Mission: Killfast

This film is so close to being a trash action classic that it's really a shame that it can't quite pull it off. Some gangsters are selling weapons to some mercenaries, and (probably?) some stolen nuclear detonators. The government can't intervene (for reasons that are amazingly unclear), so they recruit martial arts dude Tiger Yang (playing himself!). The first third is so packed full of wonderfully bent storytelling that it's a serious letdown when it finally becomes so bogged down in plot, characters and exposition that you can't hope to follow it anymore. A mobster's son runs a pornographic magazine that has one or maybe two government moles working there ... but then the son also turns out to be a mole. The daughter of a government agent killed in the line of duty (I assume this happened in the movie, but I don't remember it happening) vows revenge against the gangster. A hit man named "Cocoa Charlie" poses as a cop by wearing Groucho Marx style fake eyebrows and then rapes and murders a woman. It sounds like it may be fun, but it's just scene after scene of characters talking and talking. It doesn't help that Tiger Yang cannot act or really even speak English well. Then it all goes delightfully off the rails in an action climax that's positively avant-garde ... people blow up, buildings burn, and the exact same sequences are used over and over again. The whole thing is almost worth it if you can wait through 40 minutes of sheer confusing boredom.