Debrah Farentino credited as playing...
Princess Yasmin
- Princess Yasmin: Do you like being a cop?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes, sometimes. How is it being a princess?
- Princess Yasmin: It's not much fun.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh. Fun is important.
- Princess Yasmin: Yes. What else is important to you?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Singing.
- Princess Yasmin: Yes?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [sings]
- Princess Yasmin: That's... terrible.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes. And poetry. "Parent of golden dreams, Romance! Auspicious queen of childish joys who lead'st along in airy dance."
- Princess Yasmin: That's Byron.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes. Yes. And rain, and sleeping. And and and my mother.
- Princess Yasmin: You like your mother?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes, very much, yes. And women.
- Princess Yasmin: What kinds of women?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: All kinds. Especially dark women with blue eyes and full red lips who smell like night-blooming jasmine, and taste like a warm mango.
- Princess Yasmin: Warm mango?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: And honey.
- Princess Yasmin: Oh, my god.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Mine, too.
- King Haroak: [King Haroak and Princess Yasmin are riding in a limousine; Yasmin lights a cigarette and starts to smoke it] Oh... I wish you wouldn't smoke.
- King Haroak: We should never have sent you to America, you picked up such appalling habits there.
- Princess Yasmin: And nobody smokes in Lugash.
- King Haroak: That's different.
- Princess Yasmin: Hmm... of course... and there's nothing wrong with America, Father. My mother was American, you married her.
- King Haroak: Your mother never smoked.
- Princess Yasmin: Well, I'm surprised you noticed. You know, she wasn't dead three weeks before you married that... woman.
- King Haroak: Well, you will no doubt be pleased to know that I am about to pay the price for that folly.
- Princess Yasmin: Then, the rumor is true?
- King Haroak: Yes, it would seem so, but Yasmin, please keep it to yourself. I don''t want to alert your stepmother until I have proof.
- King Haroak: [at a Monaco casino, after Yasmin has just won a game of baccarat] Praise Allah someone in this family is lucky.
- Princess Yasmin: Hmm.
- [Yasmin gets out of her seat and leaves the baccarat table]
- Princess Yasmin: [to Hans] Cash this in.
- Hans Zarba: How do you know I can be trusted?
- Princess Yasmin: [Yasmin slaps Hans, then she puts her glasses on] Oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were one of my bodyguards, it's all right. Uh, what's the going rate on a slap these days?
- Princess Yasmin: [Hans holds up a casino chip] You're cheap.
- [Hans tosses the chip to the baccarat dealer, who responds "Merci, monsieur."]
- Hans Zarba: Please, my sister may be dying.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Okay.
- [Gambrelli walks over to the back of Hans's van]
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Uh, please, please, stand back, stand back. Haa!
- [Gambrelli opens the door, hitting Dreyfus in the face, and a machine gun falls to the ground]
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Gambrelli picks up the machine gun] You've been hunting?
- Hans Zarba: Yes, hunting... hunting. Very perceptive.
- Princess Yasmin: [Gambrelli kneels to check Hans's "sister", unaware that she is really Princess Yasmin; romantic music plays in the background as he takes a look at her face, she speaks softly] Hello.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [dreamily] Hello.
- Princess Yasmin: [Yasmin giggles at Jacques. and puts her finger on his nose] Who are you?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [in a slow voice] I am Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli, second class. Who are you?
- Princess Yasmin: I am -
- [Hanif looks at Hans Zarba with a suspicion that she might reveal her identity and blow their cover; she yawns and goes unconscious]
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Your sister is very... very unconscious. Yes, I suspect that she had 'receiv-ed' a 'beump' on the head.
- Hans Zarba: What?
- Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: [Dreyfus corrects Gambrelli's mispronunciation] Bump.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: What?
- Police Commisioner Charles Dreyfus: Oh, never mind. Come, François.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes, she requires immediate emergency treatment, Mister... uh...
