an old memory

 From Mother's Day, 2017:

My children in a nutshell: Jonah made me 3 different Mother's Day cards. Caroline gave me a hug and a kiss. Miriam ate the Mother's Day treat she made for me at church.

 

10 years

At some point in the afternoon, Josh called and suggested Jonah and I come to campus. Thanks to the heads up from Noel, I had grabbed our bag of snacks and toys and was mentally prepared to leave the house (my fellow introverts will know this is serious business). I must not have been completely convinced we were going to need to hunker down, though, because I was waiting for bread to come out of the oven when Josh called. I just turned off the oven and walked away, figuring maybe it would finish cooking as the oven cooled.

We drove to campus like we had two weeks before, but this time, three things were noticeably different:

1. It wasn't raining. Something about showing up earlier in pouring rain helped it feel stormy. On the 27th, it felt more or less like a normal spring day.

2. I parked in the staff parking lot this time.

3. The basement was full of people. Last time, there had been a few students and staff members riding out the storm warning with us. This time, it was a crowd. Jonah was not even the only child there, which certainly made things feel a little more serious.

While the storm headed towards Tuscaloosa, we watched James Spann's weather report on the projector. Jonah watched Finding Nemo. The power (and therefore, wifi) cut out right as James Spann said something about "approaching the mall" or something similar. Since we lived more or less across the street from the mall, we had a pretty good idea that there would be some damage in our neighborhood, but that's all we knew. The power/internet never did come back on, so we all just...waited. Remember that this was a whole line of storms, so even after "our' tornado passed over town, we weren't sure it would be entirely safe to leave just yet.

At some point sometime later, Josh left. Thinking back now, I'm sure he or someone else was checking updates on their phones or had found a radio broadcast somehow, but I was busy taking care of Jonah. I remember people slowly leaving and not coming back, so it seemed like our time in the underground bunker was over, but Josh wanted to go check things out first. I remember being a little frustrated (worried?) that he was gone for a long time. I didn't know where we were supposed to go to find him, so we just waited. Turns out, he was gone for such a long time because he was busy returning calls (or trying to) because when he emerged from the basement, his phone blew up with messages. When he called our home teacher to check in, Dan didn't answer (He was going through his own tornado emergency at the time), so Josh called the bishop. Sis. Wyatt answered and told Josh the the bishop was actually out looking for us. If that's not love, I don't know what is.

When Josh came back downstairs, we loaded up and started driving home. We made it as far as the parking lot across the street from the hospital* before a police officer stopped us and told us no vehicular traffic was allowed past that point. We were maybe a half mile from our house, so we parked and started on foot. Josh carried Jonah and off we went down the hill. As we got close to the house, we started to jog. I don't know why exactly, other than we just couldn't walk anymore.

It took us a few minutes to figure out exactly which house was ours. It's somewhat surprising how difficult it is to tell when one neighbor's house is nothing but a foundation and our house was missing parts. Without a porch and a back room, it didn't look like the same house. As we stood on the corner and counted houses to figure out which house belonged to us, Aly and Aaron (friends from the dinner party a few weeks before) were standing on our lawn.

If I remember correctly, they were on their way to return a laptop to a friend without realizing just how severe the damage was. It became readily apparent that they would not be making it to return the laptop when they were also stopped by police. Parked at a shopping center across the street, trying to figure out whether to go back home, they ran into Bishop Wyatt. They told him they knew where our house** was, so they came to find us while he went on looking for more of his lost sheep.

A police officer was going through the neighborhood telling people there was a possible gas leak and we needed to leave, so we took one quick run through the house, grabbed our 72-hour kit (which yes, we should have taken with us originally), and headed home with Aaron and Aly. Well, Jonah and I went home with Aly while Josh and Aaron went looking for ways to help.

Next time, I'll write about what Jonah and I did that night as well as what Josh did (as best as I remember it). But for now in the story, we've been scooped up off our lawn and taken to the Richards residence for the night (and what would become many months).

*There are so many incredible stories about what happened that day, including the miracle that the tornado didn't hit the hospital.

**Not only had they been to our home before, but Ally also remembered our conversation about where the best place would be to ride out a storm.

10 years, the morning of

From here on out, a disclaimer is in order:

The more I learn about how memory works, the more I realize some of my memories of that day and the aftermath might not be as accurate as I think. Nonetheless, this is how I remember it. Some of these memories and stories will also touch on other people's experiences. I'm almost certainly leaving things out of misremembering, but no part of this story happened in a vacuum, so these friends get to be part of my story, too. I hope I'm doing them justice.

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Jonah and I spent the morning of April 27, 2011 at my friend Noel's house. The Holleys were a really important part of my life at the time. Looking back, I think she might have been my first mom friend! She had 3 children at the time, and her youngest was Jonah's age. That made her an expert in all things parenting as far as I was concerned (and honestly, she was). She'd also been in Tuscaloosa for a while, had a husband doing a PhD at the university, and was open and outgoing enough that I could ask her anything. I'm pretty sure I got my doctor, grocery store, and favorite park because of her recommendations. She picked me up and took me along to book clubs, church meetings, and park dates. I met so many more people because of her. Jonah also learned to eat apples with the peel on (hallelujah!) at her house.

