Rumbo a la muerte

Haunted Boat, what a movie name! Sounds like a working title they forgot to update doesn't it?

It tells the story of six 20 somethings who go out on a boat to party and weird things happen and.....yeah....so.....wow.

I was immediatly struck by its low rating, at time of writing it's sat at 2.1 and that's incredibly low. It takes a special breed of movie to get a rating like that and I was convinced this wouldn't be one of them. It is, it really really is.

For me to rate a movie 1/10 means it has no redeeming features at all, it means it fails on literally every single front and that's an accomplishment in itself and very rare.

The story is non-sensical, the sfx are awful, the cast/characters are forgettable, the construction is dire and the soundtrack! Is so poorly done I can't even put into words. They play stock music that doesn't even remotely go with the scene and it's so inappropriate I actually laughed out loud.

Haunted Boat is one of the worst films I've seen in years, it's a masterclass on how not to make a movie and something that makes the Sharknado films look Oscar worthy by comparison.

The Good:

Hahahahahahaha NO!

The Bad:

Terrible cutaway scenes

Laughable sfx

Really poor title

Awful cover art

Random soundtrack that just doesn't fit the scenes

Stock screams

Dreadful "Plot"

Things I Learnt From This Movie:

You can identify Amish folk by their faces

The "I fear no evil" passage of the bible has never worked in the history of movies