3 reviews
This softcore vampire comedy is a curious case of film which balances between spoof and porn, with strong traits of both genres which do not fit each other perfectly. Anyway, outcome is a moderately bad film, and certainly not a catastrophe. The first scene in Transylvania is nice. Indeed, the vampire couple (in spite of their too contemporary niceties for centuries-old creatures) and the full-of-exaggerated-mannerisms blondie Jane are not bad characters, and their actors do not go worse than what we find in regular English-language B-films. Other characters, such as her mullet-haired husband, the crossbow vampire-hunter, and the envious secretary are less convincing, even comparatively. The excuses for sex scenes are mostly too poor (all but those involving vampires, who do have special powers, and obviously those with established couples). Those sex scenes (which do not reach a hardcore level) are also very long - and, believe me or not, they are on average less interesting than the story! Music score, at least in most sex scenes (almost all main characters have sex with each other!), is that crap-quality porn-stereotype instrumental one. To resume, there is too much (and not bad) story for a porn film, and too much sex (mostly not very good and a little tiring) for a spoof vampire comedy.
Trying to remain inconspicuous, a vampire and his bride arrive in a secondary household in Beverly Hills where they catch the attention of a housewife who brings a vampire slayer over to battle them as they begin feeding on the locals.
This one here really turned out to be quite the enjoyable offering. The biggest thing going for this one here is that it manages to keep the story going along for the majority of time here, which does shorten the overall quantity of sexual scenes but does enable this a much more cohesive and logical storyline. There's not only the gradual reveal of the next-door neighbors and their weird antics which certainly spell out vampires here yet by keeping it all under wraps by turning it into the wife's paranoia and delusions, it manages to make scenes like their night-time arrival but disappearance during the day, leaving the lights on in an abandoned property and them breaking into the house where they find the true evidence of their identities which really provides this with some really fun times as it tends to skip over the sexual encounters in order to build this strong story that allows for those to become part of the film itself. Due to the incredibly strong range of performers here, this one comes off rather nicely in that regard here by really offering plenty of attractive women in fine scenes throughout here, from the opening scene in the castle that lets on about their true vampire nature to the audience where they hump throughout the area before the big bite at the end, a later scene where the wife and hunter get involved in a steamy lesbian scene to kill time in the storyline and a rather fun encounter in the bathroom where the secretary gets turned makes for some pretty rousing times here. Still, the three-way lesbian sequence where she ends up corrupting the two of them in the lair crypt that features all of the usual groping and fondling between each other before the absolutely fun and unexpected biting that comes out of nowhere is a wholly stand-out sequence as well that lets everyone get a chance to shine. The other positive point here with all of these fun scenes is the fact that there's a really fun sense of cheese present, from the goofy quips and the attitude of everyone here to ignore everything else here from the oblivious lawyer and the fact that the hunter appears in the bar with her crossbow armed and loaded while no one cases is what comes off so funny. These here are the film's positives that help this against the film's negatives. The biggest issue here is the fact that the film does have some pacing problems with how many actual sexual encounters in the middle segment do occur, as the storyline machinations keep them on hold. All that really occurs here is the lesbian encounter which does keep this one give this one a really slowed-down sense of sensuality in there. It also ties into the film's other big problem here in that the male vampire is a completely unimpressive performer who doesn't actually do much in his scenes with others as he lets them do all the work instead, leading to vigorous female work while he just does nothing, leaving an unpleasant taste. Beyond this, there's not much else wrong here.
Rated Unrated/NC-17: Continuous Full Nudity, strong continuous sexual content and Violence.
This one here really turned out to be quite the enjoyable offering. The biggest thing going for this one here is that it manages to keep the story going along for the majority of time here, which does shorten the overall quantity of sexual scenes but does enable this a much more cohesive and logical storyline. There's not only the gradual reveal of the next-door neighbors and their weird antics which certainly spell out vampires here yet by keeping it all under wraps by turning it into the wife's paranoia and delusions, it manages to make scenes like their night-time arrival but disappearance during the day, leaving the lights on in an abandoned property and them breaking into the house where they find the true evidence of their identities which really provides this with some really fun times as it tends to skip over the sexual encounters in order to build this strong story that allows for those to become part of the film itself. Due to the incredibly strong range of performers here, this one comes off rather nicely in that regard here by really offering plenty of attractive women in fine scenes throughout here, from the opening scene in the castle that lets on about their true vampire nature to the audience where they hump throughout the area before the big bite at the end, a later scene where the wife and hunter get involved in a steamy lesbian scene to kill time in the storyline and a rather fun encounter in the bathroom where the secretary gets turned makes for some pretty rousing times here. Still, the three-way lesbian sequence where she ends up corrupting the two of them in the lair crypt that features all of the usual groping and fondling between each other before the absolutely fun and unexpected biting that comes out of nowhere is a wholly stand-out sequence as well that lets everyone get a chance to shine. The other positive point here with all of these fun scenes is the fact that there's a really fun sense of cheese present, from the goofy quips and the attitude of everyone here to ignore everything else here from the oblivious lawyer and the fact that the hunter appears in the bar with her crossbow armed and loaded while no one cases is what comes off so funny. These here are the film's positives that help this against the film's negatives. The biggest issue here is the fact that the film does have some pacing problems with how many actual sexual encounters in the middle segment do occur, as the storyline machinations keep them on hold. All that really occurs here is the lesbian encounter which does keep this one give this one a really slowed-down sense of sensuality in there. It also ties into the film's other big problem here in that the male vampire is a completely unimpressive performer who doesn't actually do much in his scenes with others as he lets them do all the work instead, leading to vigorous female work while he just does nothing, leaving an unpleasant taste. Beyond this, there's not much else wrong here.
Rated Unrated/NC-17: Continuous Full Nudity, strong continuous sexual content and Violence.
- kannibalcorpsegrinder
- Dec 6, 2015
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