So even though I was mostly unaware of the weather risk heading our way (this particular line of storms was not a surprise, after all), Noel was not. She'd been through plenty of tornado watches and had the drill down pat. If I remember correctly, her family's plan involved eating marshmallows in the bathtub. There may have been a mattress in there as well? Either way, we spent some part of the morning discussing weather. We also spent part of the morning talking about pregnancy. Noel is the first person (other than Josh) that knew I was pregnant with Caroline...sort of. I wasn't even sure yet. I hadn't had a positive pregnancy test yet and things were still a little wonky after an earlier miscarriage, but I remember telling her reasons I suspected I might be expecting. We didn't know Caroline was cooking in there yet (or that she would be named Caroline), but the possibility was certainly on my mind. Noel was also expecting at the time, which will be an important detail later.

Although we didn't spend a lot of time discussing the weather, Noel did have the news on and was keeping an eye on the storm. Around 11:00, Noel sent Jonah and I home with instructions to get home and get our stuff figured out before any bad weather rolled in. According to the blog, Jonah had pizza for lunch, but he refused to eat any toppings (including cheese or sauce). When I told him this last night, he was appalled. "All I ate was the *bread*?" What can I say? Two-year-old Jonah had some opinions about food.

 

10 years, the day before

It will undoubtedly take me a few days to write up the entire account of what happened 10 years ago tomorrow, not to mention the time I will take to describe the days and weeks after. That said, I'm waiting until tomorrow because I know I will be thinking about it all day anyway.

What was happening 10 years ago today? For me, not much. The day before (April 25), Jonah declared ice cream, "more perfecter than cake and dinner." The next morning (April 27), he would refuse to eat any part of his pizza except the crust and then turn down a banana until the "crusts" (the strings) were removed. I didn't write on the blog on the 26th, so it must have been a normal day of entertaining a toddler and trying to figure out what to cook.

For the more weather-aware parts of the South, the 26th was a day of nervous waiting. I have experienced many days like that since, but on April 26, 2011, I was still pretty unaware of weather patterns and risks. If I had been paying attention, I might have seen something like this:

10 years, the lead up

10 years ago yesterday, there was a tornado outbreak in Alabama that included 29 tornadoes throughout the state and one EF-3 tornado in Tuscaloosa county (though pretty far away from our house). For us, the tornado on the 15th was a practice run and ultimately made "our tornado" a much safer experience.

On the 15th, when the risk of severe weather crept towards campus and our neighborhood, Josh asked me to bring Jonah to campus so we could shelter in the basement of his building. I packed a bag of movies, snacks, and toys and off we went. Josh and I ended up arguing later about the fact that I drove to the parking garage and (sort of) paid for parking instead of just parking outside the building in the faculty/staff lot. In fact, the garage meter would not take one of my bills and a kind student in line behind me ended up paying the rest for me (probably so he could get out of the rain as much as anything else).

It was pouring rain when Jonah and I ran across campus from the parking garage to Josh's building. Other than the rain, the day was uneventful. We spent an hour or two in the basement eating fruit snacks and watching movies (probably Cars, since that was Jonah's favorite at the time) on my laptop.

When we got home from riding out the storm warning, our yard was completely flooded. We let Jonah and Dixie splash and swim in the water while I checked on my newly-planted vegetable garden, which had mostly washed away.

There were some trees down, but not in our neighborhood, and no other real effects for us. Two weeks later, however, I already had a bag packed* (all it needed was some fresh snacks), we brought Dixie inside instead of leaving her in the yard**, and I didn't even bother to go to the parking garage.  Although my preference will always be to pay for parking***, we'd already made a plan as a family thanks to our test run on the 15th.

Our experience that day also led to a conversation that would later prove to be very important. We were hanging out with a group of friends we'd made through church who were newly married couples about our age. With the exception of one couple, every other couple had at least one student at the University of Alabama. In most cases, that is what had brought us to Tuscaloosa to begin with, although a few were from Alabama or surrounding states. We had representatives from Oregon, Utah, Arizona, Nevada, and Florida as well (if I'm remembering everyone's hometown correctly). We were discussing the tornado on the 15th and what we knew/didn't know about how to appropriately shelter during a tornado (remember, most of us had not grown up in tornado-prone areas). Josh and I were debating back and forth where the best place in our house would be if we could not get to campus. I was arguing the hallway would be best (I'd heard internal rooms were preferred, and we had no internal rooms other than one hallway in the middle of the house). Josh was suggesting the bathroom would be best (bathtubs/showers are also good choices since they are usually smaller rooms with more structural support). In the end, we never did ride out a tornado at home, but the discussion ended up having some importance later.

*There were other things I should have done or would do differently in a similar situation now, but that doesn't take away from the fact that my bag was already packed on the 27th because of the tornado warning on the 15th.

**The poor pup. I should have taken her to campus with us, though I'm not sure how that would have worked out. In her kennel would probably have been better on the 15th because of the rain, but being locked inside during a direct hit was undoubtedly worse on the 27th. My point is not that it was better for her to be inside so much as that we made a conscious decision based on previous experience and tried to make a better choice. Poor little dog.

***Blame it on a combination of my fear of conflict, my intense desire to follow the rules, and the time I worked at the ASU parking office. I am very aware of parking rules and fees. It makes me a true joy on vacations, I'm sure.

words that start with 8

 (From 2012):

Jonah: Let's do all the words that start with x

 

me: Hm, there's not many. Xylophone, xenophilia, x-ray. That's all I know.

 

Jonah: Ok, now do 8!

 

me: Eight is a number. Pick a letter.

 

Jonah (close to tears): No, words that start with 8!

 

It it much too early for this sort of passion. Does "let's go back to bed" start with 8?

another memory, starring baby Caroline and helpful Jonah

Jonah: Mom, Dixie was licking Caroline's pacifier.
Me: Stick it in the sink so I can wash it.
Jonah: Oh, it's okay. I wiped it off with my underwear.