Kelly LeBrock credited as playing...
Lauren Goodhue
- Ryan Harrison: Your dog sure has a surprised look on his face.
- Lauren: That's because you're looking at his butt.
- Ryan Harrison: Uh, then he's certainly not going to enjoy that treat I just fed to him.
- Lauren: Ryan and I were having sex. Hot steamy, sweaty sex. Every part of my body tingled orgasm after orgasm...
- Sgt. Orono: Lady, I just asked for your name.
- Lauren: Oh... Mrs. Hibbing Goodhue.
- Lauren Goodhue: I've never missed one of your concerts. Hibbing, however, wasn't at Friday's.
- Hibbing Goodhue: It was a high colonic.
- Ryan Harrison: Yes, a Jewish holiday. Mazel tov.
- Cass Lake: I'm your sister. Lauren's our mother.
- Lauren: I'm your mother's identical twin, born ten years apart but identical. I killed your mother. Penis envy. She was a hermaphrodite.
- Cass Lake: Mom was my mother *and* my father?
- Lauren: Sean's adopted. I dated your real father but chose the life of a freedom fighter.
- Ryan Harrison: [to Sean] Right? Signal "yes" by shooting yourself in the head three times.
- Lauren: Don't, it's a trick!