on plantation...hope everything will be just fine there...

ok frenz...nothing can stop u...

if u read this...chill out!!

i always support u from behind...so, chillex n smile!!

by the time we feel happy with our situation, other might feel different...

load of work, burden u so much...but less makes u down...

hope my lovely girl will fight the situation just fine...right shida??hehe

uhibbuki fillah ukhti...

let gather and talks someday...miss u!!ooohh

for myself...

2nd day fasting (pose 6)..makes myself busy,and sleep more...haha
need to forget all the things happen in this 4 month...kind impossible to success...

but, i need to...promise already...

yeahh...gambate!!!

alritez...nk p masak2 buke pose!!haha
chow yoo..

yosh!!

hurt

hurt means (past and past part. hurt) 1 (also absol.) cause pain or injury to. 2 cause mental pain or distress to. 3 suffer pain (my arm hurts). —n. 1 injury. 2 harm, wrong.

don't you know it actually can makes people cry badly??

so, don't hurt anyone...please!!!

my opinion, if u mad or angry with someone, u need to say clearly..whatz wrong and so on...

or else, misunderstand will take place...

silent killing, man...it's true~~

well, what the world i'm be talking about this issue??

it's just something i thought, some of these busy day...

i need to revise about something...

don't know la...something happen, and i'm surely don't know what...

but, things change...i just can predict the reason, but yeah....not power enough to make it sure...

a bit tired today..but hey!! its friday...

meaning that, tomorrow is holiday....

rest up my mind...my heart that hurt...yeah~~nobody care...

chow!!!

p/s: feeling like...i don't want today end like this bad...can postpone time a bit eehh??

letz stay up tonight and thinking what should things be....

what?

today, my colleague got his arm dislocated while playing basketball...so that a lot a lot of work still pending at the office...got so many interview need to be arrange...got myself confius and think beyond the thinking...

someone said to me "makin hari, makin kurang percaya aq kat ko"

erm~~what that suppose to mean??

got myself speechless for a moment....

somehow, i know... to believe someone is not that easy...

and i don't blame anybody...just put the blame on me...wah~~like a song i guess...

actually, i ask one question and i got one answer...

it is so hard when the answer u get, is not the answer u want...

might hurt u...but need to remember,

sometimes, u get what u don't want but it is actually the best for u, and sometimes, u get what u want but it is actually worse for u...Allah knows what u dont know...

so, i will doing my best and let the fate decide...

clear myself about something today...

p/s: i miss the moment i was at bintulu..

arghhh

alrite, tgk title pun da tau aq stress tahap gaban...

masalah lepas satu, satu, dan satu lagi...dan lagi...dan lagi....

tak sanggup rasenye untuk teruskan praktikal...

belum 30 hari lagi, tp bebanan sgt2 men'down'kan aq...

serius...

setiap hari, ade je masalah...

and makin teruk dan terus teruk...

teringat satu lagu..

~~ujian adalah..tarbiyah dr Allah....~~

yup, tau...cume aq xsanggup untuk tunggu masalah terus terusan menjadi makin teruk dan teruk...

terase lmbat sgt 30 hari berlalu...

ketenangan y Allah tarik selama 30 hari ni buat aq semakin rs down...

setiap hari penuh dgn debaran n masalah...

ooo...sgt negatif rasenye jiwa aq sekarang..

bak kate nabil JK...jiwa kacau beb~~

besok ingat nk mintak cuti...

aq nk settle kan problem2 y menarik jiwa aq dr ketenangan...

so that aq xnk tanggung bende y semakin teruk...

ok la..chow!!!

p/s: i waiting a call that seems like not going to happen...so, i need to rest up my mind...fuh~~

zzzzzz......

gegar

fuh~~
sekarang nie susah la nk stay up...

pukul 11 p.m je mule la....haha

so, klu selalu update pkul 2-3 pagi, untuk 2-3 bulan nie xdpt la...

serius xlarat...

keje belambak...xcaye, tnye rakan sekerja saye...sape??

haha...carik sendiri....

