I've watched a few episodes of Fox's Trading Spouses and I liked some of the episodes a lot. I especially loved the episode that takes a man from Southern America and puts him in a New York city apartment with a very rich New York family. The two families were different, yes, but the Southern man tries to fit in with the new culture and does a very good job. The host family was nice and treated him like a guest. What was nice was the way the host family carried on as normal.
Most episodes of Wife Swap are different, however. Like Trading Spouses, the families are completely different, but the problem is that instead of simply having the wife living with a new family the show tries to start a fight by getting each wife to read some sort of manual about the other family and then after a while to set rules. The wives who swap don't even try to adapt to the environment. They are intolerant of other cultures. They loudly and proudly hold on to their way of life, thinking it is superior, and try to change the other people in the process. I hate it most when the wives tell us at the beginning who they are. You don't learn about who someone is by listening to what they say because their ideals about what they should be will get in the way with what they really are. There's a reason why people buy status symbols like large cars and large houses. They are trying to express themselves and project signals to others so they can be recognized as belonging to a certain social identity. Too many families use Wife Swap as a vehicle to show off their identity. Everything the parents do on the show, whether it is sport or shouting at their kids, is just another weak attempt to conform to an image or a stereotype.
It's not just the contrived conflict that makes Wife Swap so painful to watch but also the fact that you know the wives are posing for the camera. It is so clear these women are desperately trying to show off their identity for the world to see. In other words, they are acting, and that goes against what I expect in reality TV.
