Watched in 2017
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- 140 titles
- StarsCraig QuistJohn GerberSteve ShapiroAdventures of Donkey Ollie are 13 children programs which follow the loving Donkey Ollie as he interacts with children and animals through the bible lands.What better way to start the year than watch the absolute worst thing ever created. 1/10
- DirectorsNoboru IshiguroAkio SakaiStarsRyô HorikawaKei TomiyamaMasashi HironakaTwo interstellar armies continue their 150-year-long war. On both sides, mid-ranking soldiers question the judgment of their superior officers and worry about the future.110 episodes is a bit too much for me, I'll settle for the movie. 8/10
- DirectorYaron ZilbermanStarsPhilip Seymour HoffmanChristopher WalkenCatherine KeenerMembers of a world-renowned string quartet struggle to stay together in the face of death, competing egos, and insuppressible lust.Where did the director disappear after this debut? He needs to make more films. 8/10
- DirectorKen LoachStarsDave JohnsHayley SquiresSharon PercyAfter surviving a heart-attack, a 59-year-old carpenter must fight bureaucratic forces to receive Employment and Support Allowance.Preachy and dumbed-down to the point that it looses almost all of the effect it goes for or could have had. 4/10
- CreatorsMark FrostDavid LynchStarsKyle MacLachlanMichael OntkeanMädchen AmickAn idiosyncratic FBI agent investigates the murder of a young woman in the even more idiosyncratic town of Twin Peaks.Re-watch. Simply the best. 10/10
- CreatorHiroyuki ImaishiStarsAmber Lee ConnorsBrittney KarbowskiMao IchimichiA normal girl and an alien meet and spark an interstellar romance.Transforming teenagers into guns is an odd form of child labour. 8/10
- DirectorThomas VinterbergStarsFares FaresTrine DyrholmUlrich ThomsenA story about the clash between personal desires, solidarity and tolerance in a Danish commune in the 1970s.An enjoyable drama carried by great performances but ruined by completely non-sensical character development. 6/10
- DirectorKihachi OkamotoStarsTatsuya NakadaiEtsushi TakahashiYuriko HoshiTwo ronin - an ex-samurai and an ex-farmer - get caught up in a local official's complex game of murder and betrayal.Great samurai comedy. The chicken's survival story was truly inspiring. 8/10
- DirectorDenis VilleneuveStarsAmy AdamsJeremy RennerForest WhitakerLinguist Louise Banks leads a team of investigators when gigantic spaceships touch down around the world. As nations teeter on the verge of global war, Banks and her crew must find a way to communicate with the extraterrestrial visitors.Villeneuve came dangerously close to pulling an Interstellar here, but he actually managed to sell the nonsense quite well. 8/10
- DirectorGrímur HákonarsonStarsSigurður SigurjónssonTheodór JúlíussonCharlotte BøvingIn a remote Icelandic farming valley, two brothers who haven't spoken in 40 years have to come together in order to save what's dearest to them - their sheep.A man's bond with his sheep is stronger than anything. 9/10
- DirectorYô YoshinariStarsMegumi HanFumiko OrikasaMichiyo MuraseInspired by a magician named Shiny Chariot, the lively Akko Kagari enters the Little Witch Academy with the dream of one day becoming as cool and great as her idol.Magical girls doing magical stuff. 9/10
- DirectorYô YoshinariStarsMegumi HanFumiko OrikasaMichiyo MuraseWhen Akko and other troubled students at Luna Nova are assigned to manage the annual witch hunt parade, Akko wants to make the event more positive.More magical girls doing more magical stuff. 9/10
- DirectorDavid LynchStarsSheryl LeeRay WiseMädchen AmickLaura Palmer's harrowing final days are chronicled one year after the murder of Teresa Banks, a resident of Twin Peaks' neighboring town.The negative press that this prequel has garnered is a joke. 9/10
- DirectorShinji SômaiStarsTomokazu MiuraYuichi MikamiShigeru BenibayashiThe movie takes place in the five-day period before, during and after a ferocious, seemingly liberating typhoon, which several students endure while marooned in their school gymnasium.A bunch of confused and demented high school kids kill time and torment each other in a film that feels frustratingly dull but at the same time oddly compelling. 7/10
- DirectorTom FordStarsAmy AdamsJake GyllenhaalMichael ShannonA wealthy art gallery owner is haunted by her ex-husband's novel, a violent thriller she interprets as a symbolic revenge tale.A rare imaginative revenge movie. 9/10
