Promising more of what Piranha brought you, this delivers less. A lot less. Less humor, less gore, less tension, less nudity, less edginess. Overall, it's just like one of those rip-off movies that comes out for rental right before a major movie comes out on disc. Maybe not a good example, but when Tom Cruise's War of the Worlds was due to be released, you saw knockoffs like "War Between Worlds". Those movies are drudgery to get through. It's cheap to have actors recite lines for 85 of the 90 minutes of a movie, and build a plot based upon that; but that's a different genre. When it's done and marketed as a comedy or horror, then that's a cheap rip-off. Dialog is cheap. Good, funny dialog (good writers and actors), and SFX are not cheap.
Just like a knockoff, this movie tries to be funny and fails. It tries to make you care (big mistake for comedy-horror), and really falls flat on it's face with bits of drama that are tedious to get through. Special FX are blown away by Sci-fi channel direct to disc releases. The original's SFX were not state-of-the-art all the time (most scenes were though, especially where there's gore), this one the SFX are not even TV-show decent. This would have been forgivable if the movie wasn't so boring in between those few shots. Overall, this is a boring, PG-13 movie that fails in every genre. It's not even so bad that it's funny (I watch some very low-grade B-Movies too). It's better than Thankskilling, but at least TK hit it's intended low mark of humor and quality. I'd put this movie in the same league as Black Swarm or Blood Monkey.
The only reason someone would see this is because of the titular link to the fantastically better movie, or because there's bodacious boobies on the box. Renting this and expecting either of these components to be there even in high dilution will surely disappoint you. If you can catch it for free via streaming when you need a nap, well then it would be good for that.
