Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

A&E

Rate this book
A night with the ex.
A walk of shame.
And an unforgettable second-chance romance.

Running into one another was a case of wrong time, wrong place. I never expected him to follow me home. And I just made the biggest mistake of my life.

I let him in.

Alex Torino. Call him Tori for short.
Charming. Gorgeous. Famous.
Football player.

And my high school sweetheart.

The perfect dream guy.
For someone else.
Because my name fits.
I'm Bleu.

So why did I let him in?
And why is he in my bed?
And why am I thinking about letting him have exactly what he wants?

Because he needs me to stay just one more day.

248 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 9, 2018

39 people are currently reading
351 people want to read

About the author

Kailee Reese Samuels

48 books627 followers
Just a girl who loves pushing boundaries in original, addictive noir/dark fiction with genre-busting elements from dark romance, romantic suspense, psychological thriller, mafia, MC, and realism. Intense, thought-provoking, edge-of-your-seat, gripping page-turners that stick with you long after the last sentence. TAT Books are the perfect escape with a delicious beverage, a box of chocolate, and plenty of tissues.

Dear Readers (Raniero Fangirls) have come to expect my emotionally crippling writing style.

Storyteller embracing diversity. Coffee addict. Mango lover. Blueberry fetishist. Sweet peach tea crazy. Red wine devout. Whiskey deviant. Tattooed & pierced. Bare feet. Sand. Sun. Collects rosaries. Fanatical organizer/cleaner/list-maker. Never sleeps. Hermit and recluse. Social media avoider. Sexy trucks, bad mofo alphas, hot ink, loud music, long nails, and good football. Brisket is a birthright, y’all. Being in the water is a good thing—mermaid in a former life.

I worship everyone who reads one of my books, whether they enjoy it or not, and firmly believe they should all wear a crown.

🥀 FOLLOW KAILEE:
FB Page → http://bit.ly/DirtyPoetry
Instagram → http://bit.ly/InstaKRS

🥀 VISIT my website, blog, and store for signed books → https://kaileereesesamuels.com

🖤 Sal’s Reading List → http://bit.ly/LovetheSal

Peace. Love. & SAL.🖤🥀

Have a beautiful day!

And have FUN reading!

Thank you!

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
86 (76%)
4 stars
11 (9%)
3 stars
11 (9%)
2 stars
2 (1%)
1 star
2 (1%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 78 reviews
Profile Image for Kayla (kaylareads).
145 reviews38 followers
April 8, 2018
Ex high school sweethearts Indigo (bleu) and Alex bump into each other at a party, what follows is an offer she can’t possibly turn down and the story of how they got to that point.

I really enjoyed this mix of ya/na to the point of kinda wishing it was a series rather than a standalone. I wasn’t sure of it until Alex made indigo his deal, then I struggled to put it down. I loved the character development, it was very well done and each person was so unique. My favourite character was definitely Alex, he owned the star football player/womaniser stereotype, but there was a hidden depth to him only brought out by indigo, which made him vulnerable and subsequently,I fell in love.
The story itself was really engaging. I loved that a big aspect of it was of the ya genre, there’s something satisfying about reading about people’s high school dilemmas. The subject of mental illness was sensitively approached but it was also very real and raw.I wouldn’t say it kept me guessing, it was obvious where it would end up, but in a very very good way. To be honest there wasn’t a single thing I disliked about this book. I won’t be nursing a book hangover because of it, but I enjoyed every page of its original plot and real characters.
Profile Image for Philomena Callan Cheekypee.
3,961 reviews422 followers
January 17, 2018
I’ve read all this authors books and this has gotta be my favourite so far (I probably say that after I read each of her books but her books are awesome)

My heart was smashed into little pieces for Indigo. She has been through so much, yet her problems still haunt her.
Alex is the popular guy but he has his own problems. I absolutely loved these two characters.

If your looking for a well written storyline that talks about mental illness then I highly recommend you read this. As this is a standalone it’s the ideal story to introduce you to this authors stories.
I’m so looking forward to reading more from this author. I loved this story.
Profile Image for Kealyn.
509 reviews75 followers
May 1, 2022
A fellow bookstagrammer recommended A&E to me. And I am so glad she did. I absolutely loved and enjoyed this book from start to finish.

