The infamous Zodiac killer went on record in 1973 in a letter to the San Francisco Police Department where he/she/it stated that "The Exorcist is one of the funniest satirical comedies ever made." I wonder what they would have thought of NAKED EXORCISM, an Italian made clone that stars Eddie Munster as a troubled young man with latent designs on his MILFish hottie mom, a taste for pretty young nuns with nice perky breasts and a penchants for wandering around the house naked.
Made by two directors nobody has ever heard of before and culling many of THE EXORCIST's most infamous moments for effect, the film has retained the ability to amuse for decades beyond the time when William Freidkn's movie lost most of it's ability to shock. Eddie Munster finds an ancient amulet while out wandering through the woods one day with his camera taking pictures of Euro Horror Sex Sluts that aren't really there, and slowly starts to fall under the influence of an ancient Pagan Sex Cult that practiced satanism back in the 15th or 16th century. We see glimpses of their orgies in historical flashbacks that include images of human sacrifice, lesbian sex and idol worship, and wonder where Rob Lowe is in the picture.
Is he crazy or is he possessed? the film wants us to ask ourselves, and then goes out of it's way to show us that Eddie's new fondness for barking out vile obscenities to those who love him is in fact demonic in nature. Meanwhile his attractive late 30/early 40-something mom is starting to wear more revealing nightgowns, the Euro Horror Sex Slut starts to appear nude in Eddie's bedroom, and a hot young nun with a fantastic rack moves into the house to try and curb his growing fondness for wandering around the house naked, either in his own form or that of the nude female succubus which has possessed him. This leads to various sadisto-erotic lesbian encounters with both the nun and mommy, assorted deaths and eventually Eddie is tied to his bed and an Exorcist is called in.
He is played by Richard Conte, a fixture on Italian genre cinema at the time, most notably appearances in Italian Police/Crime thrillers like MILAN CALIBRE NINE, and it is amusing to note that he plays more or less the same character albeit armed with a priest's frock & a bible instead of a small machine gun. The scene where Conte arrives at the airport and ominously stalks into Eddie's house reminded me of a Spaghetti Western when the professional hired gun strolls into town to confront the wicked and dispense justice, but then again I have been on a Spaghetti Western kick and may just be projecting. The main difference is that the bad guys in Westerns never hurl dressers and chairs at their opponents while rocking about in a bed, spewing liquefied cranberry sauce from special effects hoses and made up to look like Marilyn Manson. Eventually the young nun goes all Jason Miller on the succubus, offering herself instead of Eddie for eternal damnation, and with a rack like hers you can't blame the harlot from Hell for taking her up on the offer.
The bottom line here is that demonic possession movies are absurd in the first place, and once you get down to the brass tacks this one is no better or worse than any of the others. If anything you have to admire the Italians who made this for being honest about their intentions to make a skin flick disguised as a horror film rather than allow the polymorphously perverse nature of the genre formula to exist merely as suggestive, shadowy Freudian references involving little girls ... eww. If you can suspend your disbelief and watch the movie drunk it's actually kind of a hoot, with ample nudity, some interesting gore sequences, perverse sexual juxtapositions and a groovy little musical score.
But if you go into this expecting something profound, shocking or revelation-inducing you are wasting your time. This is a horror movie not a documentary on global warming, you don't have to take it seriously and you are allowed to let it turn you on. It is garbage, trash, and knows that about itself. I found the honesty and self-awareness to be quite refreshing, and wonder when it was that nuns stopped being so hot.
4/10
