Sabrina : [about doctor visit] I heard you scream.
Salem : Yeah I screamed, ya should've seen the bill.
[The theme of the school dance]
Sabrina : The rocking '80s.
Hilda : '80s?
Zelda : I think she means the 1780s!
Hilda : Oh.
Salem : Welcome to Sabrina's Quizmasters! Here's the question: When witches make a BLT, they use bacon, lettuce and...?
Sabrina : Toes!
Salem : Wrong! The answer was cement.
Sabrina : Don't worry, the ground will break your fall.
Chloe : It could be worse.
Sabrina : Don't say it.
Chloe : It could be raining.
[Begins to pour rain]
Sabrina : You just had to say it.
Sabrina : In my family, some of my closest relatives are monsters.
Sabrina : [over phone] Hello? Anyone! Help, we're in trouble!
Salem : [relaxed] Yes that's nice.
Sabrina : Also, Salem, unless you pick up the phone now, those secret pictures of you are going out over the internet.
Salem : Uh-oh!
Sabrina : [Dangling over hole] I'm losing my grip!
Salem : [sarcastically] You can say that again!
Sabrina : There's nothing like cotton candy up your nose at warp 10.
Sabrina : Are you still upset that you were turned down for that role in 'That Darn Cat'?
Salem : Yeah.
Sabrina : Why does Harvey put mud in his pant cuffs?
Chloe : He's a guy. He doesn't need a reason.
[Salem accidentally swallows a button]
Sabrina : Did you swallow it?
Salem : It's not the ingestion I'm worried about. It's the out-jestion.
Sabrina : I just wanted a purse!
Salem : Yeah and Gilligan just wanted a three hour tour.
Sabrina : [bored] I can't believe we're going to Monument Island to learn about Johnny Cakes.
Gem Stone : What's a Johnny Cake?
Sabrina : It's like a pancake, except the natives didn't have any flour so they used sawdust.
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