How to train one’s will to have but one ultimate aim in all things, both external and internal— to please God

Saint Nikodemos the Hagiorite

An excerpt from "Unseen Warfare"by Saint Nicodemus of the Holy Mountain, and Saint Theophan the Recluse

In addition to training your mind to learn, you should also control your will, so as not to let it lean towards your own desires, but instead to lead it to be perfectly as one with the will of God. Moreover keep it firmly planted in your mind, that it is not enough for you merely to desire and seek to please God. 

Always and in everything; you must desire it as if moved by God Himself, and for one single aim—to please Him with a pure heart. 

To be firmly grounded in this aim, we have to endure a much greater struggle with our nature than in anything we have mentioned above. For our nature is so accustomed to please itself, that it seeks its own comfort and pleasure in all its doings, even the most righteous and spiritual, and secretly and lustfully feeds on it as though it were food.

And so it happens that when we see the chance of spiritual doing lying before us, we immediately desire it and impetuously rush towards it;yet not as men moved by the will of God, nor for the sole purpose of pleasing Him, but for the sake of the comfort and joy which is born in us, when we desire and seek that which God wants from us. This prelest is the better concealed and hidden, the higher and more spiritual is the nature of what we desire. This is why I say that we should not be satisfied with desiring what God wills, but must desire it how He wishes it, when He wishes it and for the reason and purpose He wishes it.

The Apostle also teaches us to prove what is the will of God, that it is not only good, but also acceptable to Him and perfect in all respects. He says: ‘Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God’ (Rom. xii. 2). For if our action is faulty, even in one respect, or if we do something not with our whole will and strength, it is clear that it is, and is called, imperfect. This should lead you to the conclusion that even when we desire God Himself and seek Him, even this desire and search can contain some fault or omission, and may be mixed with some pandering to our self-love or vainglory; since we may have in view more our own good than the will of God, and do something rather for our own sake than for the sake of God. Yet He considers only those actions acceptable, which are done solely for His glory and wishes us to love Him alone, desire Him alone and work for Him alone.

Thus, my brother, if you wish to safeguard yourself from such hidden obstacles on the path to perfection, if you wish to be firmly grounded in such an attitude as to desire and do all things only because God wishes it, desirous only to please and glorify Him and to work for Him alone, since He wishes to be the beginning and the end in every action and every thought of ours— act in the following manner.

Saint Silouan The Athonite- On the Will of God and Freedom

It is a great good to give oneself up to the will of God.  Then the Lord alone is in the soul.  No other thought can enter in, and the soul feels God's love, even though the body be suffering.

When the soul is entirely given over to the will of God, the Lord Himself takes her in hand and the soul learns directly from God.   Whereas, before, she turned to teachers and to the Scriptures for instruction. But it rarely happens that the soul's teacher is the Lord Himself through the grace of the Holy Spirit, and few there are that know of this, save only those who live according to God's will.

The proud man does not want to live according to God's will: he likes to be his own master and does not see that man has not wisdom enough to guide himself without God.  And I, when I lived in the world, knew not the Lord and His Holy Spirit, nor how the Lord loves us-I relied on my own understanding; but when by the Holy Spirit I came to know our Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, my soul submitted to God, and now I accept every affliction that befalls me, and say: "The Lord looks down on me. What is there to fear?" But before, I could not live in this manner.

Life is much easier for the man who is given over to the will of God, since in illness, in poverty, in persecution he reflects thus: "Such is God's pleasure, and I must endure on account of my sins."

Thus for many years have I suffered violent headaches, which are hard to bear but salutary because the soul is humbled through sickness.  My soul longs to pray and keep vigil, but sickness hinders me because of my body's demand for rest and quiet; and I besought the Lord to heal me, and the Lord hearkened not unto me.  So, therefore, it would not have been salutary for me to have been cured.

“When our dear Lord refuses to grand us something we persistently request of Him….”. One of Father(Saint) Porphyrios teachings

 Saint Porphyrios

Our Dear Lord Jesus will satisfy the requests of the members of His holy church, when He deems that the outcome will only be for our own good. Therefore we should not be demanding, and similarly, we should not be impatient. We should ask politely and with perfect abandon. We will receive if, and when, HE knows, this is to our own true and eternal advantage.

“When the Lord does not give us something we persistently request of Him, then one of two things may be happening. He does not wish to give us something which is not for our own good, or we are unable to see when, and especially how, we should be asking. And these are not mutually exclusive; that is, both may be happening.

Regarding the first case, no one may discover the Lord’s wishes. And this is because no one is able to know the Mind of God. That is why I shall refrain from making a comment.

Regarding the second case, however, I could say a lot. First and foremost, when we are asking something from God we should refrain from digging our heels in and retort… “I must absolutely have this right now..”. Because this response is not just absurd; but also constitutes a great disrespect towards our Maker. Who are you, or, if you prefer, who am I, that I can demand things of the Lord? And not only that, but I am also prepared to tell Him exactly when He is supposed to satisfy these demands.

-But.., dear grandpa.., I have not demanded anything, and I haven’t set any time limits either. This you are already aware of, very well. And I am only asking because my problem has now become age-old…