Cyborg 3: The Recycler

STAR RATING:*****Unmissable****Very Good***Okay**You Could Go Out For A Meal Instead*Avoid At All Costs

In the future,civility between man and machine has deceased and war wages.'Recycler' Llewyllyn (Richard Lynch,coming across as a poor mans Rutger Hauer! (yikes)) and his sidekick Jocko (Andrew Bryniarski,who weirdly resembles a beefier,blanker version of Vincent Klyn from the original film) hunt cyborgs across the desert,hoping to catch them and sell their scrap parts to the highest bidder.Cyborg Cash (Khrystyne Haje,in a role originally played by a young Angelina Jolie in the previous film) is the first cyborg to become pregnant and becomes their primary target.The story also features a character called Evans (an older Zach Galligan from the Gremlins films) as one of Cash's old flames and a walk-on part (despite being headbilled on the front cover) from Malcolm 'will-work-for-food' McDowell as Lord Talon,one of Llewellyn's main buyers.

The director of the last film,Michael Schroeder,returns to helming duties here,the first in the series to feature no martial artists in the leading roles.

The,erm,shall we say,less than oscar worthy production values,screenplay and acting aside,this plotless rubbish is totally far away from the essence of the original film,which,lets face it,was quite an uninspired mess to begin with and should really say it all.It's also appropriately titled,in the way it seems to 'recycle' ideas from many other movies of much superior quality made before it.This is aside from a nauseating soundtrack which grates on the nerves throughout the film.

Worth watching only for the unimaginable hilarity of a woman giving birth to a baby in the shape of a grey tin can with wires dangling off the edge of it.*