Yvonne D'Angers, famous Frisco stripper back in the Carol Doda era, was one of my '60s dream girls, having seen her in a fabulous spread in the oddball men's magazine "Broadside" (a sort of "Ramparts" for dirty minded guys). I later saw her briefly in Russ Meyer's ill-fated mainstream movie THE SEVEN MINUTES, but reading about her starring role in SAPPHO DARLING got my hopes up.
This Albert Zugsmith travesty was a big deal at adult theaters back in its initial release, but has fallen into obscurity since, mainly because it no longer had novelty value and is of poor quality. But that never stopped John Waters' movies from achieving cult status!
Carol Young stars as Sappho, a pretty girl who overly identifies with her namesake, the Greek poet Sappho, whose works are heavily quoted in the film's pretentious voice-over. She wants to remain virginal, much to the consternation of her creepy boyfriend Sven (Alyn Darnay).
He's named Sven because writer and uncredited producer Zugsmith ludicrously styles this farrago as taking place in Sweden, replete with poorly-matched occasional stock footage of Svenska locations. This was to ride the '60s porn wave of hot-hot imports, which got underway with the smash hit DEAR JOHN (also now sadly forgotten) and continued with INGA and I A WOMAN.
Sappho picks up a top-heavy hitchhiker Brigitte (the inimitable Yvonne D'Angers) and offers her a place to stay while the new arrival seeks work. Brigitte gets hired at a massage parlor, interviewed by a comely woman who the Something Weird shill (back of video box liner notes) and others have misidentified as Uschi Digard -some folks need new pairs of glasses.
SPOILERS ALERT:
Typical of the hothouse scripts Zugsmith was famous for (his next porn assignment TWO ROSES AND A GOLDEN ROD is even worse), film is plot-heavy and thoroughly unconvincing at every turn. Brigitte reveals she was victimized by five hoods, chanting "Gang...Rape" (film's campiest element) and has been emotionally scarred ever since.
Boy friends try to rape both Sappho and Brigitte in later reels, fended off with handy household implements like a broom or teapot. A massage parlor client (Sally Sanford) is a stereotypical lesbian who makes the moves on Brigitte and later drops by with a tall-tall gal pal (Julia Blackburn) to abortively attempt to party with Brigitte and Sappho. This nonsense is all filler surrounding the picture's key sexploitation content: the two stars taking a shower together and ultimately enjoying the Sapphic lesbian sex in bed we've all been waiting for.
Actually, the shower scene demonstrates effective casting: D'Angers' fabulous silicone breasts and dark, wide nipples, pressed against slight Young's tiny breasts with their perky nipples. This is quality porn.
Unfortunately a few minutes of arousal material is encased in an indigestible Zugsmith package. The purple prose reaches one of its many nadir moments when the gals discuss "inner beauty" and "Does size matter?" from strictly a girly point-of-view as written in insulting fashion by a hasn't-got-a-clue man. His poster advertising at the time accused himself of being an Academy Award winner -talk about fraudulent wishful thinking! Fictitious director is credited as "Gunnar Steele", most likely a pseudonym for Zugsmith.
