Messing up lovely ladies is my favourite thing, be it a girlfriend or a paid model. No expense spared with big real cream pies, gallons of black treacle, lashings of custard, kilos of flour and substances like paint, oil and pva glue - all poured, splatted and smeared onto lovely bodies, clothing and shampooed into gorgeous hair with reckless abandon.

I'm in my 50s and have been around much longer than my profile suggests so my influences are very much the typical ones growing up as Gen X like Tiswas, silent slapstick movies and variety shows. As an adult I discovered Splosh!, MessyFun MessyGirl and later PiefightGirls.