Top Dog

STAR RATING:*****Unmissable****Very Good***Okay**You Could Go Out For A Meal Instead*Avoid At All Costs

Oh dear.Dire with a capital D,this one.

Jake Fellon (Chuck Norris) is a veteran police cop who is brought back in from suspension to thwart a racist organization who are plotting to set off a bomb at an impending peace conference.His new partner:a dog,who,inexplicably,rescued a baby from a burning building.

Against the backdrop of this tasteless plot outline,a fine concept to try and wrangle laughs out of,we are also left to contend with a drab script and Norris,who has enough trouble turning in a decent performance,let alone trying to be funny.

The action's another hinderance.Because,like the rest of the film,it stinks.What is it in Norris movies,especially in his newer ones,where one of the bad guys always seems to go 'uh oh' in that really dumb,cornball way whenever he's about to perform a front hand punch on their faces?

If this poor man's Turner & Hooch isn't Norris's worst film,it's certainly a fu*king strong contender.*