How anybody can even consider this above two stars is mind-blowing, let alone a full ten. I don't even know where to start. Emmeline and Richard, cousins (I think?), become lost on a tropical island after something strange involving fire happens to their ship (this is never really made clear).
Along with them is the ship's robust old cook, Paddy. Paddy's character is not really clear, but he sort of just conforms to what the script calls for at any time. He is a father-figure, a raging drunk, a pervert (he chases the young Emmeline and Richard down the beach telling them to take their clothes off), and an architect all in one. But, tragically, Paddy dies of something-or-other involving a barrel and a spider and another island and some unfortunate sleep-walking, and the kids are left to fend for themselves in a wilderness suspiciously devoid of any wildlife besides mangoes.
Of course, our young protagonists do a bang-bang job of surviving after the loss of their dear Paddy. They manage to build a three-story, weather proof house, complete with numerous front porches. Richard hunts for fruit and Emmeline twiddles her thumbs as she waits for puberty. Perhaps she does the housework, though one can't really be sure.
They spend their free time swimming nude in the ocean and, lo and behold, grow into lustful teenagers; Richard a strapping young lad of unnaturally large biceps, and Emmeline a beautiful, scantily-clad young woman. Emmeline, somehow, without the conveniences of modern bathrooms, manages to maintain meticulously-groomed fingernails and silky-smooth legs. Her hair, however, remains thoroughly uncombed. As Emmeline and Richard grow, they find that they are having "funny" feelings for each other. The budding teenagers can't explain their feelings, and neither, really, can the audience. Emmeline, in some of the worst imitations of teenager flirting ever recorded in America, tells Richard that she's been having weird feelings for him. But, bashfully, she tells him that they are just feelings, and don't mean anything.
Richard is having similar feelings for Emmeline, but refuses to admit it and, instead, hurls into unexplainable fits of adolescent rage, throwing things and yelling and even managing both at the same time. Here's where the real comedy comes in. Christopher Atkins struggles mightily in the role of a socially underdeveloped 13-year-old. It is physically clear that the real Atkins is at least seventeen, and the only support that he has for his being a shipwrecked adolescent is his voice cracking.
And... on and on the movie plods. Never stopping but never really getting anywhere, either. This movie is so laughably pathetic that it's almost worth watching, just so that you can tell your friends you have seen the worst movie ever made.
Along with them is the ship's robust old cook, Paddy. Paddy's character is not really clear, but he sort of just conforms to what the script calls for at any time. He is a father-figure, a raging drunk, a pervert (he chases the young Emmeline and Richard down the beach telling them to take their clothes off), and an architect all in one. But, tragically, Paddy dies of something-or-other involving a barrel and a spider and another island and some unfortunate sleep-walking, and the kids are left to fend for themselves in a wilderness suspiciously devoid of any wildlife besides mangoes.
Of course, our young protagonists do a bang-bang job of surviving after the loss of their dear Paddy. They manage to build a three-story, weather proof house, complete with numerous front porches. Richard hunts for fruit and Emmeline twiddles her thumbs as she waits for puberty. Perhaps she does the housework, though one can't really be sure.
They spend their free time swimming nude in the ocean and, lo and behold, grow into lustful teenagers; Richard a strapping young lad of unnaturally large biceps, and Emmeline a beautiful, scantily-clad young woman. Emmeline, somehow, without the conveniences of modern bathrooms, manages to maintain meticulously-groomed fingernails and silky-smooth legs. Her hair, however, remains thoroughly uncombed. As Emmeline and Richard grow, they find that they are having "funny" feelings for each other. The budding teenagers can't explain their feelings, and neither, really, can the audience. Emmeline, in some of the worst imitations of teenager flirting ever recorded in America, tells Richard that she's been having weird feelings for him. But, bashfully, she tells him that they are just feelings, and don't mean anything.
Richard is having similar feelings for Emmeline, but refuses to admit it and, instead, hurls into unexplainable fits of adolescent rage, throwing things and yelling and even managing both at the same time. Here's where the real comedy comes in. Christopher Atkins struggles mightily in the role of a socially underdeveloped 13-year-old. It is physically clear that the real Atkins is at least seventeen, and the only support that he has for his being a shipwrecked adolescent is his voice cracking.
And... on and on the movie plods. Never stopping but never really getting anywhere, either. This movie is so laughably pathetic that it's almost worth watching, just so that you can tell your friends you have seen the worst movie ever made.