buat mase nie...ade 7 keje y diberi...hope xtambah lagi...

skang nie...meje aq penuh dgn dokumen2, fail2...

tu xciter dlm laci...resume belambak...tp aq da bace la semua...dont worry~~

ade rezeki, dpt la...doa2 la....

satu bende la aq blaja sejak duk HR nie...

syarikat besar, serius susah nk amik dak2 fresh graduate..

klu diorg nk amik pun, pointer kne 3.5 ke atas..serius~~

tp jgn smpai 3.9...tu pun diorg reject...

sebab pe??sebab takut...dak2 pandai nie, klu dpt tawaran lagi bagus, confirm2 die lari...haha

well, tips nie kite2 aje...haha

ok, berbalik pada cerite gegar...

aq adalah diantara y merase gegaran nye...

pening smpai bawak ke malam...haha, power x power kuase Allah swt, lu pikir la sendiri...

5.5 skala dr indon membawa ke malaysia...ternyata kite serumpun...

haha...apakah motif nye??wah~~kite mmg sedare seislam pun kan....

so, peace bro~~

ok la...xde pe pun nk cakap...

hari nie penat otak..petang td pun, aq tinggal je manager tu interview...

da tu, sape suruh wat interview lepas 5.30 ptg, sape nk tunggu...haha

p/s: jiwa kacau la hari nie..byk bende aq pikir...pasal persahabatan...wujud ke persahabatan di zaman kacau bilau nie??argghhh~~aq serius malas nk layan otak mereng aq mlm2 nie...

emosi

sejak 2 menjak aq praktikal nie,

byk betul aq main emosi...

train lambat....emosi

train cepat tp sardin...emosi

minyak hitam krete probz...emosi

tank minyak petrol asik tunjuk jarum full je walaupun da 3 hari....emosi (haha)

keje banyak....emosi

xde keje...emosi

and y paling tak tahan petang td

kne perli kat tempat praktikal....serius emosi~~

siap kutuk uni aq kot...

hellloooo~~universiti ranking ke-4 kot...

aq pun bagus ape...

keje patut 8:30 am- 5:30 pm...

tp aq dtg pukul 8:15 am- 6:00pm kot...

and elaun aq xde la beribu jugak pun....

nasib la y lain mmg 1st class...tinggal sorang tu je...

so IN-THE-BOX~~huh!!

kluar la skit dr kotak pemikiran kolot tu...

ade lagi org mcm tu kat dunia nie...issshhh~~~

dgn emosi y kurang stabil tu,

balik2 bilik je....

dpt pulak cerite2 y meng"geli"kan hati~~

ok...double attack kot...

skit2 da la~~xselera aq makan..terpakse tapau...mencikkk!!!

kadang2 perkataan kite bley mnyakitkan hati org lain...

dan

"tidak beriman seseorang itu, sehingga dia mencintai saudaranya seperti dia mnyintai dirinya sndiri"- Hadith 13 (hadith arbain)

so, bro~~lu pikir la sendiri~~

cube bygkan situasi nie...

"lu dtg rumah org, pastu lu curi semua harta org tu n bunuh semua ahli keluarga org tu,

last2 le, lu mintak maaf..."

agak2 ape perasaan org tu...

mgkin la die kate maafkan n xkesah (baik tu..hehe)...tp serius, makan dalam kot...

teringat kate2 ustaz rahmat dlm sang murabbi:

klu kite da paku sesuatu dinding, n bile kite tanggal balik paku tu....mmg paku da xde...

tp kesan stay kot....

mcm tu la jugak kate2 yang xberhikmah...

sedih aq....

n xde sape nk pujuk...xpe2...pujuk diri sendiri la~~haha

ok~~cukup la kenangan itu buat aq tersenyum...cewah~~

ok...chow!!!!

p/s: keje bertimbun td aq tinggalkan...so, aq nk tido dulu...then emosi aq da ok...buat keje pun mesti senyum punye...

tp bile pikir kwn sekerje sebelah meje aq....arggghhh...2 bulan lebih lagi tu...