Britney Spears Live from Las Vegas

Catching this on TV was an odd experience- it was like a Rob Zombie concert, but instead of cool music and monster imagery it was a salute to a "Cherry 2000"-esque robot which lurched and jerked about the stage, belting out pre-recorded, pre-formed pop songs with all the skill and precision of Teddy Ruxpin.

The high point of delirious stupidity is when drunken "Noah's Ark" star Jon Voight (who must sit during his whole appearance, save he stumble off the stage and land head first in the orchestra pit in a puddle of his own Scotch-flavored vomit) appears, slurring a bedtime story to a "young" Britney.

The rest of the show is spastic, sub-"Mickey Mouse Club" dancing briefly seen between pre-recorder video bits. Appearing lost and queasy in this multi-media propaganda event is the clueless sex-puppet Britney (who is made of 85% recycled materials). She seems like one of those cherubic young girls whose soul-less, bitter moms force to prostitute themselves up for subhuman beauty contests, only this beauty contest is lasting Britney's whole life and the grand prize is having middle-aged fathers fantasize about her in the shower.