A&E is dripped and filled with immense pain. Every character carries a burden they shouldn’t be carrying. Every character is pushed to their limits and beyond. Desperately trying to survive and catch their breath. The book has an incredible arc from the deepest despair hiding in their souls, to seeing a bit of light and holding on. I loved that. It wasn’t pure happiness and perfection in the end. But a realistic view of how you deal with pain, grief, depression, PTSD and loneliness.

This book is the story of Indigo, called Bleu in her youth, and Alex. Two youngsters growing up in broken families. Indigo has lost her parents and is living with her aunt. She grew up in a sort of religious cult. And has been admitted in and out of psychiatric hospitals since the age of 6.

Alex lives with an addicted mother, a stepfather who is in the criminal circuit and is addicted himself to pain killers. He also lost his sister and his older brother moved away.

The story starts with the characters in the present. They meet each other after ten years in a club. Indigo goes home and Alex finds out where she lives and goes to her place. They sleep together and he asks her to come with him to Hawaii. To see if there still is something between them, and see where it will lead. She agrees after some consideration. And that is where the story kick starts. We move ten years into the past and read about how they met and fell in love in the first place.

I don’t want to spoil to much of the story. But this story is laced in pain. Indigo/Bleu is struggling hard with her mental health. She is in an out of psychiatric wards. If she deviates from her path, things get messed up and she loses herself into meaningless sex and hiding herself from the ones she loves.
It broke my heart into pieces seeing her struggle. Seeing her trying to hold on. How disappointed she is in herself and in how she handles things. She doesn’t see her strength at all. How she needs to cut. Needs to see that beautiful colour red flowing down her legs. How she is trying to deal with the present and the past. And how she doesn’t know who she truly is.

Alex is a famous athlete struggling with an ankle injury. All he ever wanted was to take care of his family. And of Indigo. His love who pushed him away. He tried to rearrange his life so she was ready for her and her broken, beautiful and courageous mind.

My heart ached and bled with how they were trying to find each other in the chaos. How co-dependent they are in a way. Finding out what truly happened in Bleu’s past hurt me. And I love how easily Alex shares his love with those who touch his heart.

The ending was beautiful, hopeful and realistic. If you want to read an intimate and true story, then please pick this book up! It is a stunning journey that will hit you right in the gut.

The only thing I do want to mention is this. It might me a small spoiler. So: SPOILER ALERT. In the end Indigo decides to stop taking her medication. And heal. I think the author portrayed mental health realistically in this book. And yes sometimes that might be the right way. But I want to specifically mention that sometimes medication IS the right way. Always, always consult a psychiatrist and never, ever just stop taking your medication. Sometimes having help through medication might give you life instead of taking it. God knows my children have a mother because I am taking my meds. If I wouldn’t I wouldn’t be able to raise them, help them, love them and be there for them. So sometimes it is good for you. And sometimes it is best to not take any. So always have an open dialogue with your psychiatrist and find out what is best for you.

Like I said, I know the author dived deep into this subject and did the story justice. And the mental health world. I just don’t want people to suddenly stop taking their meds in the hope they will heal like Indigo did. So take care of yourself, and what is best for you!

5 very well deserved stars for this beautiful book!
Profile Image for Ana Rita.
1,764 reviews40 followers
March 1, 2018
I can say that after I found my love for book I feel even more complete. I have authors that I like, authors that I love and this lady is in the love pile. She's amazing and her books shows just that. 
Kailee Reese Samuels is the bomb. Her writing is hot and sassy, wild and forbidden, but with so much feeling between every chapter. She knows what to say and when to say. 
a&e is her latest release and tells the stories of Indigo and Alex. 
Indigo " Bleu or Indie" had her childhood marked by tragedy and now she's dealing with demons that haunt her days. 
Alex is the popular guy, he's a quarterback for his team. This could be just another story but he isn't happy. His mom and step-dad are the worst kind of people. 
These two meet and things aren't what they seem. The bond they have is so strong and beautiful.
oh boy... What can I say without spoiling? How can I talk about this book without telling to much? 
This story progressed through the years and we can see that the bond Alex and Indigo share is beautiful and super strong that time can't erase. 
The plot is intense, heartbreaking, real, raw and super addicting. The interation between the characters is beautiful and sweet and managed to stole my heart in the process. 
The issues approached in this book are real and if we pay attention we could make a difference but unfortunately we don't, so this book just came to reinforce that we need to see and help. 
I've laughed, I've cried, I've cursed but I loved and lived every moment of it. 
If you want a book that will blow your mind and focus on real issues this is the one for you. Not everything in life is black or white, sometimes we can have grey as well. 
Kailee you are amazing. It's beautiful the way you approached mental illness. It's amazing how your words can make us think. 
Superb book girl, simply magnificent.
I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book.

