Of course it was a mistake to watch. Of course I was going to regret it. But when has that ever stopped me?
Being extremely low-budget is one thing. The nuts and bolts of this flick are far worse and can't be waved off by connoting a lack of resources, for to be frank, it comes across that no one involved was making an earnest effort, in any way. From the very, very beginning we suffer through weak production design, gauche and empty "acting," inauthentic lighting, tiresome vocal effects, and achingly rancid "effects." (Admittedly, the effects stop short, but only just, of literally being the worst I've ever seen.) The dialogue is putrescent, and the scene writing; try to put the idea of "characters" out of your mind altogether. The story concept at least has ideas that could be fun as a B-movie, and I indeed discern minor influence from the best 'Friday the 13th' installment, 'Jason X' - but again, in the case of 'Amityville in space,' no one was really trying. If they had, I'd be saying something very different.
The music can at least claim good thoughts, though the compositions as they exist are too forthright and overt, and the audio mix is imbalanced. Every now and then some element might accidentally be less that absolutely abhorrent. Then again, Mark Polonia's direction is painfully limp, the production values are so bare-faced as to hurt the eyes, and the "costume design" consists of materials that would never get sold at the local thrift store. The editing and cinematography are as egregious as the acting, the script, and everything else. If anyone meaningfully applied themselves this could have had a chance at being somewhat enjoyable; I've seen no-budget amateur horror that far outpaced major studio productions because the hard work and care was readily recognized. However, since no one who participated in this slop could be bothered to put in more than one day's work, or one take of a given scene, the result is completely exhausting. Literally exhausting; it took me the better part of four hours to get through these seventy-five minutes once. Good grief, the promotional artwork received more attention than anything in the film itself!
Please learn from my mistake. Please don't let my folly be in vain. Curiosity is the only reason one could ever have for watching this feature, and I must urgently advise that following one's curiosity is in this case a dire mistake. 'Amityville in space' is atrocious muck, and I vehemently recommend against ever pointing your browser in its direction.
