So, I get this movie on the basis that it's supposedly a remake of Tombs of the Blind Dead, a good movie. It's all in Spanish and the closest thing to Spanish I can speak is a little Latin. No problem, I'll fast forward to the Templars.
Yeah, right, what Templars? The movie starts out with some eeeeeevil cultists meandering around a ruined church, carrying torches. For all the world they look like Ku Klux Klansmen. Then, onto something completely different, as four female friends check into a rather large resort that seems to have no guests and only one guy staffing it.
I'd be alarmed, wouldn't you? They apparently aren't, as they start having all sorts of graphic (for a movie of this calibre) lesbian sex. Quite a bit of nudity. Easy on the eyes, as well. Anyhow, some other mysterious guy shows up, has sex with two of the four women, then has a couple discussions with them. Is the the one that threw a meat cleaver at them when they were doing some nude sunbathing? What's with that creepy little guy spying on them? All negated, as one of the women (who was hiking around some church ruins) is killed by a death cult of some sort that bears no resemblance whatsoever to the promised Templars. More chicanery occurs before the main character is raped and...something. She shows up, offs the other two females. The Klan is defeated (?) by a giant cross, then walks off as the movie ends. I think my copy is missing a minute or two, because the ending as such is terrible, there are no credits, yadda yadda.
The movie itself is dull. There're none of the promised Templar knights, just some Klansmen with really dry skin. There's no gore, no violence, and the film-making is inept. Several scenes last entirely too long, several close-ups are impossible to make out, the absence of any type of music in many parts is annoying, and the death cult appears from nowhere.
Since the nudity and lesbianism is the only reason a male would want to watch this film, it'd be more recommended to pick up some sort of porn. Recommendation to avoid this film, even from a completist point of view.