Merged review:

I can say that after I found my love for book I feel even more complete. I have authors that I like, authors that I love and this lady is in the love pile. She's amazing and her books shows just that.
Kailee Reese Samuels is the bomb. Her writing is hot and sassy, wild and forbidden, but with so much feeling between every chapter. She knows what to say and when to say.
a&e is her latest release and tells the stories of Indigo and Alex.
Indigo " Bleu or Indie" had her childhood marked by tragedy and now she's dealing with demons that haunt her days.
Alex is the popular guy, he's a quarterback for his team. This could be just another story but he isn't happy. His mom and step-dad are the worst kind of people.
These two meet and things aren't what they seem. The bond they have is so strong and beautiful.
oh boy... What can I say without spoiling? How can I talk about this book without telling to much?
This story progressed through the years and we can see that the bond Alex and Indigo share is beautiful and super strong that time can't erase.
The plot is intense, heartbreaking, real, raw and super addicting. The interation between the characters is beautiful and sweet and managed to stole my heart in the process.
The issues approached in this book are real and if we pay attention we could make a difference but unfortunately we don't, so this book just came to reinforce that we need to see and help.
I've laughed, I've cried, I've cursed but I loved and lived every moment of it.
If you want a book that will blow your mind and focus on real issues this is the one for you. Not everything in life is black or white, sometimes we can have grey as well.
Kailee you are amazing. It's beautiful the way you approached mental illness. It's amazing how your words can make us think.
Superb book girl, simply magnificent.
I voluntarily reviewed an Advance Reader Copy of this book.
Profile Image for Coco.V.
50k reviews105 followers
Want to read
January 1, 2019
🎁 FREE on Amazon today (1/1/2019)! 🎁

Blurb:
Bleu is you.
Misfit girl.
Unpopular girl.
Girl that does bad things when no one is looking--lost girl.

Struggling with an encyclopedia's worth of mental diagnoses-chronic depression, bipolar, and self-harm--will Bleu ever discover who she is and that the future is worth more than the sum of her chart?

He is untouchable.
The charming quarterback.
What would he want to do with a lost girl?

Turns out, Alex Torino wants everything to do with Bleu. From loving and accepting her crazy, can he save Bleu from her demons before it's too late?
Profile Image for Kathleen R..
1,407 reviews43 followers
January 9, 2018




Remember when as adults we keep saying that 'I wish i could go back to high school and teen years'? yes? No? Maybe it's just me then. I can still hear myself preaching on how teens need to embrace these years because it only gets more difficult as adulthood comes around and responsibilities become more and more important. Then i read Kailee Reese Samuel's latest, A&E. I remember.

How lonely you can feel amongst a crowd. How scary growing up felt. How emotions tear you apart when you least expect it. How one single person can make you question just about everything about yourself. God, how do i remember. It's really hard not to when you're reading this book.

Kailee Reese Samuel's way of bringing her stories still feel as poetic as ever, drawing you in when you least expect it, but they feel so real. So truthfully real. I assure you, this book is everything from this author but nothing like she's ever published in the past. It was emotional. Awe inspiring. And gut wrenching in ways no one could ever imagine - least of all myself.





*ARC provided by Author in exchange for an honest review. Reviewed by Kathleen, The Small Girl from A small girl, her man and her books


https://www.goodreads.com/user/show/8063169-kathleen-r



50 Book Reviews  Professional Reader






|

Contact Us Today: smallgirlandherbooks@gmail.com


Profile Image for Genevieve.
Author 16 books11 followers
August 31, 2023
Stay just one day

“𝐼 𝓃𝑒𝑒𝒹 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝒹𝒶𝓇𝓀𝓃𝑒𝓈𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝒶𝓁𝒶𝓃𝒸𝑒 𝒶𝓁𝓁 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝓁𝒾𝓃𝒹𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝓁𝒾𝑔𝒽𝓉.”

I love authors pushing boundaries and bringing to light sensitive topics too many treat as to difficult to effectively represent. I forgot how beautiful this story truly was, as I sat and sobbed. Again.

