Pete Winning and the Pirates: The Motion Picture

I like schlock as much as the next guy. Love a good, humorous schlock movie. But there is a certain level of expectation-- which this film falls short of in all counts.

From the squeaky-voice lead character to the incoherent plot to ridiculous script-- this takes all the fun out of schlock. The lines are terrible (not funny terrible, just terrible), and it totally lacks in all concept of common sense. Okay, you're out to sea, boarded by "bad guys" from another ship, whom you overcome after they've put holes in your boat. So what do you do... take their ship right? No, you risk losing all the crew by swimming to shore in shark-infested waters. And how did they overcome the bad guys? Because despite having multi-fire laser pistols, it seems the only thing the bad guys can hit is the broadside of a boat! Seriously?

This is one of the worst movies I've seen outside of something with "cheerleader", "barbarian" or "graveyard" in the title. I have no idea how it won awards in anything outside of Raspberries. Honestly... has the film-viewing community been totally brainwashed by Transformer movies?

Bad writing, bad directing, terrible acting. Just bad. Sure-fire candidate as fodder for Mystery Science Theater.