Boy Soldiers

Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: Man, this stuff is great. It's opening up my lungs, it's making me breathe easier.

Ricardo Montoya: Evidently it's making you fart easier, too.

Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: I didn't fart.

Ricardo Montoya: It's the first rule of prep school etiquette. When you're in a basement with no windows, don't fart.

Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: No, the first rule of prep school etiquette is to pretend you're asleep when your roommate's beating off.

Henry "Hank" Giles, III: No, the first rule of prep school etiquette is to wait until your roommate falls asleep before beating off.

Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: Was that a personal remark directed at me, roommate?

Henry "Hank" Giles, III: Choke your chicken. It's yours.

Jonathan "Snuffy" Bradberry: You slap your monkey all the time! I can't sleep at night!