Telly Savalas credited as playing...
Albain
- Robert Caulfield: Mr Albaine, how much do you charge to dust a field?
- Albain: Twenty five dollars.
- Robert Caulfield: I'd like to hire your plane.
- Albain: That'll be a hundred dollars.
- Robert Caulfield: You said you charged twenty five?
- Albain: Twenty five dollars to dust a field, but you ain't got no field because you ain't no farmer, which means you ain't poor and I think you're a pervert!
- Robert Caulfield: Okay, one hundred.
- Albain: One hundred and twenty five.
- Robert Caulfield: What?
- Albain: Because you said yes to a hundred too quick, which means you can afford a hundred and twenty five.
- Robert Caulfield: You in charge here?
- Albain: See that sign there?
- Robert Caulfield: Yes.
- Albain: Well, read it.
- Robert Caulfield: I did.
- Albain: Out loud.
- Robert Caulfield: A&A Crop Dusting Service.
- Albain: You wanna know who I am?
- Robert Caulfield: I bet you're one of the A's.
- Albain: But which one? I bet you can't answer that question, smartass.
- Robert Caulfield: The first one.
- Albain: Wrong.
- Robert Caulfield: Can I have one more guess?
- Albain: You got it.
- Robert Caulfield: The second one.
- Albain: Wrong. I'm both of them. My name is AlBaine. Now, I got a son. You know, the other A was for him but he don't like to fly. He became a lawyer. I think he's a pervert so I took the A away from him. You want to speak to someone in charge, you're speaking to the both of them.
- Robert Caulfield: My name is Caulfield.
- Albain: Hey, I can't help that.
- Albain: Now what the hell is your friend doing here?
- Robert Caulfield: He's lost.
- Albain: He robbed a bank or something?
- Robert Caulfield: No.
- Albain: Well, I get a third.
- Robert Caulfield: What?
- Albain: We find him, I get a third of the loot. Now keep your goddamn head down.