“𝒲𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓈𝒶𝒾𝓃𝓉𝓈. 𝒲𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓀𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈. 𝒲𝑒 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝒹𝓈.”

Star high school quarterback, Tori, heading to superstardom and college. He came from nothing, scouted, uprooted and provided for. His talent would give him a way out of his small town. Tori is one of the most beautiful characters I’ve read. Just meet him.

“𝐼 𝒶𝓂 𝒻𝓁𝒶𝓌𝑒𝒹. 𝐵𝓇𝑜𝓀𝑒𝓃. 𝑀𝒾𝓈𝑔𝓊𝒾𝒹𝑒𝒹. 𝒪𝓊𝓉𝒸𝒶𝓈𝓉.”

The other side of the coin, Bleu was raised in a commune. An orphan, struggling to find her place, terrified by everything she didn’t know. Her untreated history of mental illness and trauma left her isolated, unable to deal with the world. The only coping mechanisms she’d created, until Tori.

“𝒟𝑜 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝒶𝓁𝓉𝑒𝓇, 𝒹𝑜 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝒸𝒽𝒶𝓃𝑔𝑒, 𝒹𝑜 𝓃𝑜𝓉 𝓇𝑒𝓅𝓇𝑜𝑔𝓇𝒶𝓂. 𝒮𝓉𝒶𝓎 𝒻***** 𝓊𝓅 𝒷𝑒𝒸𝒶𝓊𝓈𝑒 𝒶𝓉 𝓁𝑒𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝐼 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝑜𝓊𝓉𝒸𝑜𝓂𝑒.”

This book was beautifully crafted. Bleu and Tori’s lives are complete opposites. His compassion, and her haunted past, her lack of expectation of anyone or life itself. Beginning as adults, returning to their final school year, spanning ten years—neither were mature enough to cope with issues far greater than anyone could anticipate.

“𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒶𝓇𝑒 𝓌𝑜𝓇𝓉𝒽 𝒾𝓉. 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓃𝓉. 𝒴𝑜𝓊 𝓂𝒶𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓇.”

Gems like this seem to be hidden or overlooked. If you can handle a storyline dealing with the realistic highs and lows of mental illness and attempted suicide, pick this up. It’s easy to connect with both characters as they struggle. Fall in love with Tori as he fights for her and understand and empathise with Bleu.

This book blew the five star rating out of the water for me.
Profile Image for Tai Nelson-Barnes.
2,832 reviews72 followers
January 12, 2018
What can I say about Kailee Samuels that hasn't already been said? Her writing is just beyond anything you can read by most other authors. She brings out such emotions when you read her stories that sometimes it is hard to read her books. You almost have to physic yourself up to read her books. You know you're going to cry, get upset, get horny, laugh, and at the end have your happy ending (you hope with every character).

This story takes on some issues that might be hard for some to read. I thought Kailee did an excellent job of combatting depression and such in this book. I loved this story and would reread it again.
I voluntarily read an advance reader copy for my honest review.
Profile Image for Amy.
1,266 reviews34 followers
January 12, 2018
This is my first book by Kailee Reese Samuels but won't be my last.

I was not emotionally prepared for this book. The story is so raw, so powerful that you feel it to your core. Love is the champion and can help overcome so much. You have to want it. Alex and Indigo have a connection, a bond. They are drawn together. Their friendship continues thru school and into adulthood. Always there for each other when the going get's tough.

Like I said, I cried, I smiled, I supported them and hoped for the best. I was not ready for this book to end. I wanted more.

