Such were the immortal words uttered (repeatedly) by our make-up-obsessed heroine Brigita in this movie. I don't know what made her come to this conclusion, but whatever it was about this uncircumcised cock of a country Brigita fancied so much, it certainly wasn't our cinema. Svara med foto is another one in a long line of Swedish films seemingly made for no target audience in particular, which makes no attempts to appeal to anybody in any way. The saddest part about this grand sh*tfest of a film is that two people actually voted 10 (at the time of this writing) and they were being *serious*! How far can you stretch the term "good for a Swedish flick"?! This wasn't even good for a pile feces! I've taken dumps that looked and smelled better than this flick! In fact the best thing would be if I simply stopped talking about this movie since just thinking about it makes me feel dirty all over. Sadly, I feel it is my duty to warn you of this horrid filth before you accidentally ...*gasp*... watch it for yourself.
The plot of this one really is something!! Gasp in excitement as Latvian Brigita moves in with a geeky scientist who's pushing forty and still doesn't have the courage to talk to a woman! Feel the romantic atmosphere as he shows her his various mold farms in his basement! Enjoy the bittersweet sorrow of watching Lasse and his sister offer Brigita chicken for dinner when she is in fact a vegetarian! Absorb the awesome power of film-making as Lasse's sister says she has to make a phone call and picks up a phone that has been ringing for a minute! Or better yet, just watch xXx 2 or something. The Fast and the Furious. How about both? Anything is better than this awful pile of junk. I mean, it's not really Sweden's answer to 'Manos' The Hands of Fate, but it's close. It's hard to believe that Svara med foto wasn't made this bad on purpose. Everything about it is just so wrong, so utterly laughable. My eyes were literally hurting while watching it.
In the end Lasse reveals himself to be a freaky, psychopathic stalker, which Brigita finds incredibly romantic. This would be awesome if the movie wasn't so implausible, boring, stupid and slow. And what the hell is with the soundtrack? It's indescribable! It's like someone strapped a spastic person to a soundboard and let him kick lose. Overall, if you don't have something better to do - and with "something better" I include suicide, staring at the ceiling, and eating small arachnids - see this movie. If in fact you have a brain and don't want to sit in front of the TV like a cross between John Hurt in 1984 and Malcolm McDowell in Clockwork Orange, avoid this film. In fact, if you find it at home behind some dusty bookcase, burn it. Blow it up. Just avoid it. Don't say I didn't warn you. I can't believe I wasted so much time of this awful film.
SHORT REVIEW: In case I was being too subtle: this movie is utter crap. Avoid like the plague.
(r#107)