- Hans Zarba: Jones, Jones.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Gambrellia closes the van door, getting his gloves and fingers caught in the van door] Take her quickly to the Nice hospital, Mr. Jones, and I will phone ahead to - Aah! - to tell them that you're - Mr. Jones! Mr. Jones, please stop! Mr. J - Wait, Mr. Jones, my hand! My - where are you go - Mr. Jones! Mr. Jones! Mr. Jones, Mr. Jones, please stop!
- [the van backs up and then drives away with Gambrelli's hand caught in the back door]
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Gambrelli hiccups and wakes up] Oh... ohh... Ah... ah...
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Gambrelli glances at Princess Yasmin] 'Oh... but soft, what... light through yonder window breaks? Oh, it is the east, and Juliet... is the sun."
- Princess Yasmin: [He stumbles at the foot of Yasmin's bunk; she wakes up] Romeo...
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, no,
- [Jacques hiccups]
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Jacques.
- Princess Yasmin: You know what they say.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: No.
- Princess Yasmin: Yes: "A rose by any other name would - "
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Jacques completes the line from Romeo and Juliet] "Would smell as sweet."
- Princess Yasmin: [giggles] Yes. What are you doing here, sweetie?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: I came to rescue you.
- [he hiccups]
- Princess Yasmin: Hold your breath.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Like this?
- Princess Yasmin: Mm-hmm.
- [Yasmin sniffs in some air, Jacques hiccups]
- Princess Yasmin: Longer.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: I can't.
- Princess Yasmin: Oh, here, try again.
- [Yasmin inhales with her nose, then she kisses Jacques while holding his nostrils shut]
- Princess Yasmin: Ahhh.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Jacques hiccups] It's no use.
- Princess Yasmin: Yeah. There is one other way, okay? It's a little extreme, but it always works.
- [Yasmin kisses Jacques and embraces him lovingly]
- Princess Yasmin: No more hiccups.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Amazing, but how did you discover it?
- Princess Yasmin: I was, uh, engaged to a football player when I was in college in the States, and he, uh, always had the hiccups.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, who could blame him?
- Princess Yasmin: Hmph.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: How about you?
- Princess Yasmin: I never have hiccups.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, never?
- Princess Yasmin: But if I ever do, I hope you're somewhere in the neighborhood.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, I would consider it an honor and a privilege to be of assistance.
- Princess Yasmin: How long have you been a policeman, Officer Gambrelli?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, three years next May.
- Princess Yasmin: Yes?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: How long have you been a princess, Your Highness?
- Princess Yasmin: All my life.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, that's a long time to be anything.
- Princess Yasmin: Yes.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Do you like being a cop?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Yes, sometimes. How is it being a princess?
- Princess Yasmin: It's not much fun.
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Oh, fun is important.
- Princess Yasmin: What else is important to you?
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: Mmm... singing.
- Hans Zarba: Salaam alaikum.
- Uncle Idris: Wa alaikum salaam.
- Uncle Idris: [in English] Welcome to my home away from home, your Highness.
- Princess Yasmin: Who are you?
- Uncle Idris: My Muslim name is Sharif Latiff Abdul al-Idris al-Saba, but you can call me Uncle Idris.
- Hans Zarba: [Hans enters the room carrying a gun] Come, Yasmin!
- Princess Yasmin: Never!
- Hans Zarba: We'll make our escape!
- Gendarme Jacques Gambrelli: [Jacques recites some poetry from memory] "When I am dead, my dearest, sing no sad songs for me. / Plant thou no roses at my head, no shady cypress tree / Be the green grass above me, with showers and dew drops wet, / And if thou wilt remember, and if thou wilt forget."
- [Hans shoots at Jacques]
- Princess Yasmin: Jacques!
- [Yasmin grunts as she struggles to get away from Hans; Cato, who has been hiding in am urn, hits Hans from behind with a brass frying pan]
- Hans Zarba: That's it, no more mister nice guy!
- [Hans faints to the floor]