Of course I had never heard about this 2023 natural disaster movie titled "Arctic Armageddon" prior to stumbling upon it here in 2024. And given my love of natural disaster movies, despite the fact that the majority of them are crap, then of course I opted to give the movie a chance.
And seeing those two dreaded words on the screen, The Asylum, as the movie started, I have to admit that my expectations to the movie went from slim to none. Yeah, The Asylum aren't exactly known for their stellar movies. But every now and again they do spew out something worthwhile.
"Arctic Armageddon" wasn't one of those rare instances where The Asylum churned out an impressive movie. In fact, writers Jeremiah Crothers and Tammy Klein delivered a massive heap of a dumpster fire. The entire movie was pointless, and it just amazingly boring and dull. There was so little of any natural disaster going on throughout the course of the 86 minutes that the movie ran for. Instead we are treated to the communication of people stuck in a submarine and some spearhead government group of people on land. Talk about a swing and a miss of a narrative.
The only face on the cast list that I was familiar with was actor Patrick Labyorteaux. The acting performances in the movie were actually fair enough, but nothing outstanding or memorable, especially when taking into consideration the total lack of a properly interesting script and narrative that they had to work with.
The effects in the movie weren't bad, and it is good to see that The Asylum are investing more in their effects department in comparison to their older movies.
While I managed to endure the staggering 86 minutes of boredom that is "Arctic Armageddon", this is definitely not a natural disaster movie that I would recommend you to waste your time, money or effort on. Some of us suffered through this, so you don't have to; you're very welcome.
My rating of director James Mahoney's 2023 movie "Arctic Armageddon" lands on a two out of ten stars.