- DirectorSunao KatabuchiStarsNonAva PickardKenna PickardA spirited 18-year-old woman is married off to a man she barely knows as she combats the daily struggles of living in Hiroshima during World War II.Helsinki Cine Aasia: In my opinion, the greatest animated film since Mind Game in 2004. 10/10
- DirectorKôji FukadaStarsTadanobu AsanoMariko TsutsuiTaiga NakanoToshio hires Yasaka in his workshop. This old acquaintance, who has just been released from prison, begins to meddle in Toshio's family life.Helsinki Cine Aasia: When will movie families learn to not let strangers into their houses? Come on. 10/10
- DirectorGianfranco RosiStarsSamuele PucilloMattias CucinaSamuele CaruanaCapturing life on the Italian island of Lampedusa, a frontline in the European migrant crisis.Another example of a mediocre at best film getting unwarranted praise from the oh-so progressive film critic community due to the idealogical leanings it represents. Fire at Sea could have been an interesting documentary had it focused solely on the sea aspect and the journey of the refugees, portraying it in greater detail and from several different points of view. However, the director decided to dedicate the majority of the documentary's length to filming the forgettable, dull lives of a handful of Italians, while at the same time purposefully omitting any mention of the effects that the refugee crisis may have on the locals' lives.
Forcing the viewer to, for example, watch an old lady make spaghetti, an elderly couple drink tea and a young boy row a boat around for one and a half hours before ending the documentary with images of convulsing, dehydrated people and piles of human bodies is nothing but cheap trickery that any viewer with half a brain can see through, and ultimately makes for an incredibly tiresome experience. 4/10 - DirectorsYoshimitsu BannoIshirô HondaStarsAkira YamanouchiToshie KimuraHiroyuki KawaseA toxic, ever-evolving alien life-form from the Dark Gaseous Nebula arrives to consume rampant pollution, and neither Humanity nor Godzilla may be able to stop it.Child actors should be banned from Godzilla movies. Drunken jet pack Godzilla is the worst. 4/10
- DirectorDaisuke GotôStarsHôryû NakamuraRyôko AsagiYumeka SasakiA young widow, Noriko, lives with her senile father-in-law, Shukichi, on a farm. He believes his favorite cow, long gone, is still alive. Noriko pretends to be the cow and lets him milk her - a satisfying arrangement for them both.What am I doing with my life? 2/10
- DirectorHiroyuki ImaishiStarsKappei YamaguchiTakako HondaYûko MizutaniTwo aliens awaken on Earth with no recollection of their past and embark on a devastating crime spree but are sent to an infamous lunar penitentiary named Dead Leaves.Over the top action doesn't get any more over the top than what is on display here. 9/10
- DirectorKunio KatôStarMasami NagasawaTo save his house from rising flood waters, an old man uses bricks to build it higher, then he relives events from his past while searching for his dropped pipe.Re-watch for the fifth time. The feels cannot be contained. 10/10
- DirectorTsutomu MizushimaStarsMai FuchigamiAi KayanoMami OzakiOoari girls academy faces closer once again and the Tankery club girls must participate in another match to save their school from permanent closure!Top-quality panzer action. 8/10
- DirectorsKazuki ÔmoriKôji HashimotoKenjirô OhmoriStarsKunihiko MitamuraYoshiko TanakaMasanobu TakashimaDesolate by the loss of his daughter, a geneticist creates a monstrous new mutation.Also known as Godzilla vs. acid-spitting vagina monster. 8/10
- DirectorMasahiro AndôStarsRumi OkuboKôki UchiyamaHaruka TakahashiThe story takes place within Neo Tokyo in the year 2025, five years after a severe terrorist attack at the 2020 Tokyo Olympics. Students possessing special abilities are forced into serving an elite anti-terrorist unit created by the United Nations, fighting against threats including other ability users. If these agents fail their mission, they will be killed along with their families, who have bombs planted within their heads. One member of this covert ops unit, a Swedish girl by the name of Anthea Kallenberg, seeks to find who she really is.Graphic violence and school kids that have psychic powers and military-grade weaponry. Would make for a pretty entertaining tv series. 7/10
