Squirters Sex Blog

As a Nick Orleans fan from way back, I'm dismayed at how low he's fallen. Nearly all his contemporaries have retired, but Nick continues to fashion features for Adam & Eve release that are antiquated and downright silly, like this phony treatment of the Squirting craze in porn.

Nick and his regular screenwriter Allison Leigh pretend to take the subject seriously, with Alexis Fawx in the lead role vainly trying to create a character who becomes obsessed with learning how to squirt as if her life depended upon it. Her livelihood does, since the blog she runs with young Cindy Starfall has had its ownership bought out, and the new bosses demand articles about squirting, based on first-hand knowledge, or the ladies will lose their jobs.

This is silly and ridiculously sentimental from start to finish, beginning with Fawx, the prototypical MILF of our day, supposedly a co-ed hanging out with other college kids like Starfall, a miscasting by a mile. Much talk of using instructional tapes and guides to learn the art of squirting struck me as about as believable as a serious camp for learning the sport of wrestling run by Vince McMahon.

When the women eventually learn to squirt, we do get a more realistic dribble of liquid rather than the fountains of Poland Spring or urine that is displayed by a young professional here, Kallie Jo. The actors take their work seriously, rather than making fun of the risible material.

This flop's fate is similar to most projects of this sort of late: the sex scenes are excerpted quickly into one of Adam & Eve's lengthy compilation videos, in this case on the topic of Squirting.