Via Kinky Delight, we have two lesbians lounging and snacking in this vintage erotic artwork by T. Mertens, about whom very little is known:

Honest Erotica dates the artwork to 1937.

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This one-minute clip of Seth Rogan’s character ranting at his movie wife about their sexless marriage is from the new film The Invite, which Wikipedia suggests may have an overall warmer and funnier nature than you would infer from just watching this:

ErosBlog has been posting dispatches from the conversation about marital sex gone wrong (or missing) since the earliest days of the blog. Quotation should not be mistaken for endorsement or agreement, you know the drill, yada yada.

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ErosBlog has several posts in the deep archives exploring the unsettling objectification and dehumanization of women by treating them (for satirical, advertising, or humor purposes) as taxidermy trophies to be mounted for display and/or sale. Nor is it “all misogyny, all the time”; there’s even a gender-flipped version of the trope from the world of comic books for teen girls. Which brings us to the magazine comic version of the trope:

Who knew that rich old bastards could arrange for camara safaris at nudist camps?

The comic is signed “Morrie”, likely by Morrie Turner, and appeared in the November 1957 issue of Courage magazine.

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When showerbeerr tells men “you can absolutely get your girl to do a threesome with you if you just get a little bit more gay” it doesn’t come as a surprise to me at all. I see the TikTok/BookTok ladies talking about this all the time. When they read menage fiction, they want MMF, not MFM — and yes, the letter placement matters. They want “the boyfriends to be boyfriending” or there’ll be no joy in Mudville whatsoever.

I don’t think it’s a coincidence she critiques male erotic “literacy” specifically here:

You can absolutely get your girl to do a threesome with you. You just have to get a little bit more gay. That is the solution.

Because anytime I have a conversation with a man about this, I’m not loving the pitch. To be honest, I’m not impressed. They’re always like, would you be open to something like that? And I’m like, yes, let’s hear it, let’s hear the pitch.

And they get all excited, they’re like, okay, cool. So it has to be with another girl. That’s the only option. And I’m like, ah, like, it’s a little rigid. It’s a little rigid. Don’t you care about what my fantasy is? Cause it’s not necessarily that. I’m open to some other stuff.

And they. They’re like, what do you mean?

And I’m like, well, what about another guy? Two guys? And they look at me like I just asked them to punch their mom in the throat or something. Like I just said something so fucking crazy. And the truth is, like, I’m on some Challengers shit, and they’re on some fluorescently lit video on the homepage of a website they only visit in the incognito browser.

Shit, you know, like if men think that they are so adventurous, that they’re so erotically intelligent, really you’re just trying to recreate something that you’ve seen on the most depraved, exploitative alleyways of the internet. That’s not adventurous. Like, you are fucking vanilla. It’s literally vanilla.

And then, you know, we start talking about it more, and they’re like, okay, fine, fine, fine. We can do two guys. Fine. But I’m not kissing him, I’m not touching him, and I’m not kissing him.

What the fuck do you think this is? What do you think this is? Why would I want that? Why would I want a situation where you guys are not interacting? Seriously? Um, if you are vanilla, that’s totally fine. And most straight guys are. Just admit it. The only literacy you have in the subject is something you’ve seen in a really dark, exploitative fantasy that I don’t wanna recreate. I don’t wanna recreate videos that you’ve seen on the internet.

Right. It’s about being open. It’s about, like, letting the dynamic unfold. It’s about seeing what’s gonna happen and, like, rolling with the punches. And most straight guys just can’t do that. And that’s totally fine, but stay in your lane. Please don’t bring this to my desk ever again.

Probably I should take this moment to remind people that I quote things all the time here on ErosBlog without agreeing with every jot and tittle. Specifically in this case I don’t agree that common porn scenarios are exploitive in general or that (as this commentator implies) the uber-common man-with-two-women threesome-sandwich fantasy is exploitive in specific. But I do agree that it’s somewhat vanilla and boring, especially from a woman’s perspective. I’m not trying to police women’s fantasies when I say this, but I’d guess that at least eight out of ten times it’s fanservice for a man’s fantasy, not a woman’s. If you want to engage her erotic imagination, propose the sort of threesome she’s going to find erotic, duh…

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This lineup of naughty porn-star perps ready for their strip search (or their spankings, not sure which) is cropped from a larger photo that appeared in a 2011 shoot/gallery that was marketed (at sites that no longer exist) under the titles Magnificent Seven and/or Group Strip Perfection:

As the titles suggest, the full photo has seven panties-down models in it. The cheeky ladies are identfied as Dakota, Ivana Fukalot, Mia Mayblack, Mika A, Romea, Sasha Blonde, and Stasha.

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Recently I saw a bitter complaint from an enlightened gentleman who correctly pointed out that trollish internet misogynists had deprived an entire generation of men. How? By inventing the derisive term “tramp stamp” for the sexy tattoos that women place in the small of their backs or right at the top of their butt cheeks. Such a sex-negative sobriquet has surely reduced the number of these tattoos on display whenever the weather is warm, or (even better) when it’s face-down-ass-up sexy-time in a bedroom near you.

I am ashamed to realize I accepted that judgmental nomenclature for many years without a second thought. But at least I didn’t contribute significantly to tramp-shaming; I can only find two ErosBlog posts with “tramp stamp” in them. Better yet, one of them features Donald Trump’s poorly-rendered ugly mug, and the other one put “tramp stamp” in scare quotes while addressing some issues the ancient Greeks may or may not have had with these tattoos.

Be all that as it may, I’m now delighted to learn that there’s a new, much more sex-positive nomenclature in town. These tattoos are tramp stamps no longer; the fun kids are calling them “cake toppers” now! And I, for one, welcome our new pastry-decorated overladies:

Self-described sassy redhead Juniper Anne says

Since tramp stamps are now being referred to as cake toppers, I’m thinking about getting one that says:

All you can eat carrot cake
Baked fresh daily
Homemade
For professional eaters only

But it’s a little long, and a little too forward. What do you think? Should I do it?

I’ll do it. Don’t tell me to do it. Okay, bye-bye.

Do it!

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We don’t have enough context to know precisely why our hungry heroine is on her knees in a tiled shower stall with four burly men, draining their balls and getting all sticky. Perhaps she has a praise kink, and their warm regard is all the incentive she needs. Maybe she’s got a thirst for cum. Maybe she’s a groupie, and they control doors she wants to pass through. Everybody wants something in this life:

The fun thing about art is that a lot of the time, we get to write our own story. We might not be “right”, but we can’t be wrong, either!

This illustration is by Adler.

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