Second viewing of this trash epic confirms that my initial 10/10 was anything but unwarranted. You know you're getting awfully close to the absolute nadir of b-movie cinema, to that horrifying point of no return beyond all shame and therefore beyond reproach, when your name is Amir Shervan and you go on to follow up your cheapo Lethal Weapon cash-in called 'Hollywood Cop' with a cash-in on Maniac Cop by casting Robert Z'dar in a movie called 'Samurai Cop', a no-budget action crime flick where Z'dar is neither samurai nor cop (not even a maniac for that matter), where even protagonist Matt Hannon, actor in the broadest sense of the term, looks more like a poolboy instead of a samurai. Of course when you make an entire movie for no other reason than to cash-in on the larger-than-frame persona of an actor who made a career playing such refined characters as Igor, Mongoose, Brutis, Cobra Khan, Bongo and of course let's not forget the aptly descriptive Face (!) in Tango and Cash, it's not so much a question of good or bad, but whether it's going to be "this makes even Battlefield Earth seem watchable" bad or "break out the beers - Lady Terminator" bad.
Thankfully you don't need to get any further than the opening 15 minutes to know the answer to the above question; a staggeringly amazing prologue of b-movie awesomeness which, among other things, serves to introduce the Katana Gang, which counts within its ranks a red-haired chick whose entire contribution to the gang is announcing the entrance of the boss ("The boss is here"), the samurai cop and his mandatory black sidekick indulging in a little sex talk with the blonde helicopter operator bimbette in the middle of a drug bust, sped-up chases followed by amazing dialogue ("shoot", "faster", "shoot", "go faster") and a sex scene with underwear on (hey, it's low budget) between blonde bimbette and lovable hunk Matt Hannon.
What else do you need? Have you ever wondered what the real samurai code is (a real samurai always gets his weapon from his Katana Gang henchman)? Did you always want to know what is the mandatory hairstyle all Katana Gang henchmen ought to keep at all times (a mullet)? Did you always complain to anyone who'd listen that cinema doesn't have enough gay Costa rican waiters cracking jokes about suicide? Were you always itching to see security guards calling for security? The Katana Gang red-haired chick enriching world culture with the line "I'm going to change the trash" (!!)? Everyone in the movie getting sliced up while Matt Hannon is too busy canoodling another bimbo in a pool? Nurses randomly asking Matt Hannon if he wants to have sex with them, then belittling him for his circumcised penis? Matt Hannon pondering on whether he should make the arrest during or after the suspect has finished having sex, finally making his mind only to be stopped by a sliding door (!!!)? A beach house transforming into a house in the suburbs between takes? Well, here's your chance.
Yes, just break out the beers. I've seen quite a few no-budget schlockfests in my time but Samurai Cop stands tall among such venerable classics as Werewolf, Timechasers and American Commando - Angel's Blood Mission 2 as one of the most triumphant displays of unintentionally hilarious genius. See this if you're cool.
