Are You Being Served? (1972–1985)
Mollie Sugden: Mrs. Slocombe
Photos
Quotes
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Mrs. Slocombe : [removes her gas mask] What about this fog! My pussy's been gasping all night.
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[Captain Peacock beckons to Mrs Slocombe]
Mrs. Slocombe : Captain Peacock, I do not respond to any man's finger.
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[repeated line]
Mrs. Slocombe : ...and I am unanimous in this!
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Mrs. Slocombe : You know, I always keep a couple of pound notes tucked away in me knickers, just for emergencies. Unfortunately, last week, I had an emergency.
Mr. Humphries : Ooh, what happened?
Mrs. Slocombe : The elastic broke and I dropped one in the Haymarket and it blew off down the street. Two seconds later, the other one followed it.
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Mrs. Slocombe : [into phone] Yes.
[pause]
Mrs. Slocombe : Yes.
[pause]
Mrs. Slocombe : I will.
[hangs up phone]
Mrs. Slocombe : Captain Peacock?
Captain Peacock : Yes?
Mrs. Slocombe : Apparently Miss Belfridge is in one of the fitting rooms, and Mr. Rumbold requires her in his office.
Miss Brahms : She must have got in early!
Mrs. Slocombe : She's no right to be there without my permission.
Captain Peacock : Or mine. Get her out of there, Miss Brahms, I shall speak to her most severely about this.
Miss Brahms : [walks to fitting room] Here! Captain Peacock wants you out here, at the double.
Miss Belfridge : [walks out in outfit that is barely more than a bra and pantyhose, with Captain Peacock's eyes glued to her bust] You wanted to see me, Stephen?
Captain Peacock : You should really ask for my permission to be on the floor, but I'll overlook it this time.
Mrs. Slocombe : It's the only thing he has overlooked.
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Mrs. Slocombe : [Mr. Humphries has just been sacked for being a "troublemaker"] I can't believe this is our last morning coffee together!
Miss Brahms : Coffee? I thought this was tea.
Mr. Bert Spooner : No, the tea's the one with the froth on top.
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Mrs. Slocombe : Captain Peacock! Captain Peacock!
Captain Peacock : Mrs. Slocombe, you will return to your post. When I turn around, you will raise your arm. I will ask, "What is, Mrs. Slocombe?" You will ask me, "Are you free?" If I nod, you may then approach me.
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Mrs. Slocombe : Are you free, Captain Peacock?
Captain Peacock : [looks about him] At the moment.