- Patience Hawley: [to the awaiting bridegrooms] You can look us over, but don't think you're going to do the choosing! All the way from Independence, I've been staring at two things: one was this picture and the other was the rump of a mule... and don't ask me which was prettier!
- Buck Wyatt: [to Patience, as she sits with the unconscious Mrs. Maroni] Talk to her, Patience.
- Patience Hawley: Thanks... what'll I use for language?
- Fifi Danon: [to Buck Wyatt] Do you ever... shave?
- [he walks away from her]
- Fifi Danon: You always look so dirty!