The Spy Who Caught a Cold

This film could have been written by me. Not because I'm a particularly good writer or anything. And apparently the woman who wrote this is a highly acclaimed novelist. But the film seems to mirror my own childhood in an uncanny way. My mum raised us alone from when I was 6. As part of what I guess was a sort of Shirley Valentine reinvention of herself from when I was 8 and my brother was 6, she would take us all to nudist beaches every summer. It didn't matter if we were in the South of France or Basildon, every year she would find somewhere for us to go where she could disrobe and soak in sun. She and my brother were always enthusiastic about it. They would strip off as soon as we got there and not dress again until we were practically in the car. They weren't exhibitionists normally. I think they just loved the freedom of it. Plus, on a nudist beach, who's judging you? Everyone else is naked too. Well, except me. I almost never joined in, preferring to climb on sand dunes or sit reading a book while fully clothed thank you very much. The first time we went one of those places it was mandatory that everyone get naked, which made me very upset. I don't know if it was the thought of being looked at by all those people, if I had some hangups developing about my body, if I just didn't like beaches and the heat. I don't know. That first time, a compromise was reached by having me walk onto the beach dressed and then quickly stripping while sitting on a beach towel. I stayed sat down the whole time, despite the encouragement of my mum and brother. Then, when it was time to leave, on came the clothes quickly and off we went. From then on we went to clothing optional beaches, where nobody minded either way. For those who have never been to one of them, the population of nudist beaches is probably 80% old fat men. Great that they don't care who sees them, but frankly as a child I was more interested in hiding somewhere and laughing at their bottoms and willies than being seen naked myself by them. I would see my mum chatting away to them completely unconcerned about her being naked. As my brother tore around in the background running in and out of the surf with other small children. I remember feeling tremendous envy that they were open and free as that. So I disguised my jealousy as contempt. I think the only proper time I went the whole hog was when I was 10 or so. We were on holiday in Northumbria with a family we met on one of those beaches. The kids were two girls between my and my brother's age and there was a special designated beach we went to. I remember it was pouring with rain, and all the adults, kids and dogs were splashing about in the water with nothing on. Yeah the dogs weren't wearing any clothes of course. But the humans weren't either! Meanwhile, I huffed and puffed in my kagool on a picnic blanket. They all seemed like they were having so much fun. And there I was, sitting by myself. Looking a right fool. Then they turned around to me and started yelling come on! Join in! I had enough. So I stood up, took a deep breath. And quick as I could I took off my kagool, my shoes, my socks, my t shirt, my vest, my leggings... and finally my pants, and I was naked as God made me. Everyone cheered as I ran down to the surf and got stuck in. When I got going I was more enthusiastic than anyone. Long after the adults had got dressed and put up umbrellas I was out there prancing about. I even stayed nude for the return car journey! It was me and the older girl from the other family sitting in the back chatting naked! Waving to people in other cars! But, next year, I was back to my old self scoffing at these "kinky nudies", as the girl in the film puts it. I remember the feelings the film describes really clearly. In fact, after my naked fun that one year, I even caught a cold too! And I found it a really genuine piece of work. It's a great depiction of that period of your life where you don't understand why adults do the things they do. You might very well choose to mock or scoff at them for doing those things. Before you, in the end, join in. Highly recommended, but I would mention that the film contains sex and bad language. And that every single cast member appears naked at one point or another. Including the main three of the girl, the mum, and the new boyfriend.