Stephen Baldwin: Barney Rubble
Photos
Quotes
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Fred Flintstone : Hey, was that an insult?
Gazoo : Well, if the shoe fits...
Barney Rubble : What's a shoe?
Gazoo : Than I guess it *was* an insult.
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Gazoo : I come from a planet too far for you to fathom and a civilization too advanced for you to comprehend.
Barney Rubble : Wait a minute, Fred. I'll bet we get wishes!
Gazoo : Pardon?
Barney Rubble : Yeah. We let you out of the fancy bottle and now we get wishes, right?
Fred Flintstone : Yeah, Barney's right. Let's get this started. What do we have to rub?
Gazoo : Now, look here. I am not some sort of friendly cartoon genie, and that is not a bottle. It is a spacecraft. I am of a highly evolved alien species. I don't do funny voices, I don't sing catchy songs, and I do not posess a magic carpet for your big, bloated behinds to float upon! I am here to observe your species mating rituals, OK, dum-dums?
Fred Flintstone : Dum-dums? Hey, was that an insult?
Gazoo : Well, if the shoe fits.
Barney Rubble : What's a shoe?
Gazoo : Yes, it was an insult.
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Barney Rubble : Cranes got trouble, just call Barney Rubble.
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Barney Rubble : [defending Fred to everyone after he's been accused of robbery] Wait a minute! Wait a minute! You're all making a big mistake. Fred couldn't have stolen that necklace. It was locked up in a safe. Fred can't even remember the combination to his bowling locker. Look, he's gotta write it down on his hand, see?
[lifts Fred's hand up in the air and points at where the combination is written]
Fred Flintstone : [jerks away] Aw, great. Now everybody's seen it.
Barney Rubble : Huh. Crack a safe? He couldn't even crack his knuckles without my help.
[laughs]
Chip Rockefeller : Thank you, Mr. Rubble, for confessing to being Mr. Flintstone's accomplice!
Barney Rubble : You're welcome.
[pauses and realizes]
Barney Rubble : What?
Chip Rockefeller : Take them both away!
[the officers takes Fred and Barney to jail; everybody cheers; Betty stares in horror, Roxie claps and smiles evilly]
Fred Flintstone : I'm innocent!
Chip Rockefeller : Everybody, gamble!
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[Fred and Barney, disguised as dancing girls, burst into Mick Jagged's dressing room and close the door behind them]
Betty O'Shale : [excited] Barney?
[they turn around]
Betty O'Shale : [disgusted] Fred?
Fred Flintstone : Wow, you really ARE with Mick Jagged.
Mick Jagged : [points to Fred and Barney] I hope you're not the two girls I sent for.
Betty O'Shale : No. Actually, the cuter one used to be my boyfriend.
Mick Jagged : What?
Barney Rubble : [steps forward] Betty, I understand if you want to be with this famous rock star instead of me, but I just had to come back here and tell you... I love you.
[Betty turns her head and smiles at Barney]
Barney Rubble : I don't think I ever told you that before, but now I did, so, goodbye.
[turns to leave; Betty stops him]
Betty O'Shale : Barney, wait! Do you really mean it?
Barney Rubble : Of course I do. I've never felt this way about anyone before.
Betty O'Shale : Well, then, what about that showgirl you were with in the restaurant?
Barney Rubble : Roxie? That's Chip Rockefeller's girlfriend. He sent her to take me to the buffet so I couldn't stop Fred from gambling.
Betty O'Shale : Chip Rockefeller has a girlfriend? Somebody's got to tell Wilma!
Fred Flintstone : Don't worry, Betty. I'll handle Rockefeller.
Mick Jagged : All right, all right, would somebody mind telling me what the bloody hell's going on here?
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Chip Rockefeller : Ladies and gentlemen! Ladies and gentlemen, I regret to inform you that there is a criminal in our midst...
[Everybody gasps]
Chip Rockefeller : But, before I expose him into the public. I'd like to give him a chance to step forward that admit his wrong doing only to take his first tiny step towards absolution.
Towel Confessor : [sobs] I stole all the towels in my room!
Chip Rockefeller : Well, that is illegal! But, still...
Underwear Confessor : I'm wearing someone else's underwear!
[Everybody gasps and groans]
Chip Rockefeller : No! I was talking about a...
Dinosaur Confessor : I'm systematically poisoning the dinosaurs water supply! In a matter of decades, their entire species will be extinct!
[Everybody laughs]
Chip Rockefeller : All right! This is obviously going nowhere. No, I was talking about a necklace. A very valuable necklace has been stolen from our hotel safe. A necklace belonging to my dear... dear friend, Wilma Slaghoople.
Wilma Slaghoople : My pearls?
Betty O'Shale : Wilma!
Fred Flintstone : All right, who did it? So, help me. If you don't step forward right now, I'll personally punch you in the...
Chip Rockefeller : I don't think violence would be necessary, Flintstone. Because, I know exactly, who stole Wilma's pearls... A desperate man drowning and gambling debts.
Fred Flintstone : Low-life!
Dinosaur Confessor : Hey! Doesn't anybody care about this whole dinosaurs becoming extinct thing?
Chip Rockefeller , Wilma Slaghoople , Betty O'Shale , Fred Flintstone , Barney Rubble , Mick Jagged , Roxie : NO!
[Dinosaur Confessor walks away]