The Vampire Next Door

The special effects budget was about £2.50, most of which was spent on red corn syrup and eyeliner to draw squiggly lines on Victoria's face. Victoria's costumes came from the SHEIN Halloween sale. Cameron was as likeable as Covid on your birthday and at least then you still get presents. Why Diane was vaguely interested in Cameron was the greatest mystery as she was a beautiful woman and he looked like a McDonald's employee. For the entire film the ice cream shop didn't have a single customer to save on the cost of extras. All of this terribleness was why I couldn't stop watching this movie until the end. At one point it seemed like it was going to turn into a porno but alas no as this did seem to be the director's true calling. All the actors gave it their best shots with what little they had to work with. Gold stars to you all and to the director and writer I will leave you with the comment my sister's teacher gave her in a school report "Jessica always likes to contribute in class however the relevance of her contributions are not always apparent".