- Johnny Carson: Is this an offer you're making? Publicly?
- Charles Grodin: We'll see.
- Johnny Carson: To appear in your picture?
- Charles Grodin: Matter of what kind of money are we talking about?
- Johnny Carson: Big. Big. Big money.
- Ed McMahon: Mega. Mega-bucks.
- Johnny Carson: Mega-bucks. Lots of - lots of bread.
- Charles Grodin: For one day?
- Johnny Carson: You got it. And I'd like the money in cash, in the parking lot... for reason - for reasons that are my own.
- Big Steve Wurbler: In high jumping, you stand in a low place, and you see how high up you can jump. In low jumping, you stand on a high place, and see how far down you can jump.
- Biff Burns: Oh... You and I both know the answer to this next question, but for the, uh, sake of the viewers looking in who may not, would you care to comment on the whole thing?
- Big Steve Wurbler: Well, uh, it's pretty basic. Uh, actually, I might point out here, though, that if you jump from a high place and you get killed, that jump does not count.