The most aggravating movies, in my opinion, are the ones where the premise sounds like something that could make for a really awesome movie but the actual product falls completely flat. Dylan DOG is not a horrible movie, it's just another movie that might entertain a bit while you watch it...might elicit a chuckle at times...but overall is completely forgettable. It's based off an Italian graphic novel that I'd honestly never heard of, but might be interested in checking out to see if it's better than the movie. Dylan Dog is a private investigator in New Orleans who finds himself confronted by a part of his past that he thought he'd left behind. Before Dog began catering to the city's sleazy human population, he was an investigator for the paranormal citizens of the city: vampires, werewolves, and zombies all living quietly alongside us. When a werewolf appears to have murdered a human, Dog is drawn back in to his old life to investigate and uncovers a plot to unleash an ancient evil that could wreak havoc on the supernatural underworld before ultimately spilling over onto humanity.
I've seen this movie twice now and I can barely remember anything about it. That's not a good sign. I really thought this movie had the potential to be cool, but it feels more like a SyFy original movie. The story wanders and never builds tension. It just sort of meanders from one plot point to another, lazily following the trail of clues until the final confrontation. And the special effects...wow. I realize this film was a lower budget than usual (compared to your average Hollywood effects-heavy film) at $20 million, but come on. I've seen some pretty amazing films created out of budgets this size. DISTRICT 9 was only $30 million and that movie blew my mind with awesomeness. Dylan DOG's got a decent independent budget and the creature effects in this film feel twenty years old! For example, the "tattooed zombie", a major element of the film that couldn't be bothered with an actual identifying name, looks ridiculous. It's mouth barely moves and it's only means of intimidation is waving it's arms around like a weekly villain from the old "Power Rangers" TV show. I love practical special effects and I prefer some real well done practical creature effects over CGI anytime. But if you can't make a creature look like anything more than a bodybuilder in a bad Halloween mask, perhaps you should consider another option.
Dylan DOG is director Kevin Munroe's second film and, seeing as how his first film was the animated TMNT, I really don't know what I should've expected. TMNT was decent, but I suppose it's not hard to look better when the preceding film in the Ninja Turtle series had men in rubber turtle costumes riding horses. I have to wonder if the effects in this film were so poor, where did the budget go? It couldn't have been the cast. The movie is filled with "Hey, I know that guy from somewhere" level actors. Brandon Routh feels as if he should be A-list by now, but his project selections aren't letting him get far. He showed us he could do comedy with some great jobs in ZACK AND MIRI and SCOTT PILGRIM, but he feels flat here. A couple of one-liners, but mostly emotionless. Sam Huntington is the best part of the film as Dog's newly zombified sidekick Marcus. He gets the best parts of the film and I think the filmmakers realized this because he gets more screen-time than his character probably should. Peter Stormare, the actor with the most clout in the film, is wasted as the head of a werewolf clan and Taye Diggs doesn't feel like he's taking this thing seriously.
If I'd known ahead of time the film had given a part to pro wrestler Kurt Angle, at least I would've known what I was walking into. No offense, wrestling fans, but wrestlers suck as actors 99% of the time and Angle is no exception here (made more laugh-worthy when they strap on the lamest werewolf makeup in the last few decades). Dylan DOG feels like a movie where no one was really trying. I'm sure it was just a paycheck to some of those involved, but this has got to annoy fans of the actual graphic novel who might've been excited to see their beloved property brought to film. Dylan DOG is yet another comic property where we just need to hope that, somewhere down the line, a studio decides to reboot the series and...I don't know...try to make an entertaining film.