Profile Image for Mona Livsey.
373 reviews4 followers
January 13, 2018
Life isn’t all pretty lives and perfect parties, it is spattered with indelicacies, hard facts and ugly truths. It is never easy to read much less write about the atrocities that fall on the young and the innocent and how their lives are affected by them. By the ugly truths of the wicked and cruel acts visited on these innocents and how they manage or for a better term “Don’t Manage” to survive, or not.
Author Kailee Reese Samuels has given us another emotional roller coaster ride through the emotionally challenged lives of Indigo Violet Swann aka “Bleu or Indie”, and Alexander “Alex” Torino.
After throwing together some of the oddest put together group of friends: Alex the hometown Football Quarterback whose Mom is a known tramp and his Step-Dad is the town supplier, Olivia Eaves, perky hometown girl whose father is also the law in town, Elliot “El” Vandermeade, fellow student, Band Nerd and Barrista at a local Coffee shop, the most unexpected friendships bloom.
Sparks fly unexpectedly between Bleu/Indie and Alex, but fearing the “crazy” below the skin, Bleu tries to deny and avoid Alex at every turn. But Alex just can’t let go of what he feels for this new girl Indie, so different from everyone he has ever known. Just when Alex and Bleu are finding themselves tradgedy strikes sending Bleu into a full blown catatonic state.
Their worlds are rocked and everything changes, no ever be the same again. In a world where pain, is hidden away, and only comes out to play in the dark. This Author has opened that world and saved a side many never see, much yet notice. The Struggle is real and the Shadows are full the innocent crazies. Who live Day to Day, shadow to shadow, one pain at a time. To you for addressing this situation that occurs around us and to many of us as well. This emotional twister will keep yo glued to these gems as you truffle along with Alex and Bleu, hoping for btter end to such a horrific beginning.

Merged review:

Life isn’t all pretty lives and perfect parties, it is spattered with indelicacies, hard facts and ugly truths. It is never easy to read much less write about the atrocities that fall on the young and the innocent and how their lives are affected by them. By the ugly truths of the wicked and cruel acts visited on these innocents and how they manage or for a better term “Don’t Manage” to survive, or not.
Author Kailee Reese Samuels has given us another emotional roller coaster ride through the emotionally challenged lives of Indigo Violet Swann aka “Bleu or Indie”, and Alexander “Alex” Torino.
After throwing together some of the oddest put together group of friends: Alex the hometown Football Quarterback whose Mom is a known tramp and his Step-Dad is the town supplier, Olivia Eaves, perky hometown girl whose father is also the law in town, Elliot “El” Vandermeade, fellow student, Band Nerd and Barrista at a local Coffee shop, the most unexpected friendships bloom.
Sparks fly unexpectedly between Bleu/Indie and Alex, but fearing the “crazy” below the skin, Bleu tries to deny and avoid Alex at every turn. But Alex just can’t let go of what he feels for this new girl Indie, so different from everyone he has ever known. Just when Alex and Bleu are finding themselves tradgedy strikes sending Bleu into a full blown catatonic state.
Their worlds are rocked and everything changes, no ever be the same again. In a world where pain, is hidden away, and only comes out to play in the dark. This Author has opened that world and saved a side many never see, much yet notice. The Struggle is real and the Shadows are full the innocent crazies. Who live Day to Day, shadow to shadow, one pain at a time. To you for addressing this situation that occurs around us and to many of us as well. This emotional twister will keep yo glued to these gems as you truffle along with Alex and Bleu, hoping for btter end to such a horrific beginning.
Profile Image for Jennifer Pierson.
11.7k reviews186 followers
January 12, 2018
There's no possible way that I could actually come up with any kind of description for this book without giving some kind of spoiler douchery away, so I won't even attempt it. I'm astounded at what I just read, that's for sure, as it's realistic feel is off the charts, and I can't get it out of my head. A&E is not your cookie cutter romance, so if you're expecting that, you will be disappointed, because it's dark, gritty, and raw, but it's also real, and original. The way Kailee Reese Samuels portrays mental illness shows her brilliance on new levels, because she showed it in the realistic sense. And my emotions are still reeling from what I read. Not to mention, the twists & turns are crazy, like f-bombs dropping from every direction crazy, which also left me not knowing which end was up. My heart is torn up for the journey that it took to get to the ending, but life isn't perfect, and it's problems never fully go away. That's all I can really come off of, but I'm saying this, everyone needs to check out this author, and I HIGHLY HIGHLY HIGHLY RECOMMEND THIS STORY TO ALL!
1,723 reviews33 followers
January 9, 2018
Where do I begin with this book? I am an emotional mess. This book ensnared me from the beginning and enthralled me to the end. The way this writer wrote this story just blows me away. It is so beautifully written, and so respectful. The depth of emotions from these characters was so strong, so believable. It tells the story of Indigo and Alex and how their relationship spans over time. Indigo is the troubled girl and Alex is the guy every girl wants. Their chemistry is unreal and I loved all their interactions. At times I laughed and at times I cried. This book is true writing genius and everyone should read it. Absolutely amazing.
Profile Image for Holly Orrick.
49 reviews4 followers
January 10, 2018
I'm still kind of at a loss for words, so bare with me....

