- Muggs: [watching a parade of troops march by] Okay, boys, we've seen enough. Come on.
- Danny Connors: Why? Where're we going?
- Muggs: We're gonna clean up on some Japs.
- Officer 'Pops' Stevens: [ready to let the boys go but pointing to the vegetables stolen by Muggs] All right, only put that stuff back where you got it.
- Muggs: That's Vitamins for Victory.
- Navy Recruiter: You wanna join the Navy? What for?
- Glimpy: We wanna share the ocean with Japan.
- Navy Recruiter: You wanna do *what*?
- Glimpy: We wanna share the ocean with Japan.
- Navy Recruiter: What do you mean "with Japan?"
- Glimpy: We'll take the top and give them the bottom.
- Muggs: Somethin' smells.
- Danny Connors: Yeah, and it ain't cherry blossoms.
- Muggs: Whatever it is, we're gonna find out.
- Scruno: You're sorta J.G., huh? Junior G-Men?
- Danny Connors: Hey, now there's an idea. They won't let us enlist, so maybe we can help out like that.
- Muggs: Good morning, Matsui. How's your health?
- Mr. Matsui - Joe's Father: Very good. I trust that your honorable health is excellent, young man.
- Muggs: My health is slowly depreciatin' and I'm very dishonorable, but I want to thank my venerable forefathers that I'm able and well to walk into your worthy tea shop on this sunny day.
- Recruiting Officer: You'll have to have proof of your age.
- Muggs: Proof? Feel these bristles.
- [rubs his chin on the back of the officer's hand]
- Muggs: And I just shaved this mornin', too.
- Tojo - Joe's Assistant: You're a very brave young fellow with all your friends here.
- Danny Connors: Yeah, go ahead. Step outside, fellas. I wanna take care of this.
- Tojo - Joe's Assistant: Oh, no. I don't a wanna fight.
- Muggs: Naw, not unless you've got ten to one on your side.
- Glimpy: You talk like you was a General MacArthur.
- Scruno: Bataan or Japan, that General will fight 'em to a stand still.
- Danny Connors: Yeah, you're not kidding, so long as he's got help.
- Muggs: He'll have plenty of help because we're joinin' the army.
- Muggs: The Japs don't ask you how old you are when they start droppin' those bombs on ya.
- Recruiting Officer: Orders is orders. Tell that to the Marines.
- [last lines]
- Muggs: Awe, don't feel bad. We'll take you on your honeymoon. Come on, let's go! See you in Tokyo, Pops!
- Glimpy: [after his mother throws them out for catching her stove on fire] Now look, fellas, don't mind my mother. She gets nervous over nuttin'.
- Muggs: [to Scruno, the only dark-skinned member of the gang] Just cuz YOU can't tell a little white lie is no reason why the rest of us can't.
- Glimpy: Professor?
- Music Master: Yeah.
- Glimpy: Should I change my name to Misha?
- Danny Connors: We wouldn't misha if ya did.
- Music Master: Who said that?
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