. . . to one of the most problematic conundrums of this Our Modern 21st Century. What do you do with a piano--particularly those of the so-called "grand" variety--when some elderly would-be Chopin who has not touched it or even had it tuned for decades eventually passes on to the Eternal Choir Practice? MUSICAL MOMENTS FROM CHOPIN suggests calling in the fire brigade. Given that most people find it difficult to lug a piano out to a dumpster, or even find Four Guys & a Van willing to tackle this task, burning such a musical ebony elephant under carefully controlled conditions probably will cause less damage to a dwelling than attacking a Steinway with battle axes and sledge hammers. It certainly does the trick for Woody and Andy in terms of clearing a barn of anachronistic keyboard instruments featuring now illegal ivory. Their unsolicited flame brigade makes short work of a pair of overweight instruments.