This beautifully written story is so raw and real. Some people are scared to talk about mental illness, self harm and what the pressures from the real world can do to us, but this author did not shy away and she did an exceptional job telling people about how it can be. She wrote the truth about how we can overcome our demons and how love really can help heal us. Indigo and Alex's story will be in my list of favorites and forever be in my heart. Bravo! An amazing five-star read!

Xoxo
Profile Image for Vanessa.
626 reviews11 followers
January 10, 2018
This was unlike any other book I have read. It touches on a subject that very few authors let alone Romance authors touch on. It was refreshing and shed light on so many things. While reading it I shed plenty of tears so make sure to have those tissues ready.
237 reviews3 followers
January 13, 2018
A&E Indigo is not your average woman,she goes' to the beat of her own drum. A life of living in a hippie commune seen to that. A chance meeting while out for the night with her friend Elliott she comes face to face with a blast from the past. Alex came from meager means but manage to score a great career in football.When he see's Indigo it takes him back to highschool. She's the one that got away, yes he could have anyone but it's her he wants. Alex tracks her down and brings her dinner,much to her surprise and shock. Indulging on the dinner a hot night of sex and an awesome breakfast Alex makes a proposal. Come with me to Hawaii for three weeks and see where this could lead between us. Indigo is unsure if she wants to go there again with Alex or anyone for that case. After an internal battle she agrees.Thinking that this could implode on them both. This is a hippie geek girl again meets the jock boy.You can only root for the two to work it out,and fall in love. 5 stars There are flash backs to their past's which gives you more incite to the lives they have had.





Profile Image for Beyond The Covers Blog.
2,518 reviews91 followers
January 23, 2018
A&E Indigo is not your average woman,she goes' to the beat of her own drum. A life of living in a hippie commune seen to that. A chance meeting while out for the night with her friend Elliott she comes face to face with a blast from the past. Alex came from meager means but manage to score a great career in football.When he see's Indigo it takes him back to highschool. She's the one that got away, yes he could have anyone but it's her he wants. Alex tracks her down and brings her dinner,much to her surprise and shock. Indulging on the dinner a hot night of sex and an awesome breakfast Alex makes a proposal. Come with me to Hawaii for three weeks and see where this could lead between us. Indigo is unsure if she wants to go there again with Alex or anyone for that case. After an internal battle she agrees.Thinking that this could implode on them both. This is a hippie geek girl again meets the jock boy.You can only root for the two to work it out,and fall in love. There are flash backs to their past's which gives you more incite to the lives they have had.
466 reviews5 followers
January 12, 2018

Unless you've dealt with someone with a mental illness you do not have a clue what that entails. I have to say, I loved this book. It was heartbreaking what lengths Indigo went through to deal with her demons. There were a few surprise revelations that left me wanting to kill a certain character. I can't say much without giving it away. Alex was a pleasant surprise. He was driven, gentle and caring. Determined to get the woman he loved even if it was just one day. He feels they are each half of a whole. He worked hard to get his golden arm to get him in a place to be able to take care of her. It's difficult to try to keep someone alive when all they want to do is die. But I don't think Indigo Bleu really wanted to die, she just didn't know how to live. Her demons and things that happened in the past kept her in a dark place. She will never be "normal " but who is.
Profile Image for Jenny.
284 reviews
January 29, 2018
This beautifully written story follows Indigo (Bleu) and Alex through their lives, and deals with mental illness. Ms Samuels tells stories of real characters who are flawed, and embody the good and bad aspects of being human.
Once again, Ms Samuels has left me an emotional wreck with her words and stunned with her ability to weave a story.
I highly recommend this - and all - of Kailee Reese Samuels' books.
34 reviews
January 31, 2018
What a beautifully written epic love story. This book pulls you in from the beginning and doesn’t let go until the end. Alex and Bleu, two scarred and incomplete people are each fighting their own demons and find a solace in one another.

