Elskling

I have rarely seen a more obvious Oscar candidate for "Best Picture". It goes straight to the heart, almost attacking the souls of anyone who has experienced a, let's say, normal romantic relationship that lasted beyond the honeymoon phase and ended in a breakup.

You could hear a pin drop in the theater from start to finish. Especially in the second half, it was intense-a psychological shaking that pulls and tugs at the audience, yet restrained and understated, which made the impact even more powerful.

Director Lilja Ingolfsdottir, who also wrote the screenplay and designed the costumes, has created the best film of the year. She has brought on Norwegian actors, relatively unknown, to deliver performances of absolute world-class caliber.

I don't usually watch movies like these, and as a man, romance / drama is really not my cup of tea most of the time. But I wanted to watch this movie because the premise seemed interesting. This movie is way more interesting than it looks at first glance and definitely goes deep inside the human psyche. Goes to show how our family dynamics really affect how we evolve as adults and how ego and personal insecurities can ruin good, loving relationships. The main actress is awesome. I was in awe of her performance from the start of the movie, till the credits. She could have been a Hollywood star if she had been in the US.

9/10 definitely recommend.

A passionate relationship leads to marriage and children, and seven years later they find themselves stuck in what might just be an all-too recognisable urban family hell in the post-women's lib era, in which none of the members of the household feel they get the time, space, attention, and love they deserve and need. None more so than wife and mother of four, Maria (Helga Guren), who detests her husband's every hint of happiness and achievement in light of her own lack of such. When she lashes out at him one final time, his patience and tolerance are pushed to the brink, and he becomes cold and disinterested. First-time director Lilja Ingolfsdottir creates interpersonal drama with a depth and magnitude that even Ingmar Bergmann would be proud of. Elskling scrutinises its characters and relationships relentlessly, never allowing them (or us) the slightest respite from their own shortcomings or self-pity. There is an optimism in Ingolfsdottir's work, but it is well-hidden under the characters' defiance, insecurities, and rationalisations, and once we finally get to the much-awaited catharsis, it's not a typical movie catharsis of our protagonist changing her ways, but of her having slowly realised and come to terms with some of the mechanisms behind her problems. Elskling is a powerful, demanding and sometimes funny drama that isn't designed to make you happy, except perhaps about your own life as the credits start rolling. There are strong, stripped-down performances by the two lead actors, especially Guren.

As a Norwegian, I felt like praising this film. I think it is appropriate, Norwegian film was both ridiculed and often poorly reviewed when I was growing up. There have been some exceptions over the years, but this one puts Norwegian film on the map!

In professional reviews of this film, it was written that all couples should see this film. I would add that it is for absolutely everyone, single or in a relationship.

The film is a close and intimate insight into a relationship that is slowly but surely unraveling. I think many people can identify with the conflicts we witness. This is about blaming other loved ones and blaming them for something that we should perhaps point the finger at ourselves. So the starting point for the film is a fairly young couple, who are struggling terribly. Then the film's main character is revealed and confronted with a different reality than the one she has been hiding behind herself. This phase of the film is incredibly strong and credible. I don't think I've ever seen any actors manage to convey such vulnerability on film before. That this film wasn't Norway's Oscar hope last year is a big mystery to me. But then it has certainly picked up many other film awards. So deserved.

A warm recommendation.

For anyone out there who had/has a family member suffering from mental health issues, or he/she him/herself struggling with such malaise, this film certainly hits home. And it hits hard.

The "familiarity" with which it brought me all these thoughts of my mother - taking care of 4 kids, being 'entrapped' - and how I got affected by her raising me, incapable of being in touch with my emotions and having any connection, to anyone...

I cried. I cried hard, throughout this movie, for the similarities with my own life, my mother's, and my own human experience, are simply hard to ignore...

I wish by now this is less of a taboo - talking about mental state and having difficulty to cope with life in general. I left the theater a bit disoriented, wishing I could talk to someone about what I had just experienced, but failing to think of anyone I could call up...

Loneliness...

Guess this says it all. It resonated and touched me because of strictly personal reasons, but I wish everyone had the open mind and heart to watch this movie and take lessons from it - we're all different, some of us have more difficulty being in touch with their emotions, and pushing people away is not done in self-defense, it's done out of fear.