Alfred Hitchcock presenta

[Hitchcock arrives for his introduction dressed in a safari outfit and pith helmet]

Alfred Hitchcock - Host: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to darkest Hollywood. Night brings a stillness to the jungle. It is so quiet, you can hear a name drop. The savage beasts have already begun gathering at the water holes to quench their thirst. Now one should be especially alert. The vicious table-hopper is on the prowl, and the spotted back-biter may lurk behind a potted palm. To take me through this most savage of lands, I have hired a native guide.

[He snaps his fingers. An old man joins him, wearing a billboard sign that reads, "Maps of the Movie Stars' Homes - For Sale"]

Alfred Hitchcock - Host: He claims to know where I can find the big ones.