Kailee Reese Samuels’ words are beautiful and poetic and paint a vivid picture of this heart wrenching love. She has yet again, created a story that is like no other.
Profile Image for Pam.
393 reviews31 followers
March 12, 2018
I'm not sure I read the same book as everyone else. There's so much love out there for this book. I just didn't connect to the characters....at...all. The way they thought and talked while in High School didn't sound like any Seniors in High School I have ever met. What I did love was that this Author tried to write about a very sensitive subject matter. This reminded me so much of Therapy by Kathryn Perez, which I absolutely LOVED! This one just wasn't for me.
135 reviews
February 12, 2021
I fell in love with Alex and Bleu and loved the mental health approach. My disconnect came with the Caroline character....Alex seemed so quick to develop not just a friendship, but a little more than that. And normally I'd say whatever, but this man was fighting with guns blazing for his girl and then this....seemed awkward to me.
59 reviews1 follower
February 27, 2018
Gripping and Real

She pulls you in from the start. A glimpse into the realities of dealing with a mental illness from both sides. The Story of Bleu and Alex will have you in tears and still let you laugh. Intense and Beautifully written. A must read!
Profile Image for Jennifer Richey.
1,992 reviews
March 10, 2018
Love it

Wow this book was about high school sweethearts Bleu & Alex the struggles and trials they went thru and they even lost their way but even true love finds its way back. Twists and turns in this book.
Profile Image for Sara Callaway.
336 reviews
December 28, 2019
Bleu and Alex

This is a my all time favorite book by this author. Bleu is just trying to survive and Alex just wants to love her. This is a book that sheds light on mental illness, it shows the ugly side as well as what life that be like with the right people in your corner.
358 reviews1 follower
October 4, 2022
Good Book

My first book by this author. It is well written and the characters are described well. It has good mental health representation. I can't wait to read more books by this author.
48 reviews3 followers
January 12, 2018
What do you say about a book that shatters you, yet give you hope? Breathtakingly ugly and beautiful! KRS brings us the story of Indy (Bleu) and Aex that spans years, first meeting in high school, one the star quarter back, one the misfit, one an addict, one dealing with severe mental issues. Indy suffered traumatically growing up and now is dealing with demons in silence, but how does she deal with it and at what cost to herself? Alex the kid from the trailer park with the Golden arm is king of school; with girls, popularity, and everything seemingly coming easy; but what price to his body? Thru a mutual friend they meet and let me tell you, you can feel the attraction and connection, even if Indy is scared to have those feelings. Alex knows something is off with her and guess what, he ain't going anywhere, he wants to help her, be a part of her life and even tells her they can start as friends. The going on in Indy's mind will have you in tears, you feel for her and may even recognize your own demons in her. Just when Alex thinks he has it all figured out and how Indy and him can leave and go to college and be together, something horrible happens, which ends up separating them. Lets just say I didn't think Indy would survive the outcome. There are characters you love and will hate, but I'll let you find this out for yourself. Alex grown up will melt your heart, he loves his Bleu (Indy) and is willing to do whatever it takes to save her, to make her realize she deserves to be happy, to be loved. And I understand her fear of destroying her light (him) and the things she does. This book does not sugar coat mental illness and the shapes it comes in, but rather gives us a harsh and heartbreaking look into reality, but also that light of hope and what love and support can help heal. If you have your demons, know that it's alright, you matter, you count in this world!!
Profile Image for Joanne Walker.
10 reviews
January 19, 2018
a & e is a completely different book of work by KRS
Samuels will take you on a roller coaster journey, through the past and present lives and relationship of Alex and Indigo.
They both come from two very different worlds, yet both crave the same things in one form or another...to be loved & accepted.
With so many pressures, internal demons, outside influences will there relationship last the test of time.

This is more than a love story....

In the midst of darkness within ones self....Is there light at the end....is there someone waiting to help pull you through when your at your lowest point!!
How far are you willing to go, for someone you love...
What would you give...for one day...
This is Indigo and Alex’s story

A story that will have you feeling the emotions written on the page....it’s heartbreaking, emotional, passionate and intense.
It had me intrigued from the very start, the characters back stories really made the story come alive and gave the reader a better understanding of both main characters. KRS also incorporated other relationships associated with the characters in detail, which showed how those relationships effected and shaped both Alex and Indigo into the people they are ,as well as the reason behind some of the decisions they made throughout there lives.
The secondary characters where well written, and an integral part of the story, the chemistry and banter between characters....outstanding!!!
Samuels scratches below the surface and showcases the many forms of mental illness, highlighting this debilitating disease.

If your after hearts and flowers, this book isn’t for you.....it’s Beautifully Broken!!

