One Man Force

I was working at a video store when I found this tape on sale for $1. I couldn't resist: the title, the graphics, and even the tag line ("Jake Swan vs. the LAPD: Now the sides are even!").

On one hand, the movie has everything you might want: a highly original plot (tough cop's good partner killed, starting an out-of-control revenge thing), crappy synthesizer music with the standard 80s electric guitar riffs, witty one-liners, vaguely memorable action scenes, and even some well-intentioned messages about smoking dope. On the other hand, even I couldn't bear the whole thing. But it's definitely worth it for certain moments, like when John Matuszak "goes wild" and wrecks his boss' desk after being told he's out of control. And who could forget the searing innuendo when he tells a woman who comments on how big and tall he is that "everything is in proportion." That's the sort of thing that stays with you for a while, although apparently not that long, because I'm already having trouble remembering a lot of this movie.

What it comes down to is that you really must just see this movie for yourself. Get a pack of Schlitz, a couple Slim Jims, and pretend it's still 1989, if only for an hour and a half. But bear in mind that if you pay more than a couple dollars for it, you'll probably hate yourself.