Mark Blankfield credited as playing...
Blinkin
- Robin Hood: As my first order of business, I would like to appoint a new Sheriff... my friend Ahchoo.
- Crowd: A black sheriff?
- Blinkin: He's black?
- Ahchoo: And why not? It worked in Blazing Saddles.
- Robin Hood: Blinkin, listen to me. They've taken the castle!
- Blinkin: I thought it felt a bit drafty. Cor, this never would have happened if your father was alive.
- Robin Hood: He's dead?
- Blinkin: Yes...
- Robin Hood: And my mother?
- Blinkin: She died of pneumonia while...
- [Remembers]
- Blinkin: Oh, you were away!
- Robin Hood: My brothers?
- Blinkin: There were all killed by the plague.
- Robin Hood: My dog, Pongo?
- Blinkin: Run over by a carriage.
- Robin Hood: My goldfish, Goldie?
- Blinkin: Eaten by the cat.
- Robin Hood: [on the verge of tears] My cat?
- Blinkin: Choked on the goldfish.
- [pause]
- Blinkin: Oh, it's good to be home, ain't it, Master Robin?
- Robin Hood: Blinkin, I'd like you to meet Ahchoo.
- Blinkin: A Jew? Here?
- Robin Hood: No no, not a Jew. Ahchoo.
- Blinkin: Oh Master Robin!
- [hugging a replica statue of the Venus de Milo]
- Blinkin: You lost your arms in battle! But you grew some nice boobs.
- Robin Hood: Blinkin, I'm over here.
- [Blinkin, the blind man, is up in a perch looking out for strangers]
- Robin Hood: Blinkin! What are you doing?
- Blinkin: Guessing. I guess no one's coming.
- Ahchoo: [after Blinkin catches an arrow] Blinkin! How did you do that?
- Blinkin: I heard that coming a mile away.
- Robin Hood: Right-o, Blinkin, very good.
- Blinkin: Pardon? Who's talking?
- King Richard: [taking Prince John's crown] You are no longer worthy to wear this sacred symbol of authority.
- Prince John: Oh, please have mercy on me, brother. It wasn't my fault. I got some really bad advice from Rottingham.
- Blinkin, Ahchoo, Scarlet, Little John, Crowd: [coughs] Bullshit! Bullshit!
- King Richard: Brother, you have surrounded your given name with a foul stench!
- [to the crowd]
- King Richard: From this day forth, all the toilets in the kingdom shall be known as... Johns!
- [the crowd cheering]
- Prince John: [yelling] NO!
- King Richard: Take him away!
- [the Merry Men began to grabbing Prince John]
- Prince John: No, wait, wait!
- King Richard: Put him in the Tower of London! Make him part of the tour.
- Rabbi Tuckman: I am Rabbi Tuckman, purveyor of sacramental wine and moyel extraordinaire.
- Merry Men: 'ello Rabbi!
- Rabbi Tuckman: Hello boys!
- Robin Hood: A moyel. I don't believe I've ever heard of that profession.
- Rabbi Tuckman: A moyel is a very important guy. He makes circumcisions.
- Scarlet: What, pray tell, sir, is a circumcision?
- Rabbi Tuckman: It's the latest craze. The ladies love it!
- Little John: I'll take one!
- Ahchoo: Hey, put me down for two!
- Robin Hood: I'm game. How's it done?
- Rabbi Tuckman: It's a snap.
- [demonstrates with a carrot and a miniature guillotine]
- Rabbi Tuckman: I take my machine here, I take your little thing, I put it through this hole, and then...
- [releases the blade, cutting the end off the carrot]
- Rabbi Tuckman: I nip the tip! Who's first?
- [groans from the Merry Men]
- Little John: I changed me mind!
- Ahchoo: I forgot, I already got one.
- Blinkin: [puts his hand in the air] Question...
- [Ahchoo pulls his arm down silencing him]
- Rabbi Tuckman: I gotta start working with a younger crowd.
- Robin Hood: [first meeting Blinkin the blind servant] BLINKIN!
- Blinkin: Master Robin, Is that you?
- Robin Hood: Yes.
- Blinkin: What back from the Crusades?
- Robin Hood: Yes.
- Blinkin: And alive?
- Robin Hood: [pause] yes.
- Blinkin: [as Robin fights one of Prince John's knights, Blinkin approaches with a tray of water; Robin doesn't look at the knight and takes a drink] It sounds like we're winning, sire.
- Robin Hood: [Finishing his drink] Yes. Very good, Blinkin. Carry on.
- [Villagers begin throwing food at the archery contest]
- Blinkin: Oh good, they've opened the salad bar.