Thank you KRS for sharing this amazing story and highlighting not only the disease but the many aspects of mental health. To often the unsung heroes are not given a story....you have shown both sides brilliantly!!!




Profile Image for Romaine Heart.
2,337 reviews30 followers
May 10, 2019
"Sometimes in life, you only get one chance to make an impact one someone else's life...."
Alex may be an all star quarterback, popular with the girls, good grades but he fights his demons with an addiction. His unconditional love for Indigo is rare. Not only does he love her but her demons and her mental illness as well.
"The lie will stain my heart while guarding his soul.."
Indigo has fought her mental illness issues since she was a child. She doesn't realize just how strong she really is. With the love and support of Tori she will begin to have light brought into her dark world.
I could feel Bleu's pain and the love her and Alex shared.
"Do not always choose the easy route. You do not know what obstacle may lay ahead in the middle of the road. Follow your instincts...."
One thing I admire about Kailee Samuels is that she isn't afraid to write about taboo subjects that other authors tend to shy away from.
"So my destination resided somewhere between a runway and a straight jacket."
I'm speechless!! A & E is about mental illness. Depression. Bi-polar. Cutting. An indepth look into one's mind that is suffering. The joys, the anguish, the pain, the spiraling downwards and the emotional turmoil one faces daily. A heartbreaking story that will touch your heart and soul.
"...our love floats and the bad things sink..."
Kailee Samuels has written a beautiful masterpiece that I feel everyone should read whether you suffer from mental illness or have a loved one who suffers. A & E will definitely shed some light on the subject.
I recommend anything written by this amazing author!!
Profile Image for Jay Williams.
239 reviews1 follower
January 6, 2018
Indigo "Bleu" is out with her best friend Elliot "El" at a club, she is not your regular girl, Indigo is also a tattoo artist. In the club she bumps into her ex who later turns up at her door they end up having an amazing night of sex & Alex asks her to go with him to Hawaii. After some soul searching she agrees 21 days to see if they can make ago of it.
Rewind to their school days, before they got together Indigo feels like an outcast she has no friends until Oliva who is determined to bring Indigo out of her shell, Olivia is also Alex's best friend. Alex thinks that he has the world at his feet, though he is addicted to prescription painkillers and has random sexual encounters with any of the willing girls lining up to get a piece of him. Indigo does not want anything to do with Alex despite finding him very attractive. Indigo had alot of issues going in inside herself I don't wish to expand on this as I feel it needs to be read. The relationship between the two of them is a slow burner as she does not trust people, though when they come together it is beautiful. Though their lives are tingued with sadness that no teenager should have to deal with. They struggle, they lose each other and find each other. I really don't wish to give too much away but I loved this book so much I read it within two days it was one of those that made me want to get to the end as I needed to know what happened. Kailee has tackled the issues within the book very well and with just enough sensitivity and humour all I can say it simply amazing highly recommended read
Profile Image for Em Dorsey ~ A Darlin’ Doll and Her Books ~.
334 reviews9 followers
January 11, 2018
“I breathe through to the end because my soul refuses to let me die.”

What happens when the crazy misfit girl and the star QB fall for each other?
One horrible moment, one tragic incident beyond your control can change your life forever.

“He is a dream; I am the nightmare.
It was never his fault.”

A&E is a beautiful, heart wrenching story that I was not prepared for. Due to personal reasons I could really relate and connect to one of the main characters. I felt every ounce of their pain and turmoil. This book deals a lot with mental illness and not just a simple bout of depression. This is not an easy subject to write about but Kailee Reese Samuels once again pulled it off flawlessly.

“I fight every fucking day to just breathe. It is an exhausting battle and a war I will lose eventually.”

I can’t say much more without spoiling it so I’ll just say that Alex Torino and Indigo Swann have a rocky and intense history. We get to experience the love and sorrow that they have felt throughout the years. Their connection is not something that can be easily broken. Both are damaged but have the biggest hearts and are strong in their own way. You will have tears in your eyes and a smile on your face while reading their story. I loved every heartbreaking second of this book. If you are looking for a well written emotionally intense book I absolutely recommend A&E.

“I need you—all of your good, all of your bad, all of your crazy. I need your darkness to balance all the blinding light.”

5 “Stay just one day.” Stars!!


~ Read on behalf of Two Darlin Dolls and a Book Review Blog
Displaying 1 - 30 of 78 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.